blind_otter Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 I learned via facebook that one of my close friends got her nose pierced. I'm supposed to see her this week and am trying to figure out how to react to this news. She will be upset if I am less than enthusiastic - but truthfully, I'm less than enthusiastic. Should I just be honest and say I think it looks ridiculous? Or should I not be up front and just pretend that it looks ok? I'm not against facial piercings, but you have to admit it looks odd on some people, and unprofessional on almost everyone.
Joyvke Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 I learned via facebook that one of my close friends got her nose pierced. I'm supposed to see her this week and am trying to figure out how to react to this news. She will be upset if I am less than enthusiastic - but truthfully, I'm less than enthusiastic. Should I just be honest and say I think it looks ridiculous? Or should I not be up front and just pretend that it looks ok? I'm not against facial piercings, but you have to admit it looks odd on some people, and unprofessional on almost everyone. Well, I'm a blurt and I would just say I don't like it. I would try and put it nicely and just say "not really into that kind of stuff, and I don't think it fits you well either, sorry"
steveraves Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 I agree with the poster above. Don't say you like it when you don't. You can tactfully say it's not your thing.
Geishawhelk Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 My mother turned to my brother, when he'd had his nose pierced, and said - "2 holes not enough for you?" And shook her head. He was left in no doubt...... 1
Trialbyfire Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 Don't you think it would be unfair of your friend to be upset if you're less than enthusiastic? I'd be honest with her, IF she asks: "Abigail, overall, I'm not a fan of facial piercings. If you like it, I'm glad you're enjoying it." IF she doesn't say anything, avoid the topic!
Author blind_otter Posted January 19, 2009 Author Posted January 19, 2009 I'm gonna go with avoiding the topic. She is a very enthusiastic person, overall (S/O calls her "gangbusters" behind her back...) so I'm pretty sure that if I say nothing, she will point it out. Then I'll have to control my facial expression. I have a very expressive face so I have a problem with spasms of disgust.
alphamale Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 Should I just be honest and say I think it looks ridiculous? Or should I not be up front and just pretend that it looks ok? if you're a true and close friend then be honest....if you're just a casual friend then lie thru your teeth and tell her she should get more
Star Gazer Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 I have a very expressive face so I have a problem with spasms of disgust. I do too. I don't play poker well because of it. I'd go with TBF's suggestion. Tell her you're happy she's enjoying it, but it isn't your cup of tea. Then change the subject.
EYECANDY000 Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 I think thats the beauty of having a godd friend, because you know they will be honest. Just tell her that you dont care for it on yourself, but if she likes it, then you love it. My friend and I are close enough where I value her opinion. that doesnt mean I am going to change mine, it just means I like to hear her input on it.
Trimmer Posted January 19, 2009 Posted January 19, 2009 I'd be honest with her, IF she asks: "Abigail, overall, I'm not a fan of facial piercings. If you like it, I'm glad you're enjoying it." I like this approach... Maybe just imagine what you would do if she got her hair cut really short without telling you beforehand... <ducks>
Trialbyfire Posted January 20, 2009 Posted January 20, 2009 I like this approach... Maybe just imagine what you would do if she got her hair cut really short without telling you beforehand... <ducks> Brat! I think blind_otter's friend asking her about her facial piercing, is equivalent to women asking their SOs, "Does this [insert article of clothing] make me look fat?". The moral of the story is not to ask, if you don't want an honest answer!
Citizen Erased Posted January 20, 2009 Posted January 20, 2009 A polite "hmn it's fine" and then quick change of the subject would be my suggestion. Anything slightly negative with annoy her and a compliment will indicate it is then okay for her to go into detail about when she decided to go and do it, where she got it done, who did it, what it was like, what everyone else thinks about it, how this person hates it etc etc.
Trimmer Posted January 20, 2009 Posted January 20, 2009 Brat! Heh heh.... I think blind_otter's friend asking her about her facial piercing, is equivalent to women asking their SOs, "Does this [insert article of clothing] make me look fat?". Yeah, or like saying, "OK, now let's see if you can handle this..."
D-Lish Posted January 20, 2009 Posted January 20, 2009 I think the bottom line is if the friend likes it and she is happy with it- I wouldn't rain on her parade. Something as trivial as a nose stud to others might be something uplifting to her. i wouldn't intrude on her excitement. Oh yes- I'd lie and say I like it. Different story if she was asking advice about her relationship or something else- I'd be candid as always. When it comes to appearance- I have learned that girls are really sensitive to criticism. My best friend is critical- whether you solicit her opinion or not. I'll leave the house feeling really good and meet up with her only for her to tell me she hates my outfit. Then I spend the rest of the night feeling like crap- feeling bad about myself. I dislike half the outfits she wears and don't like her hair very much... but I never say anything to her. I know she feels good about it, and I would never say anything. I guess the way I look at it is: you love the person, not the nose stud. Is it a stud or a ring? It takes a perfect face and nose to pull off a ring...!!! I like the tiny stud on lots of women.
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