sarabear86 Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 So this guy I have been seeing since October is an Engineering major and this is his last semester so it's really been tough on him...we're extremely happy with each other and get along great. This is the best relationship i've ever been in and I can really just tell that we have something special. The problem is...towards the end of the semester he was lacking on sleep and really stressed out. He told me he wasn't sure things were going to work because he's so busy and this next semester (which starts in a week and a half) will be even worse. We were both really upset and regardless of my attempt to tell him everything will work out and i'm okay with only seeing him a couple times a week (which I am, i'm completely fine with it because i've been in long distance relationships before). He said he just doesn't think it would work but that this wasn't him giving up forever (though he said he didn't want to hold me back to forget that he said that). Over winter break we texted more and more throughout break and finally decided that he really missed me and started talking affectionately again with me like normal. We started hanging out when we got back in town last week he has initiated hanging out with me and we've been acting like how we are when we date, i know for a fact he's not in it for any action because we are both virgins and okay with it and he barely ever is interested in girls because he's so busy. I just know his feelings are genuine for me. Today while i was with him I brought up what we are doing...and it pretty much got around to that we will see how things go and not put much obligation on it but we both still want to be exclusive...but the more we talked about it the more worried he became. I told him i wasn't worried (even though i am...but only because HE is worried, not because i dont' think it could work if we both try) and i told him everything will be fine because of how we feel abotu each other and that i'm okay with not seeing him all the time if he's stressed etc. But i'm still worried now...because he is. and i'm not sure what my next step should be and how to act...! help me!
Geishawhelk Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 You play it cool, casual and as if nothing were happening. You act as if you've forgotten the discussion completely. I hate to say it, and I don't mean this unkindly, but - He seems a bit of an attention seeker. he's really stressed, he's under pressure, it's going to be a tough semester.... It sounds as if he's saying - "Woe is me, look at me, I'm working so hard and I'm not going to be able to devote myself to feeling loved, so love me anyway, won't you?" I know it sounds ass-faced, but I get the impression he's trying to make sure he has your full attention. Well, guess what? A lot of peopole are under pressure. Heck, my partner is a final-year Law studient at university. I knew it would be hard. I knew he'd have to focus on his studies. I knew they were going to have to take precedence. Did he have to say anything? Nope. Did I feel neglected or left out? Nope. It's Life. Sometimes you can't be 'number one all the time', all the time. And neither can he. That's what being in a relationship is about. Understanding that occasionally, we have to step aside. We have to suck it up, because that's the way it goes. Now get over it and finish your strawberry sundae.
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