4givrnt4gtr Posted January 12, 2009 Posted January 12, 2009 So, Ive been dating this guy for a month now. I knew him for a while, almost 4 years. He asked me out back in October, saying he liked me for a while and was happy he has now the chance to ask me out. I didnt want to get into anything since I had just broken up with someone who made me feel unappreciated and ultimately rejected in small ways (which unfortuantely chip away to anyone self esteem) Anyhow we hanged out for a while as just friends, then in December we decided to start dating. After that things seem to be going dowhill for me. Immediately after we said we were dating exclusively, he reminded me that he is supposed to go home in August to get his MBA. I knew this already but him reminding me that made me very nervous and wonder if its worth getting into something that ultimately is going to end. A few days later we talked about it again, and we discussed the possibility of continuing the R after he moved away..yet Im not very convinced this is what he really sees happening... Then sometimes we talk about his ex. This girl he had been with for 5 years dumped him early last year to be with someone else. Just yesterday he told me he felt "utterly worthless" when it happened and he hit a low depression. This ofcourse makes me wonder if Im may just be a rebound for him. After all it has only been 9 months since the breakup. And then, the little things that make me wonder if he does like me, or just likes the idea of being with someone. For instance, This past weekend he asked me to come over. He made me a very fancy dinner, wine and roses included. I had never been treated so well. So the whole nite was wonderful, though we dont have sex (more on that later). Then the next day we get up, hang out, walk around downtown, you know, nice things. All was well until we went back to his room. He started making out, getting me very horny. Halfway thru he tells me we cant do anything because he doesnt have condoms. Now, at first glance, its not a big deal...but this is the second freaking time he does this. Gets me all worked up and then, sorry, not today. The first time I was really irritated, because he had no excused, he just said "not today, i want you to think about it and really want me when we do it". So ok...i take it a bit hard, but in the end I choose to see it as an extended foreplay. So this time around he was very apologetic...saying he didnt want to seem like a tease but he couldnt find condoms when he had looked for them in his apartment before i got there Friday. (I guess he hasnt heard of a drug store). Now im pissed but dont really know what to say. He had also asked me what could he do to make it up. What i wanted him to do to me. I had no idea....I was just irritated and nothing would make me feel better...so I tease him for a while. But then I take pity on him and finish him off. Then, right after, he ask me what time i was leaving. I was taken aback...i asked him if he wanted me to leave. He kinda hesitated, then said no, that i needed to watch a movie he wanted me to see....Still, i had the sense he wanted me outta there. So now im even more pissed off...but i ended up falling asleep on his bed. A few hours later I woke up and said i was really tired but i should go. I feel he reluctantly offered for me to stay if i "wasnt going to make it home". So i get up, do some internet stuff and then tell him I was leaving. At that point he had fallen asleep. He woke up for a second, whimpered a bit, said he would miss me but ok..that he would walk me downstairs. I was a bit miffed he didnt insist on me staying so i said that i could walk myself out which he allowed. Now before he looks like a total jerk, he had spent thursday night at my place, and I spent friday nite at his, plus all of saturday...so in a way i could see he needed some space...but still...in a way i feel like...why would you want the person you like and just started to date to leave? Am i wrong about that??? Anyway, this morning i got a text saying that he hoped i made it home safe and that he had a great time. I texted back saying i did too and thank you for the dinner flowers and good time. I didnt get any response to that, or any phone call at all the rest of the day. So anyhow, all that is making me feel a bit rejected, and insecured...Im not really sure if he likes me for me, or if he likes the idea of being with someone plus he is covering up the hole his ex left. I remember this old feelings from my past relationship and now Im wondering if maybe I should better be alone that with someone I have so many questions about. Yet, besides those instances, he is such a sweetheart to me so far. He is considerate sweet and just adorable. So...from this little tale, would you guys say its worth it giving him more of a chance? or would I be better off alone? Thank you guys for reading...
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