She Needs time to Think

[ihcolt]

I studied abroad a year ago and met this wonderful girl in Monterrey Mexico. I ended up coming back down this last August and work here now, with no plans of returning to the US at the moment. While seeing her a year ago we were just friends not having sex till the night I left. I didn't care about the outcome and just enjoyed her presence to the fullest. When I returned things began very quickly, started dating and got into a relationship. I was not truthful to myself or her and deep down knew I needed to be single for awhile so I could meet new people start a life in this new country. Well, this did not happen, I said I wanted a relationship with her. I love her creativity, loves reggae which is one of my loves, and her general presence and tranquility in life. I have found myself getting caught up in the relationship, less working on improving myself and more on satisfying her.

It is now January and we have been in a relationship for about five months. From the start I never clearly looked deep within in what I wanted and what I liked about her and what I didn't. We never had a discussion talking about this until this last weekend. It came about that she asked me if I had sex with other women during this time and I told her the truth that yes one time I did.

 

Since then we have sat down and she has told me what she likes and dislikes about the relationship. Her being able to do this has made me realize I need to do the same. I do care for her a lot and part of me believes she and I could have a great relationship if i regain control of my life and allow myself to fully understand what I want in this relationship. However we did not make this clear from the get go and she has apprehension about if we can start over.

 

I find it so hard to be truthful to myself, I am on the fence a lot of the time about what I want. She says she needs time to think about us and if there is a future. I agree with her since I need to do the same with myself and our relationship.

 

I want to mend what we have, I'm confident if I am truthful to myself and what I want that we can have a great relationship together. Now that I know more about her I feel confident in who she is, and what a great lover she can be. I want to have a relationship with her now, I didn't in the past months.

 

I know its impossible to know but do you think this relationship is long gone or do you think it can be brought back to life, a new beautiful life?

 

Obviously, I know I have a lot more to learn about myself and becoming a man. However at this point in my life I would like to continue on my learning journey with her. I think there are things a man can learn about himself when in a relationship and also when single.

 

What advise do you have to help us get back together or do you think since the foundation had not been set in the past that it would be hard to get back on track in love?