Ruby Slippers Posted January 13, 2009 Posted January 13, 2009 OK, I may be jumping the gun here a bit, but I thought I'd ask since I have very little experience with casual dating. I am a serial monogamist with a history of long-term relationships. I broke up with someone four months ago and promised myself I would be single for a full year to work on my stuff. I've hardly been single, and I always get so much done when I am. This weekend, I met a guy that I could really see spending some time with in a light capacity. He is a fabulous dancer, and I have been wanting to get back into swing dancing (used to do it all the time). I discovered a great jazz club this weekend that has swing bands and a great dance floor. I mentioned the idea of him learning the basics (I know he'd pick it up in no time), since this jazz club draws mostly couples and I'd have a lot more fun going there with a dance partner. Of course, I think he probably either wants a FWB situation or a relationship, and I don't want either right now. What concerns me is that the initial attraction was strong. He called me today and we discussed the possibility of getting together this weekend. He said he'd call throughout the week to keep in touch. I could see myself maaaaybe eventually having sex with him (I get negligible enjoyment from casual sex, but going without for a year is hard, and I might warm to the idea if I get to know him and like him enough for that), but I have a hard time imagining a relationship with him. He's very sexy and buff, but does not seem quite up to my standards intellectually. So, what is the best way to maneuver through this? I will definitely tell him I'm going to stay single for the full year (8 months to go), but how do I frame the rest of it? I'm not really a casual person, which I guess explains my confusion.
boxing123 Posted January 13, 2009 Posted January 13, 2009 Don't waste his time. Plenty of "non confused" stable women out there he could be meeting. Wow, he might get laid if he is lucky, lol. And what is he gaining out of this? Besides being used to cure your boredom? Why not tell him the truth? Impossible? "Hey you are not intelligent enough for me, but you are buff, and maybe I would sleep with you. MAAAAAAAAYYYBEEE. If you reaally get to know me. Want to go out?"
bayouboi Posted January 13, 2009 Posted January 13, 2009 Don't waste his time. Plenty of "non confused" stable women out there he could be meeting. Wow, he might get laid if he is lucky, lol. And what is he gaining out of this? Besides being used to cure your boredom? Why not tell him the truth? Impossible? "Hey you are not intelligent enough for me, but you are buff, and maybe I would sleep with you. MAAAAAAAAYYYBEEE. If you reaally get to know me. Want to go out?" lol something tells me i need to read your post history, this is hilarious
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