Isolde Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 A guy did this once, french kissed me after a date, only, after 2 weeks of not talking to me to admit he didn't feel chemistry or anything. I was upset at the time, now, I'm a bit amused that he would do that, and a bit curious why he tried. A peck on the lips I would have understood, but not the deep tongue. Do guys just like to have a bit of fun even if they don't feel it? It seems my better dates did not end with a kiss.
carhill Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 A guy can just be horny and not be sexually attracted to you in particular. I've experienced the corollary, where a woman who doesn't find me attractive will flirt with me, grab me and kiss me just for the ego feed of my response. After she gets what she wants, I go back to being invisible in her world Keep dating. You'll meet a sincere guy who likes your lips
Author Isolde Posted January 9, 2009 Author Posted January 9, 2009 A guy can just be horny and not be sexually attracted to you in particular. How depressing is that, haha. I admit to hooking up with one guy I wasn't particularly attracted to, but I was really young and desperate. Interestingly, we never french kissed. I would never french a guy I wasn't attracted to. It's someone's tongue and mouth. To me, it's really really intimate to do that.
movingonandon Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 Attracted or not attracted - baby, I'm kissin' . No tongue though - that's not a kiss, that's making out, and most people don't make out with people they don't find sufficiently attracted, so let's be precise here. Kidding aside, for the longest of time (4-5 dates) i though I wasn't particularly attracted to my current girlfriend, but kissed her anyway (although it did take a while). Anyway, good thing i stuck with it, because a month later I find her increasingly hott and hotter and hotter all the time. We will not work out in the end, but that's not because of lack of (mutual) attraction. So, he might not be particularly attracted to you right now, but you might grow on him . Also, why is being just horny depressing? He likes you enough to make out with you (yes, men do have standards!) - so have some fun, if you like him enough to french-kiss back!
Author Isolde Posted January 9, 2009 Author Posted January 9, 2009 movingon, good advice, but this was over a year ago and i've, shall we say, moved on.
Confusedalways Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 I am not a guy- but maybe he was just really attracted to you but upon reflection or whatever didn't think it was worth continuing to date you, or whatever.
Trialbyfire Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 Isolde, is it possible that he was trying to/testing for, some chemistry with an intimate kiss?
alphamale Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 ...Guys, would you kiss a girl you were not attracted to, after a dinner date?. generally?? No
carhill Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 I would never french a guy I wasn't attracted to. It's someone's tongue and mouth. To me, it's really really intimate to do that. Thanks for that. Perhaps I've read a couple friend's wives wrong On second thought...how depressing Nah, I'm going to stick with the ego feed thing.....hmm...do women get horny? Things are so complex when you get to the no hair, enlarged prostate stage.... OP, seriously, I remember that age. I was more reserved than most guys but it definitely was nondescript horniness; pure hormones.
lino Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 I wouldn't but I know of a lot of guys who would kiss or even have sex with a girl they aren't attracted to. I don't think it's sad or depressing that some have that mentality but it's not something I would do. I would only ever be physical with a female that I find attractive.
runner Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 nope. maybe a peck on the cheek, but thats as far as i would go.
Author Isolde Posted January 9, 2009 Author Posted January 9, 2009 I wouldn't but I know of a lot of guys who would kiss or even have sex with a girl they aren't attracted to. I don't think it's sad or depressing that some have that mentality but it's not something I would do. I would only ever be physical with a female that I find attractive. I just think it's sad because it leads the girl on if she likes the guy, it would be the same if a girl did that to a guy. It's not a HUGE deal to be kissed without intent, but one would like to assume the person tonguing you is at the minimum sexually attracted to you. This is why I now avoid kissing strangers. It feels SO insincere. Sure maybe it sounds like I'm taking it all too seriously, but kisses mean so much more when two people are at least attracted to each other for real.
refurb Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 How depressing is that, haha. I admit to hooking up with one guy I wasn't particularly attracted to, but I was really young and desperate. Interestingly, we never french kissed. I would never french a guy I wasn't attracted to. It's someone's tongue and mouth. To me, it's really really intimate to do that. That's funny. French kissing is really intimate, but him sticking his penis in your vagina isn't? (at least that's what I assume when you said "hooking up") RF
carhill Posted January 9, 2009 Posted January 9, 2009 Yeah, I've always wondered about that.....maybe it's the proximity to the brain
Author Isolde Posted January 9, 2009 Author Posted January 9, 2009 That's funny. French kissing is really intimate, but him sticking his penis in your vagina isn't? (at least that's what I assume when you said "hooking up") RF I was horny and irresponsible at the time. I'm a bit embarrassed of course. Of course I understand guys being horny and hooking up with a girl or kissing her without intending to have a relationship. It doesn't mean I like such behavior, in men, women, or in myself.
lino Posted January 11, 2009 Posted January 11, 2009 I just think it's sad because it leads the girl on if she likes the guy, it would be the same if a girl did that to a guy. It's not a HUGE deal to be kissed without intent, but one would like to assume the person tonguing you is at the minimum sexually attracted to you. I agree but there are a lot of people around who think otherwise. In my experience, every woman who kissed me found me physically attractive, as far as I know anyway
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