griffinchicken53 Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 sometimes i get the impression people don't want to have anything to do with me, mostly because this has been the case in the past. you know, like i've invited someone to go do something, they say they can't: busy, not feeling good, etc. but then i'm out and see that they are out not doing what they said they were doing. so now anytime i invite someone to do something and they give me a reason or reasons that they can't, i assume i'm being blown off. how can i be for sure?
Geishawhelk Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 If they're genuine, they'll make a decision on the where/when, when you say to them - "OK, you decide when, then......"
You'reasian Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 sometimes i get the impression people don't want to have anything to do with me, mostly because this has been the case in the past. you know, like i've invited someone to go do something, they say they can't: busy, not feeling good, etc. but then i'm out and see that they are out not doing what they said they were doing. so now anytime i invite someone to do something and they give me a reason or reasons that they can't, i assume i'm being blown off. how can i be for sure? Ask. If they give you a reason, accept it and plan something else. Let them come to you next time.
Author griffinchicken53 Posted January 10, 2009 Author Posted January 10, 2009 most times people don't really seek me out, not as a one-on-one basis anyways.
kizik Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 I don't get invited anywhere. Since I like myself a good deal, am fun to be around and know I'm a great guy, I no longer assume it's me. In reality, people are generally self-absorbed and don't care about anyone else, except their little BFs and GFs. OP, I'll invite someone out a maximum of three times. If they have rejected me 3 times - see ya. I don't need to be rejected again. I will remember the fact that they rejected me 3 times, and simply not invite them out again.
Author griffinchicken53 Posted January 10, 2009 Author Posted January 10, 2009 this is all good advice...I just worry. I don't want to always have to do things by myself.
You'reasian Posted January 10, 2009 Posted January 10, 2009 this is all good advice...I just worry. I don't want to always have to do things by myself. Doing things by yourself can be fun. You can meet a lot of people that way. Most people get lazy, don't want to do things - get caught up in life and are often not available. Basically, people can be selfish. Even being an active, energetic person who goes out and does things could be selfish too I suppose. I've gone out and found some great friends just persuing my hobbies/interests.
Author griffinchicken53 Posted January 13, 2009 Author Posted January 13, 2009 most people i know are in relationships, establishing a career, raising kids, so not much time for hanging out, other than couple-friendly activites like movies, dinner, etc. most of my hobbies dont correspond with my age. i'm into restoring old cars and go to club meets but everyone is 10-20 years older than me. i've done some with photography and joined a club, but it was just retired people.
You'reasian Posted January 13, 2009 Posted January 13, 2009 most people i know are in relationships, establishing a career, raising kids, so not much time for hanging out, other than couple-friendly activites like movies, dinner, etc. most of my hobbies dont correspond with my age. i'm into restoring old cars and go to club meets but everyone is 10-20 years older than me. i've done some with photography and joined a club, but it was just retired people. Ever consider race sports (running, triathlon)? Age range seems to be about 25 - 45. And they are health-minded people too.
birdie Posted January 13, 2009 Posted January 13, 2009 most people i know are in relationships, establishing a career, raising kids, so not much time for hanging out, other than couple-friendly activites like movies, dinner, etc. most of my hobbies dont correspond with my age. i'm into restoring old cars and go to club meets but everyone is 10-20 years older than me. i've done some with photography and joined a club, but it was just retired people. I think it's similar to relationships in the sense that there are certain kinds of people we get attracted to as friends. I have a lot of laid back friends that are a bit on the lazy side and like doing things last minute - but I like their calmness and coolness so being the organised one is a small sacrifice. Other people that are on the go all the time and who have diaries and are booked up weeks in advance do my head in - yet they are probably the ones that will call you more
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