halohalo Posted January 17, 2009 Posted January 17, 2009 okay so we were going out for a while and its been good. scratch that, i mean SO FREAKIN GREAT. i really love her and never felt like this before, shes very nice and loving. now to my problem. a couple days ago, her friend told me my girlfriends secret (which i begged out of her) and said she had another boyfriend. by then i was already shaking (dunno why) and she said she was dating him before we got together yet their still going out! i confronted this with my girlfriend and shes all sorry and said shes stupid (i told her some things to make her feel better) but overall she said she loves me and that shed rather be with me over him because she had a problem with him i guess. and then she told me he cheated on her once but she forgave him and still even if she broke up with him she told me she would hurt, but the other guy wouldnt care because he could get this other girl. I REALLY loved my girlfriend. i saw my future with her, i always thought about her, i wrote her poems even though im not so good at it. that is the first time i really felt the meaning love. then i decided everyone deserves a second chance, were only human right? so i told her i forgave her and stuff but i said i cant do anything about it until she actually does break up with him, but she said if i leave she'll hurt herself. all i want is for her to be happy, i told her if it helps i could leave her alone and never bother her again. she didnt want me to leave, then she said if she broke up with him, shed be hurting everyday. i dont want her to hurt at all. she said shes afraid to break up with him because he has anger problems and still loves him (note by this time she said she loves me more) and she said when she was sad, i always kept her happy etc. then her friend gave me his number but i never wanted to tell the guy because i want her to do it for herself. and it might be bad if i told him. then today she still hasnt broken up with him. i had a talk with her friend and she showed me their conversation and it says : "OMFG did u tell him his phone #?" "yea sorry" "if he tells paul i swear im gonna commit suicide" but why would she say that if she loved me? and before that when i had to go, she told her friend, "he could be gone for all i care." that really hurt me. to me it seems like she loves him more... i dont know what to do, i really really really loved her and cant see myself with other girls...
AlektraClementine Posted January 17, 2009 Posted January 17, 2009 I'm learning more and more on Loveshack everyday. One thing I have learned is that when people post problems that involve them being treated like utter crap by their SO and the OP still shows a strong desire to please the crappy SO, the OP isn't really interested in sound advice. Sorry to jump to conclusions, but if you're willing to stick it out with this Jezebel after finding all of this out, you're probably not very likely to take my advice. But here it is anyway. Dump this hussy!! Now! She isn't worth a single second of your time. It is my opinion that the suicide threat is bogus. BUT because we are told time and time again not to ignore suicide threats I would also suggest you tell a close family member (not a friend) about her threat.
Davey McG Posted January 18, 2009 Posted January 18, 2009 Sorry to jump to conclusions, but if you're willing to stick it out with this Jezebel after finding all of this out, you're probably not very likely to take my advice. But here it is anyway. Dump this hussy!! Now! She isn't worth a single second of your time. It is my opinion that the suicide threat is bogus. BUT because we are told time and time again not to ignore suicide threats I would also suggest you tell a close family member (not a friend) about her threat. Seconded. Dump that zero and get yourself a hero! Or if you decide to grow a pair, dump her and them tell him.
carhill Posted January 18, 2009 Posted January 18, 2009 OP, sometimes we love the wrong people. It happens. They're just wrong for us. You got the gift of truth. Your truth. Hope you embrace it.
wuggle Posted January 18, 2009 Posted January 18, 2009 Agree with all the above. You may love her but she doesn't love you (enough anyway) - leave her now, find someone who treats you with a bit more respect. Take care
O'Malley Posted January 18, 2009 Posted January 18, 2009 You deserve more than to be an option in her life. She's using you as filler material for what she doesn't get from her (actual) boyfriend. The fact that she has your head and heart in such a spin over her, despite her treatment of you, suggests how 'good' she is. There's no need to add to the drama here; just walk away from her and the whole mess and don't cave in to her rationalizations.
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