BobSacamento Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 So there is a woman I'm interested in. Thing is she tells me about all the guys who hit on her, all the guys who creep her out, all the guys who check her out and creep her out and even has read love letters from guys. I feel like it's my duty to stand strong when she flirts with me for all those poor bas****. I can't help but feel attracted to her but I feel like I'm heading right into a trap. What do I do?
confused_2008 Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 So there is a woman I'm interested in. Thing is she tells me about all the guys who hit on her, all the guys who creep her out, all the guys who check her out and creep her out and even has read love letters from guys. I feel like it's my duty to stand strong when she flirts with me for all those poor bas****. I can't help but feel attracted to her but I feel like I'm heading right into a trap. What do I do? I'd personally stay the hell away because I wouldn't want to be one of those poor bastards myself. I don't know, it just feels to me like she doesn't have any integrity. I'm sure it feels good to have a girl with so many "options" interested, but I would feel too disposable.
Author BobSacamento Posted January 6, 2009 Author Posted January 6, 2009 Yeah I've been playing it cool right now. It's just the thought of a missed opportunity that bothers me. Although every day she pulls that crap I said before she becomes less attractive.
fishtaco Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 She tells you about her men and then flirts with you? Normally when women tell you about other men it's because you've been friendzoned. But then she shouldn't flirt with you. I'm not sure what that means. Maybe she needs validation by having men "want her".
Author BobSacamento Posted January 7, 2009 Author Posted January 7, 2009 Yeah she says she tells me more things than she tells her BF. I thought I had been friendzoned too. Then she still would touch my arm, squeeze my arm, pretty much bump into me on purpose and also she pulled a move where she walked away after asking me something and then turned around real fast to see if I was checking her out lol. Luckily I waited longer than usual that time
fishtaco Posted January 7, 2009 Posted January 7, 2009 Oh, she has a BF too. LOL she's trouble. But good job playing it cool. Well if you want you can play mind games with her, assuming you don't care about her BF (he's not your friend...etc). It'd be good practice. You know she wants something from you, at this point probably just wants to conquer you like she has conquered all the other drooling idiots that tried to get a piece of her. So maybe you can throw some mixed signals at her. Feed her a bit of what she wants then withhold it. Dangle it in front of her like a carrot. She can smell it but she can't have it. Make her work for it. Who knows, it just might turn her on enough you may get lucky. When you're playing the game, if you're not careful, the game will play you. You're banking on her indiscretion. Although that applies to you too. When you play, sometimes you lose. Don't lose by falling for her. She's not date-able. A mean version of it would be to pay more attention to women that are obviously less attractive than she is, in front of her. This way you're amplifying her insecurities, and she might do something drastic to get you to switch your attention back. That's when you guide the something "drastic" toward what you want. A less "game" version would be don't play mind games with her. But don't give her what she wants either. Because if you give her victory, she's outta there. You'll be tossed in the trash and forgotten. I assume she's attractive. Having attractive women around you makes you more attractive to other women. I don't understand it, I just know that's the way it is. So by having her around, you'll get more attention from other women. See if you can get her to unwittingly be your wing woman. I mean if you're not going to date her, you're not going to be friends with her, you're not going to practice your game with her, then that would pretty much be her only use. If you don't want to do that either, then stay your distance. She's not worth your time. Unless you have other things you can get out of her, like maybe business contacts or whatever.
D-Lish Posted January 7, 2009 Posted January 7, 2009 Oh, she has a BF too. LOL she's trouble. But good job playing it cool. Well if you want you can play mind games with her, assuming you don't care about her BF (he's not your friend...etc). It'd be good practice. You know she wants something from you, at this point probably just wants to conquer you like she has conquered all the other drooling idiots that tried to get a piece of her. So maybe you can throw some mixed signals at her. Feed her a bit of what she wants then withhold it. Dangle it in front of her like a carrot. She can smell it but she can't have it. Make her work for it. Who knows, it just might turn her on enough you may get lucky. When you're playing the game, if you're not careful, the game will play you. You're banking on her indiscretion. Although that applies to you too. When you play, sometimes you lose. Don't lose by falling for her. She's not date-able. A mean version of it would be to pay more attention to women that are obviously less attractive than she is, in front of her. This way you're amplifying her insecurities, and she might do something drastic to get you to switch your attention back. That's when you guide the something "drastic" toward what you want. A less "game" version would be don't play mind games with her. But don't give her what she wants either. Because if you give her victory, she's outta there. You'll be tossed in the trash and forgotten. I assume she's attractive. Having attractive women around you makes you more attractive to other women. I don't understand it, I just know that's the way it is. So by having her around, you'll get more attention from other women. See if you can get her to unwittingly be your wing woman. I mean if you're not going to date her, you're not going to be friends with her, you're not going to practice your game with her, then that would pretty much be her only use. If you don't want to do that either, then stay your distance. She's not worth your time. Unless you have other things you can get out of her, like maybe business contacts or whatever. That's good advice. I think that anyone that needs to continually vocalize how sought after they are has insecurity issues. The term attention whore comes to mind. It's all about boosting her own ego through the validation of male attention. I think Fish is right, if you turned your attention elsewhere or started mentioning other women, she'd go bonkers. Is this kind of girl worth it though? She has a bf, flirts with other men, gives you mixed signals... I'd just go straight into distancing yourself. You don't want to fall for someone like this.
burningashes Posted January 8, 2009 Posted January 8, 2009 Yes- distance yourself. Say you don't want to hear any of that, that would make her go bonkers. She wants you to want her, even if she's not available. Or tell her straight up what you've posted- that she has a ego and it's turning you off. If it continues, then you'd be doing yourself a favor by stepping out of the picture. She doesn't sound like someone you'd want to be with anyhow?
Author BobSacamento Posted January 10, 2009 Author Posted January 10, 2009 Thanks for the advice everyone, it's all very helpful. I do feel somewhat bad for her to an extent. She seems very needy. And some people are just like that. She said recently that she's had a "Talk" with her BF about his drinking problem and that this weekend was the test. But she said she wants to remind him of the talk. Maybe she doesn't want him to fail her or she doesn't want to be out of the relationship. I didn't know what to say to what she said so all I said was: "Well I guess the game is on then isn't it?" She has seemed rather distant lately which I guess is what I wanted. For the majority of the week she was like that but I could tell something was on her mind so over Coffee I asked her how everything was going. Now you might say why the hell did you ask her?!?!? Isn't that what you were going for?!?! Well I can never sit and watch people stew. It kills me. So then on Thursday she let it all out and went in a giant rant about how he doesn't listen. It was pretty awful lol.
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