Possible to have self worth without money or friends?

[hotdancer2009]

Is it possible to have self worth without friends, a significant other, or money to do things you enjoy?

 

Read my previous posts for background.

[Nikki Sahagin]

I know a lot of people will disagree with me and say yes you can...but I don't believe that.

 

I think it highly depends on what type of a person you are. Some are more solitary and are quite content with being alone, enjoying their own time etc. Others are very much not. For me, I NEED to have someone/something to care for to have any self-worth; that's what makes me feel needed, validated, as though I have a place. Otherwise I feel I have no true purpose because i'm not enriching anything. So for me, my family, my boyfriend and animals are the things that give me validation and self-worth because through loving and caring for them, I feel worth something, important and needed. If things fall short in any of these departments, it hits my self-worth. But i've always been great at looking after others and not myself.

 

I think the money thing doesn't give validation. It gives you an ego boost. Obviously if you were poor and on the street, that would hurt your self-worth. But millions and millions doesn't equal happiness. It just equals short term satisfaction which you must constantly out do to feel good. I think money can only make you feel good if it's on something which can add to your future i.e. a house for your family or holidays for life experiences. But clothes etc - it's just hollow, 5 minute satisfaction.

 

I don't think I personally could have self-worth without others though. For some reason, I am not naturally 'content'. I rely on others to make me content on a day to day basis. I know that's terrible - but for now at least it seems to be how I am.

[LonelyConfusedSoul]

wow, i havent really thought about it, but i think you can take your worth from your accomplishments in life and your goals with what you have left to achieve or what you want to do

[carhill]

I just read one OP and I can categorically armchair dx depression, likely situational. Been there, lived that life. Easy to do when you're self-employed and live miles from civilization. Probably should've taken meds/gotten therapy for it, but it cleared up in a couple years. That was about 13 years ago. Had another bout more recently after taking care of my mom but got MC for our distressed M and therapy helped immensely. It's much easier to process the depressive symptoms and function.

 

To answer your OP, I definitely lived a happy life when I was single on little money but I always had at least a few good friends I hung out with. Humans are social animals, even the most solitary amongst us

 

You'll find your center again. It just takes some time.

[ruggy]

Hate to say it, but if ain't about money then Ruggy don't care. Not that I spend it. I just like to have it for security. As for a special someone, it is nice to have, but I would survive without one. I probably could live in solitude with no problems or worries. A little depressed at times though. I could NOT live with out financial security. I'd be bouncing off the wall worrying about which bills to be paid and such. Wish it was different, but as Suze always says. Money first, then people, then things.

[DSM-IV Tom]

Interesting that you have created a topic regarding this subject, considering your name displays haughtiness and/or arrogance in general. "Hot"dancer.

 

You made this topic I'm guessing because you have been abandoned by (or have trouble finding) friends? Most likely because you have an attitude that resonates haughtiness and pretentiousness? (Such as calling yourself hot, or bragging about things)?

 

The key isn't finding self worth without friends. The key is to become modest (none of that hotdancer bs) and find friends. Sounds too easy to be true, doesn't it? But that's how it is.

[Frankasy]

Yes it's very possible to have self-esteem without friends or money. Well personally for me it would be a little harder without money but still it's manageable. But in order to have this self-worth you gotta have a strong will and of course be a strong person, not someone who gives up quickly, who breaks down right away etc. It's a very long discussion, you need to be more specific in which category you fit it or are wondering about.