getonwithlife Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Hi to you all. Let me start by saying that it has now been a little over one year since my break-up. Folks, for months it was everything I could do to muster the strength to get up in the morning. Like most of you, I felt as though I could never get over the break up. There couldn't possibly be anyone who could replace her. I woke up thinking about her, went to work thinking about her, went to bed thinking about her and yep, I dreamed about her. I planned ways to get her back. I wrote dozens of letters she never saw. And a couple she did. And there was the uncomfortable first time seeing each other after the break up. My friends had "Carla" fatigue. I cried. and cried, and cried. Im not the crying type. Six months after the break up I moved away. She was still on my mind daily, but the blinding pain decreased significantly and I was then able to think about things in a sensible manner. I soon realized that all of the pain and despair that I had been feeling had more to do with deeper seated problems I had been having for a while. I started to see that I wasn't all that happy before I met her, and she ended up being a life raft I grabbed ahold of. Dont get me wrong, losing the one I had fell in love with certainly added to my problems. But that was just the tip of the iceberg. Fast forward to the past week. After this Christmas, I began receiving text messages from her.... "Hi, hope you had a nice holiday XO" Then the three line, one year biography of her life, And Lastly the "Would you give me a call later if you have the time?" Well, in the past year I have been able to regain control of my feelings, but it was still a difficult call for me to make. The hour long conversation we had was not important for its content, but more for how it made me feel. I had some of the old hurt well up a little but was in control the whole time....She seemed more uncomfortable than me and spent a great deal of time building me up, asking my opinion on issues in her life, and ending the conversation by saying she would like to feel as though she could call me again, and she may would like to come visit. She did, still does, and probably always will have a piece of my heart. But whatever happens from this point, I am completely at peace with.... Its not about who is under whose thumb, or if she becomes a part of my life again (unlikely), Its about me finding my own happiness. Im willing to bet it is the same for most of you if you really dig a little deeper. Were you truly happy with yourself before you met her, or him? Be honest with yourself. I may be off the mark with some of you. Anyway, I just wanted to let you all know that one day (hopefully in the near future) your pain WILL subside. Try to use this time to learn about yourself. Know that you are not alone in this. Know that you will come out on the other end a better person. God bless you all.....
EmperorR Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Thanks for your words, it's always good to read stuff like this.
DSM-IV Tom Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Yes, you're the man. Your brain is wired very efficiently. Much respect for your perspective and way of talking/thinking. I am impressed. You are the first person on this site to achieve this reaction from me.
openbook08 Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Anyway, I just wanted to let you all know that one day (hopefully in the near future) your pain WILL subside. Try to use this time to learn about yourself. Know that you are not alone in this. Know that you will come out on the other end a better person. God bless you all..... thats lovely. just a lovely post, thanks so much. i hope life works out for you so that youre as happy as can be! thanks for sharing your story.
alwayssme Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 very nice and inspirational post...glad to hear everything turned out good.. i do believe in times like these, we can work on ourselves...no matter what, at least we have become better individuals!
KissTheRain Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Thank you for a lovely post, I cant wait for a year to pass for me and se how I am doing then. Right now its been only 3 months and I am still quite shattered.
kizik Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Yes, you're the man. Your brain is wired very efficiently. Much respect for your perspective and way of talking/thinking. I am impressed. You are the first person on this site to achieve this reaction from me. Tom, you're like a robot who is crazy. OP, thanks much for the words. I'm 8 months out and feeling better, but still have rough days like today. Your wisdom and experience helps.
mm4184 Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 just a question.. did you move to get away from her or did you have something to do and that's why you moved? because i'm at the point where i think it would be so much easier if one of us moved so we don't see each other but i don't want to "run away" from my problems.. people say i gotta just suck it up and face it. but ahhhh, i'd like to move.. don't know where but i can technically work anywhere with my occupation..
Author getonwithlife Posted January 18, 2009 Author Posted January 18, 2009 Had somewhere to go.....Job lined up elsewhere.....
Recommended Posts