KissTheRain Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 Yes I know there is an exact same thread, but thought of adding it there but then the story became a bit long and I thought might as well start a new thread instead of hijacking the other one. This is exactly even what I am pondering. Whether to leave the city or no. I thought I would simply post here instead of creating another thread. I moved here (Her City) for a a job with my sister 3 and a half years ago. A year later my sister moved back home, and almost at the same time, I had found a my ex now who moved in with me. She had been in the city for over 9 years and her family was living away she was in college then. We lived together for 2 years and some months till, her Mom moved back to town and she split with me. The real reasons I still dont know, I figure though she tells me a lot of things, it was just that she was not sure where this was going. Whatever her reasons the fact is she split up. Now, in between the 2 years I had an option of moving back home and working there I found a better paying job and my family was there. At the time I chose to stay back for her in her city, so she could graduate and we could continue our relationship, and really she had her exams in a month and she had no place to stay if I had moved on. And things were fine, they seemed to fine back then. We were so involved that leaving each other was out of the question. But now, she has left me and it has been 3 months and I have been living in hope. But now after the new year it has become very very difficult for me. I still live in the house we found together, she has moved in with her mom in a new place soon after the breakup. And in this city everything I did was with her so it is like a ghost town where I dont want to even go out as all it does it remind me of her and how we used to be. At times I cant even go shopping to the store we used to visit. I dont like going out cause I might even bump into her. I hate getting home cause I would come home to her and now she is not there. Most of my friends in this town were hers. So now I really know about 2 people at most here. I have applied for a new Job back home, and most likely I will get it too. Apart for a job back home there is some family business too to be taken care of. I have more friends there, and I have never lived with family, so it would be nice (Always in a boarding and then University in different country) though in the long run I feel this city is better for my job, but right now I hate my job even cause I am super depressed, and really this is not what I am here for I feel deep inside me I am sticking around for hope and wasting my time. On another thought I feel I should move to a better apartment and not change the city, and start from there in this city. It is a much nicer city with much better prospectus in every which way. I am not in desperate need for money so a better apartment in a better location can maybe make me feel better. And would be a nice change. And I can continue this job or change jobs in the city. I dont know what to do. I came to this city to work, then I found someone here, who made me stay for her and for our future, now neither she is there, and nor am I happy with this job. I have hope but it is simply an "evil", what do I do? My current lease form this apartment gets onver at the end of the month, my land lord can extended it till whenever I want, but I know I dont want to stay there for sure. SOP its either, a my home town, or atleast a new apartment. I am confused, but I no longer want to be depressed.
samspade Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 Just take her out of the equation, completely, and weigh the two options. New city is better, sounds like you have employment options in either city... One thing I can tell you is if your friends and family are in the old city, that might be better for you. You can't always count on jobs, apartments, and girlfriends for your happiness - that is what your family and close friends are for. All things being equal, I'd probably go to the old city, UNLESS the one you're in now excites you so much you want to stay.
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