bonehead Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Was in a great relationship I thought. Met a wonderful woman, things were doing really well. Started talking about her and her two youngest kids moving in with me and my kids. At first we were talking about this coming spring. Then people started saying she should move in this past fall so that the things that needed to be done ot get her house around for sale could be done with no one living there, plus wouldnt have to heat it this winter as much. In July she set a date of October 18th to move in. Over the summer things went really well. I think a lot of it was we were each others break from the stresses in our lives. She had lost her job and started her own business that wasnt going quite as well as hoped. I was ng with an 80 year old mother that went from walking 2-3 miles a day to being in the hospital and not recovering after a fall. Her business wasnt doing well. It wasnt failing, but she wasnt able to draw any pay. She was getting by on unemployment. The end of July my mom came to my house to stay. between things I had to do to the house and things I had to buy for her to be there I laid out about $3000. I ended up a month and a half behind on my house payment. I would have gotten the money back but mom died a few days after coming to my house so her accounts were froze. I was in contact with the bank and had a plan to repay what I was behind. Then my transmission went out. There went another house payment. Stayed in contact with the back, but as he said, they still send out their little " you owe us " letters. But they didnt take any forclosure action. they were willing to work it out so I paid the half the back payments with income tax and the other half over a year. I was getting the " you owe us " letters one a month. Made a call and it was " yup your ok, its done automaticly " so not that big of a deal. Still a little stressful for me just worring that something else might go wrong and fall behind more. I hadnt told her about being behind. They moved in the midle of October. One day I left one of the letters on my dresser and she read it. Yes I know I should have told her. I filled her in when she asked but Im not sure she believed me. Her business was still not doing well. She got very distant. The second week in November she said she had to close her office but was going ot try and keep business going, and would have to move back to her house because my house is out in the middle of nowhere, back country roads, harsh winters. She said she didnt want us to end, and that hopefully by spring thngs would be going better and they would move back. She remained very distant. We set the Saturday after Thanksgiving for her to move back to her house. She still said she didnt want us to end. This was the first Thanksgiving since my mom died, so it wasnt a great day for me to begin with. I wasnt in a good mood to begin with and hse was even more distant. My kids were not home yet as they had stayed the night at a friends. I knew I could go back into work as there was an open shift on a rescue in the north part of the county. I finally decided that she didnt want me there, put a uniform on and left for work. Kids got home about 20 minutes after I left. Oldest called me and asked me to not go to work and come home. So I went home for my kids. When I pulled in the driveway she came out and I bet we spent 45 minutes in my truck talking. She said that she didnt want us to end, this is just how she deals with stress and she would try and do better. I promised to try and not take it so personal. The rest of the day didnt go to bad. Wasnt great but better then it had been in a week or two. We stuck to the plan of her moving on Saturday, we got most of her stuff moved. She came over Sunday to pick up some more, and hasnt been to my place since. Says her feelings have changed. WTF?? I think she KNEW Thanksgiving that this is what would happen. Why the show? Why didnt she just let it end that day. I think thats why this has hurt so bad and so hard to get over. She had me feeling bad for taking it personal but now it loooks like it was. Any ideas?? She still has spome things at my place that I need to get to her. Because of her business when she moved in she had satellite internet installed because I cant get any other high speed internet at my place. I dont want her to have to pay the cancellation charge so I have been giving her the money for it. I have asked her to see if they can change it an start taking it out of my checking account and I havent gotten an answer from her yet. Its like she wants a little contact, but not a relationship. I have tried to get her to get her things, yet it falls on me. WHY?????
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