Author Icyfireworks Posted January 21, 2009 Author Posted January 21, 2009 I think Im gonna. Your right, thank you. I think im gonna starting after tomorrow though. I dont know why, just after tomorrow. God she keeps making it hard on me though, She keeps looking at me when im not, but i can see it in the corner of my eye. She keeps flirting with me kinda, it was freezing today and we went to leave and she hugged me real tight for a minute because i was warm she said. And she looks hurt kinda lately when people aren't making her laugh So when i do look at her she kinda just looks at me for a while with this look on her face..like she wants me to know something. Like she misses me alot. She's basically acting like she did when we broke up and wanted me back. And shes being a little too friendly for just being friends.. Lately I've been acting real confident though, even if i had to fake it alot. Im smiling alot now, laughing alot, joking around alot. Im putting forth an effort.
awesomeallalone Posted January 21, 2009 Posted January 21, 2009 im glad your putting in the effort.... thats the first step....you what they say.... "fake it till you make it" good job just dont fall into her little girl games because thats all shes doing! playing with your emotions! thats not awesome!
Author Icyfireworks Posted January 21, 2009 Author Posted January 21, 2009 Yeah I know. Thanks for the support guys :]
saturnsfall Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 Ok, I have something to say! Maybe this story will grant you a bit of insight: When I was in eight grade, I started a relationship which (little did I know) would turn into my first everything. We spent almost everyday together, were in the same classes. Things were great. Then we entered into high school. We were in the same homeroom (keep in mind, homeroom lasts for FOUR YEARS!) Our Freshman year, he breaks up with me. My heart broke into thousands of mini pieces. I loved him, he was my everything (so I though) I thought I would marry him. My life turned upside down. It was the first time I ever experienced this type of heart ache. He was terrible to me. He said terrible things to his friends, and made the remainder of my Freshman year very uncomfortable. I lost friends because of how terrible he was and for a Freshman in a new school, that's very difficult to deal with. If she's being polite, you're lucky. You could have it a lot worse. She could treat you as me ex treated me. I felt like a total outcast when that relationship ended. I didn't think I could show my face in school. My next year (Sophomore) I met a wonderful man. He was a Senior and friends with a friend. We stayed together throughout the remainder of my time in high school, and on and off there after. This man, he was a TRUE LOVE. He was my everything. He is still in my life, and I still love him to no end. My point is: losing someone is difficult no matter what stage of your life you're in. It's challenging to pick up the pieces and more on, especially if you have to see this person (I know this from experience) But, you have so much time. So much time that you will experience wonderful things in life, things you don't even know are in the cards for you. I never thought I'd recover from that breakup. One thing though, what helped me the most, my friends. At first I didn't do anything. I shut everyone out. But once I let myself spend time with friends, they pulled me out of emotional turmoil, and opened my eyes to life and having fun. You can be upset over the relationship. But you cannot stop living. High school is something you will only go through once. You will always look back when you're older and reflect on your time in high school. You don't want to waste it. You want to look back one day and remember that girl who broke your heart, but go on to thinking about how great the rest of your time was and all the great things you experienced. These next few years are going to map your course! These upcoming years will guide you and make you who you'll be. You already learned something from this breakup, you have so much more to experience. Think about it.
BigRedBoss657 Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 Yeah, dude. It's tough for a while. But, look at no contact as a little competition for yourself. Each day is another point to add to that scoreboard. Eventually, you pass through the heartache, but you still probably think about her constantly. I myself am somewhat of the obsessive type; meaning, I have to think about it constantly until I do not want to think about it anymore.
D-Lish Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 This little girl is playing games with you. I agree with the poster that said her ego is obviously out of control if she is posting for the world to see that she is sorry for hurting you. You really have to stop worrying about what she is doing and why. What she is doing is screwing with you. Why? Because she can, and because you let her. Stop worrying thst if you ignore her that you will hurt her. She's not giving you the same consideration with regard to your feelings. If you truly want to have an impact- ignore her. That will drive a little girl with an ego crazy. You don't have to sit with her on the bus- you don't have to eat lunch at her table or hang out with her. Just focus on surrounding yourself with the guys right now. If she tries to keep hanging out with you, just ignore her. She'll get the message that her games aren't working. She's the one that wants the break up, so show her what a break up looks like. It means no contact. You're not her buddy, don't go in that direction. A good start is to stop sitting beside her on the bus. She actually sounds like she is enjoying the drama of the whole break up. Don't play into it. You must give the appearance that you are moving on. Post something on your own myspace that says "life is good"... Don't put things off- start right now.
Author Icyfireworks Posted January 22, 2009 Author Posted January 22, 2009 wow..i now feel like i should try harder.. theres still something there, i know it. i can feel it when were together..the way she acts and stuff i dont think im gonna give up, not yet. when i want something, i fight for it until i know its truly gone. and its not i can do something. maybe give her something to want and want some more, and then stop talking to her for a little bit and see what shes missing and then talk to her a few weeks later. it might work, then i can fix it all. i fight for what i want, and i want her. im not gonna beg or anything, im just not gonna give up. =/
saturnsfall Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 wow..i now feel like i should try harder.. theres still something there, i know it. i can feel it when were together..the way she acts and stuff i dont think im gonna give up, not yet. when i want something, i fight for it until i know its truly gone. and its not i can do something. maybe give her something to want and want some more, and then stop talking to her for a little bit and see what shes missing and then talk to her a few weeks later. it might work, then i can fix it all. i fight for what i want, and i want her. im not gonna beg or anything, im just not gonna give up. =/ Games are a huge no, no. You can't act one way, and fade out and hope she misses it. People miss each other because they genuinely miss one another. If your tactic worked, we'd all be using that and instead of people suggestion "NC" they'd suggest "The Miss Me Tactic" You just need to go to school, and spend time with your friends living. You're young. Don't focus so much time on this. If she's going to miss you, she'll miss you on her own. Trust me.
D-Lish Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 Whatever you do- don't try harder. That is the worst way to go. The best way to get her attention is to cut her off and make her think all is good with your life. What you want to do is turn the balance of power around. The only way you'll do that is to put her in the position of being the rejected party. If there truly is something there- don't chase after it. I think she enjoys the chase. I know you probably won't listen to this advice- but ceasing to give her any attention will work more in your favour than chasing will. Tell her you agree with her about the break up and that you are now moving on.... then stop talking to her. That will have more impact than anything else. You're too available to her right now. You want to give her the impression she is losing you. If she has feelings- this tactic will make her head spin and she'll come after you with everything she has. That's the key here. Make her think she has lost you.
Author Icyfireworks Posted January 22, 2009 Author Posted January 22, 2009 What if she takes it the wrong way and thinks i hate her? shes a really shy person..
D-Lish Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 What if she takes it the wrong way and thinks i hate her? shes a really shy person.. I think that is the mistake most people make when aiming for a second chance. You feel like if you don't remain intrusively present in their life- they will either forget about you or lose interest. The opposite will happen. It's human nature to want what you think you can't have. The way she is supposed to take it is that you are losing interest- that you aren't available to her anymore. You can continue to remain high profile in her life- be her buddy, let her string you along... but that won't make her want to come back. All that tells her is that she doesn't have to make any decisions about coming back because you are right there in front of her- willing and available. You're not a challenge to her. If you want to have an impact- act as if you are moving on. Act indifferent to her. If she thinks she is losing you, it will force her to think about what life will be like without you. Besides, you should be mad at her. She's playing games with you right now. That's super unfair. She's saying she wants to be broken up- but she is texting you and hugging you and flirting with you. It's important for you to show her she can't treat you like that. Actions have consequences- she broke up with you, show her she's not allowed to play these games with your heart.
Author Icyfireworks Posted January 22, 2009 Author Posted January 22, 2009 Well when she texts me or anything, i just ignore her. Her best friend and i were talking and she was telling me how she feels depressed lately and shes crying alot and she keeps doing these surveys and it asks her about when the last time she got butterflies and she keeps saying the day she does them. so her best friend told me it was me giving them theres something still there. i should just cut contact with her? completely? how long?
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