Inflikted Posted January 7, 2009 Posted January 7, 2009 Alrighty. I'm pretty sure I've posted my story here before, but let me sum things up for you guys. Early in 2008, I got back in touch (via MySpace) with a girl I had a huge crush on when we were in grade school. We exchanged messages for a while, and she seemed pretty happy to have heard from me in the first place. Learning more about who she's grown up to be, I started getting feelings for her again. 'Course, there were (and still are *some*) complications. When one of the big "complications" cleared itself up, I panicked, and jumped the gun about writing her and asking to meet up to catch up in person. I think I made her pretty uncomfortable with that (my timing was bad, and looking back, I really didn't build up to it all that well, just kinda sprang it out of nowhere). She never answered me back... I wrote again a couple of weeks later, just saying hi, trying to get SOME response, and again, nothing... Disappointed, I backed off, feeling down about how I screwed things up with one message. :/ It's been about four or five months since then; I didn't write to her again until recently. The weekend after Christmas (last Sunday, I think?) I wrote her, just asking how she's been doing and wishing her a late merry Christmas. The week passed, and again, no response... These last couple of days, I've been trying to just get over this "defeat"; I figured, maybe I can see how things are in a few years, and try writing again. Yesterday morning, though, I woke up to an e-mail notification that I had gotten a message back on MySpace from her! She responded back to my Christmas message, and even though she didn't mention the last two messages I sent months ago, she seemed in good spirits to be talking to me again. So, I've been pretty happy all day that we're at least back on speaking terms. That's at least a minor victory, I think, heh... But now I'm bringing myself back down to reality, here, and trying to figure out where to take this from here. Seems I've been given another chance, here, but after I messed things up so bad a few months ago, I no longer trust my own judgement. :/ I just don't want to screw things up again, yanno? And even if I can't get a relationship going, I don't want to get her to stop talking to me again... At the very least, I like being able to write back and forth with her.
BobrigoSanchez Posted January 7, 2009 Posted January 7, 2009 I would just like to point out that she is as much aware of the messages she ignored as you are. That being said, don't keep any sort of hope. Sounds like the last time she contacted you, she was being polite.
Author Inflikted Posted January 7, 2009 Author Posted January 7, 2009 Well, in the message she just sent to me, she wrote it in such a way that it leaves me open to reply. That's a good sign, isn't it? I mean, she could have just said a short "thank you", and cut the conversation right there. Either way, I don't expect her to have the same interest level as I do right now, but I don't think that's something I can't change. When I originally wrote about meeting up, I picked a bad time to do it, and like I said, I didn't really build up to it, just kinda sprang it out of nowhere. And considering how many weirdos there are on the Internet, I don't think I painted that nice of a picture of myself doing that. :/ But, now that she's willing to talk to me again, I'm trying to start fresh, and take it one step at a time. I know that if I want to pursue this, it's going to be a long, bumpy road, and that nothing is going to happen overnight. The first thing I need to do is start building her interest in me. Problem is, I don't know how to do that; aside from my overall inexperience with girls and making myself come off as "attractive" to them, the fact that our only means of communication right now is MySpace makes things even more difficult. So, what I'm asking is, how do I try to advance this as best I can, but at the same time, tread lightly enough that I don't mess things up too bad?
BobrigoSanchez Posted January 7, 2009 Posted January 7, 2009 What you're asking then is a question in the fine art of seducing women. There is just too much to be said on this topic, and it makes it doubly difficult, as you pointed out, to really get her interested from a long distance. So, you have some studying to do. But a good start is somehow conveying to her that you have an interesting and attractive life. Through myspace I would guess that you would have to post your best pictures (if you're not all that confident in your looks, work on it! It'll make you feel better) Make sure you add some social pictures in there too. If you are lacking a social life, this is something you need to work on also. There are many things that need to be right with YOU first. It's a looooong process and there are no guarantees she'll bite. One guarantee tho is the fact that if you frequently send her unsolicited messages, even tho you may think they're sweet, without showing that you have something else going on in your life, you are not going to interest her. I'm going to reiterate the point: Your life and self must look attractive to her first, you cannot give off a vibe that you are terribly interested in her and a big chunk of your gray matter is dedicated to her likeness. This, my friend, is only step 1 of 100.
Author Inflikted Posted January 8, 2009 Author Posted January 8, 2009 Alrighty, then. Anyone else have anything to add?
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