Wicked Child Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 I'm just trying to gain some insight..Obviously I can't decipher anything by posting in forums and asking complete strangers what's going on..I'm really just looking for opinions and what not on this sitch... Ok, so I hung out with a coworker of mine one evening about a month ago, and he totally put the moves on me..I'm attracted, so I went with it..We ended up getting pretty hot & heavy, but didn't sleep together(we were also extremely drunk that evening). Since that evening, he has texted/emailed me constantly..Sometimes we just banter about our work days, other times we're exchanging some randy innuendos..Contact always starts from his end..I approach with caution for obvious reason (Did I mention he's one of my bosses?) But never fail, there's always at least a text or email a day (usually several)....I've been toying with the idea that there's a possibility that said dude could actually be interested in me, as opposed to just hooking up, as I have never been pursued for sexy time like this before. A few nights ago, he met me @ a local pub on his own accord..where we both proceeded to get lost in our own little world, oblivious to anything else..Now, the flirt factor was totally off the charts, sometimes he would touch me quite sexually, other times, he would just kinda grab my hand and gaze into my eyes..I know the "I wanna rip your clothes off" look that men get, and while I caught that a few times that night, it wasn't the only look I got....We ended up sleeping together that evening..To my surprise, he's still blowin me up..So, I guess I'm confused as to how I should approach/view this...I mean, I'll just keep followin his lead until the next step, but should I even have the idea that he could actually LIKE me? I dunno, how would you carry on if you just wanted sexy time??? I know everyone is different, and doesn't approach things the same way, but things seem to be a little more intense than just some fleeting sexual desire...
Author Wicked Child Posted January 8, 2009 Author Posted January 8, 2009 I can def. see that....Maybe I'm just ignorant to this supposedly whole different breed of man...
boxing123 Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 If you read my thread, this is exactly what I am talking about. He contacts you every day, and is also probably not sure as to what you are thinking.Yes, it seems he likes you. But what are you unsure about? If you have sex early, are you always wondering if the guy just wants sex and nothing else? Is that a turn off for you?
Author Wicked Child Posted January 8, 2009 Author Posted January 8, 2009 I guess I'm really just trying to put my next step into perspective...Trying not to get carried away by this wonderful attention I'm getting, but also wondering if I should express a little more interest...I don't really care where this goes...I mean obviously if I dated this guy, It would be totally cool, but if it doesn't happen, and we have a FWB thing going on, that's cool too..I also don't want to go an express more of an interest and scare him off, if he's just lookin for some fun, yanno?
amaysngrace Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 Well if you're cool with the situation then just sit back and enjoy the ride. If you change your mind I will help you tame this beast.
boxing123 Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 LOL That might be the same point he is at. So without communicating it really is impossible. It really is sad males and females can have sex, but cannot openly and freely communicate without worrying about "scaring the other person off". I am in the same boat, almost exactly.
Author Wicked Child Posted January 8, 2009 Author Posted January 8, 2009 Yanno, the fact that he is newly divorced (less than a month) also sits with me...It's a classical case of rebounding or what not, but I seriously have not been sought after like this...I've been a rebound many times..Hell I think it's what I was put here for sometimes...And although it should be a textbook case, everyone obviously doesn't work the same way....I've been told numerous times that I intimidate people and my independence can put people off...I do that..I guard myself heavily..(6yrs with a jobless jerk will do that..) And I know that assertive, independent women can really screw with men.....I'm trying to find a balance between guarding myself completely, and getting completely swept up in fantasy, and it's really effin hard...
carhill Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 Yanno, he might not really be divorced For example, my wife and I own separate homes and I could easily tell a woman I'm divorced and invite her back to "my" home for a little fun when my wife is spending time at her place. Not exactly honest and something I'd never do, but there ya go. Regarding what he wants, I think that's pretty obvious. He's probably had his eye on you for sometime. IMO, I'd remain disengaged and just enjoy the fun aspect. His MO does sound practiced for a newly divorced man, so he probably had "experience" while he was married. How long was that, BTW? Well, you asked a gentleman's opinion, so I gave you one
boxing123 Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 Wicked, I have a question. What do you mean by "independent". The girl I was inquiring about also labels herself as "independent" . As a man, that makes little sense to hear, as we are naturally independent. So when a woman says it, I think of it meaning "closed to a relationship and men", or "having walls up". I have no idea of how to proceed with a woman like that, or whom defines herself as such. I never call myself "independent", because it is second nature. I am a man, and meant to be. Can't you be independent, and still have a relationship? Still have and express feelings? Or is that only for "dependent" people?
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