Men - has a woman ever invited you on a date and then paid for the entire bill?

[Tomcat33]

Oh and for the record and to recap

 

Runner

Righguy

Carhill

Lino

 

Have ALL said they have had a woman pay for a date when they were asked.

 

They responded to your orginal question which was:

 

So have any of you ever had the experience of a woman asking you for a date and then following the logic of the invitee pays and picking up the entire tab for drinks, dinner etc?

 

The rest of the guys FOR THE MOST part just piped in to bitch and complain about women wanting to be equal and not paying and all that nonsense they DID NOT ANSWER YOUR QUESTION either way. So if they didn't answer your question we don't count those men either way.

And then there are few more guys who said "no this has never happened to me."

 

SO if you want to now change the question to how many women ask you out on a FIRST date and pay then to be fair you should start a new thread because that is NOT what you asked here whether you meant to or not.

[boxing123]

Tomcat, come on...I have had plenty of relationships where things just flowed, and women never said "I want to take you on a date tonight" after we have been seeing each other for a while.

 

Obviously we are talking about the first or second date, as that is when asking is more formal and direct.

[carhill]

If the parameter were narrowed to a *first* date, I can only recall that happening twice in nearly 20 years of being single. So, for me anyway, rarely. Let's spare the server another thread on eating and who pays

[The Collector]

TomCat, the following post and the three women that endorsed the admittedly funny flogging a dead horse link weren't a way of saying this thread and subject has run it's course?

 

What more is there to contribute? You asked women if we pay on dates we said yes, and that is STILL not good enough 9 pages later you change your question and ask if we pay on a first date.

 

The answer is NO because a lot of us don't ask men out on a first date.

 

I don't know what other magic answer you are looking for?

 

You are now flogging a dead horse with your assertion that I have somehow changed the nature of the question. I'm telling you what I meant, I think it's pretty clear, and if it's not I've since clarified, so I don't see the problem.

 

Again, this thread is primarilly asking MEN if they have experienced a woman sticking to the 'who invites, pays' logic.

[BareGoddess]

Last time I checked this forum was for MEN and WOMEN.

[Tomcat33]

I'm telling you what I meant, I think it's pretty clear, and if it's not I've since clarified, so I don't see the problem.

 

Again, this thread is primarilly asking MEN if they have experienced a woman sticking to the 'who invites, pays' logic.

 

Well for 10 pages people interpreted what you wrote we were not reading between the lines your point and question was VERY clear:

 

So have any of you ever had the experience of a woman asking you for a date and then following the logic of the invitee pays and picking up the entire tab for drinks, dinner etc?

 

So own THAT much at least you are beating a dead horse because you keep saying that you meant something else. Even when you post a fair go at getting people to share their views you skew it many PAGES after the fact because you didn't like what you read. THAT is what is beating a dead horse. Why didn't you pipe in pages ago to say you actually meant something else? HECK after the first post in response you could have said "no wait that is not what I meant" it took you 9 pages of not reading what you had liked to have read to realise that is not what you mean to say? Warning here comes the lauging til I cry faces: :lmao::lmao:

[Adamagnet]

And you wouldn't want to be with someone like that anyway, right? We all want to be appreciated.

 

Actually, I don't know. One of my longest relationships was with a woman who had a similar self centered attitude, but that was years ago. Maybe I have matured...

[carhill]

Gotta love it. Man asks men for experience on topic. Women respond and proceed to pummel questioner on both form and function of inquiry. Why is this not unfamiliar to me? Oh, right, those two women who asked and paid. :D

[The Collector]

Last time I checked this forum was for MEN and WOMEN.

 

And this is my thread and I am quite entitled to ask a question directed at men, just as there are some threads that are directed at a female response.

 

You are welcome to contribute, but I am asking men for their experiences. And I would like to humbly apologise if my original question was unclear, and ask the men who responded that they have had a woman pay their entire bill whether this was as part of an ongoing relationship, or it was part of the first or early stages of dating.

 

For reasons I have made clear, and are obvious to anyone not being dogmatic, during a relationship the odd outing where the woman pays is still going to suit the woman if the ratio isn't roughly 50/50.

[stefspets]

I asked my current BF on our second date, and I paid for it. He asked me on the first date, and he paid for that. First date was drinks only (not very expensive). The second date was more expensive.

 

The guy has normally paid for the first date with me but pretty much every one has been for drinks, or coffee, or ice cream--inexpensive. If the guy can't afford to buy me an ice cream cone for the first date then he should have come up with an idea that was free. Of course if I was dating a guy for his money that I wouldn't go for that, but instead the really fancy restaurant and expensive meal.

[JerseyShortie]

What is it that a man should "give of himself" specifically in return for sex that you would consider fair? Also, what of the opposite? What would you "give of yourself" to a man in return for his sexual availability?

 

 

I'd like a man that was honest, sincere, mature, respectful and open about what he wants his relationship with me to be. And I the same for him. Where we can build on something that has a foundation before we just jump into bed together. I think alot of men today have the expectations tha the sex comes first and then the "relationship".

 

 

JS, with all due respect, I'm sorry that this is how your perceive men. It doesn't corroborate my perception. Sure there are men out there who want casual sex no strings (or lunch) attached, but they are fairly easy to spot and weed out if that isn't your bag... They usually aren't interested in my passions or have that inauthentic player quality to them (where you know their priority is getting you into bed). Not to mention, they usually won't call back if you make it clear you don't sleep with guys casually. So, in a way, paying or not paying has very little to do with it.

 

I don't think you really know how I perceive men to be apologizing for it based on my one post. To me it sounds like you are talking about a stereotype of a "player". Something that is black and white. Sure, there are men out there that are obvious players. There are also men out there that are school teaches, love their mom and have a dog that are "players". Other men yet can easily date a woman, never really make his entire intentions be known, she thinks it's builing on something more, he is just having a good time with the sex. Not all players have a player quality to them.

 

As for paying or not paying, I think you've missed my point a little bit. Sure, a player can pay for a date and that doesn't mean interest. But I want a man to want to take me out because he wants to. Not because he feels he has to and who under his breath is going to be grumbling about paying. I think if a man has issues with paying, I question how invested he is in me. Standardly, men don't want to be taken advantage of for their money and women don't want to be taken advantage of for their body.

[JennaGennaro]

The Collector,

 

I'm not a man, but I can speak on behalf of the course of my relationship with my BF (now husband):

 

I don't like this whole woman equality thing either and then expecting the man to pay (reminds me of and old I LOVE LUCY episode).

 

Anyway, when we were dating, we took turns in a way wherein he would pay the complete bill, I would pay the complete bill, he would pay the bill and I would leave the tip, I would pay the bill and he would leave the tip. This has continued throughout our entire 11-year relationship. And this goes for as small as a cup of coffee and a bagel to a couple of subs at Subway to a nice dinner at a moderate place to an extremely expensive (in my book) dinner for $50 a person.

 

But we use this method with just about everything. If he has a prescription at Walgreens to pick up and he asks me to pick it up - I pay and I don't ask for the money back and he will do the same for me. If we are at Home Depot or something and I put something in the cart and he puts something in the cart we will take turns paying. And this might set us apart from other married couples in that we do not have a joint checking account.

 

Edit: When we go to the movies we take turns or one buys the tickets, the other gets the refreshments (if we get any). But, if it is a movie that one really wants to see and the other has doubts, we have a rule that the person that suggested the movie pays that way the invited one has no right to complain about the other's movie choice. :-)

[HEARTBROKENHURT]

I've been out with a few women that do that. I see nothing wrong with it b/c what goes around comes around ya know?

[Shygirl15]

This is an offshoot of the 'men who don't pay' thread. When defending the practice, many women, and some men, trot out the 'whoever does the inviting should pay' logic. Now we all know that 99% of dates involve the man asking the woman, which I have no real problem with. But occasionally a woman might suggest a meet, or ask for a date. So have any of you ever had the experience of a woman asking you for a date and then following the logic of the invitee pays and picking up the entire tab for drinks, dinner etc?

The Collector, I'm on the phone with my BF and I'm typing exactly what he says:

 

"whenever my GF invites me she pays the whole bill. It's kind of unspoken rule that whoever invites the other pays for the bill. Being a gentleman however, I always offer to pay, but she's very strict to the whoever-invites-has-to-pay rule, and I'm very grateful for that".

[clv0116]

Never had a woman pay for a date, ever. A very few weakly offered to split the tab, but I won't split tabs. If a woman really wants to go dutch she should ask for separate checks when placing the order.

 

In that case I could be OK with it I guess.

[JennaGennaro]

IF I were single today (and I had the courage to ask a guy out for a first date) then I believe I would offer to pay. Now, some guys are just chivalrous and will not let a woman pay and I would not want any man to feel like he was being emasculated so if he insisted, even if I did the asking, then I would.

 

It really saddens me that so many of the women in today's society have caused most men to sour and think that ALL women are gold diggers and leaches and want nothing than to have a man jump through hoops for them and spend massive amounts of money on them. I just don't like the whole entitlement attitude. I guess I am just too old-fashioned, but I am glad I was raised differently and SO glad that I found a man that appreciates this in me because I would hate to be dating these days and having a man think I am just using him or after him for what he can do for me.

[Ramrod]

I got asked out by a woman, with whom I began a two year relationship, we ate at a nice Mexican restaurant, sadly the margaritas topped with grain-alcohol gave her a head-ache, but she did below me in the car before we went in, so, all in all, it was a pretty good date.

 

The bill was in the low forties. If I remember correctly, knowing she was going to paying in advance, and since she had just BJ'ed me, I ate modestly, I had the enchiladas swissa (chicken enchiladas, topped with a white cheese and a green sauce).

[pelanchito]

Never had a woman pay for a date, ever. A very few weakly offered to split the tab, but I won't split tabs. If a woman really wants to go dutch she should ask for separate checks when placing the order.

 

In that case I could be OK with it I guess.

 

clv!!! No!!!!! really????? YOU, of all posters, NEVER HAD A WOMAN PAY???? Un-be-lie-va-ble, you sound like such a winner, so charming and like such a gentleman!!!

 

BTW, only losers who fly to southeast Asia or Latin America on budget package tours to f*** little girls and or boys would ever use the term sex tourist so freely...no wonder you don't split the tab, the madam of the whorehouse where you find your "dates" won't let you, I bet she asks for your cash upfront, always :D:D

[clv0116]

... BTW, only losers .... would ever use the term sex tourist so freely.

 

That and people who can read.

 

EDIT:

 

Good god - that wasn't even in this thread - are you stalking me now?