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Posted

So I'm just wondering...When you are with your bf/gf and the phone rings or a txt comes through...do you ask who it is? Is it wrong to ask, invasion of privacy? He never asks me but most of the time I volunteer this information.

 

TIA!

Nikki

Posted

My boyfriend asks and I usually ask too. I think it isn't that big of a deal. It only is a big deal if you have something to hide or they do. I find it normal to ask-- especially if they are getting calls/texts constantly or at weird times. If my boyfriend got a call very early or very late I would definitely ask. I normally ask anyway.

Posted
He never asks me but most of the time I volunteer this information.

I think you guys are doing it perfectly :) -- don't ask them AND volunteer the info if you are the one receiving the call/text.

 

When you guys have been together long enough, you'll each instinctively know who it is; and if your relationship is not there yet it is kinda none of your (or your partner's) business.

 

Plus. IMO, feeling compelled to ask indicates insecurity of some sort which, if acted upon, is just unattractive behaviour.

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Posted

You read me like a book. I have my own insecurities due to being badly hurt by my son's father. I am doing so much better and have fully given my trust to my bf. I just get a little uncomfortable when it comes to the phone. I just wonder I guess and most of the time he will tell me, but not all the time.

Posted
I have my own insecurities due to being badly hurt by my son's father.

Yeah, it is tough not to project the ex's crappy behaviour onto the new guy (or girl) but, IMO, it is best to just remember that we are in a brand new relationship and do all we can to not infect the new with our painful memories and crappy past experiences.

 

It sounds as if you're doing well in keeping your past where it belongs, so congrats on that :bunny:

Posted

I never ask my gf who's texting her because I know I may not always like the answer and I don't like her to cause a scene about it. She normally doesn't say anything after reading the text if it's someone she doesn't want me to know who it was, but if it was someone like her mother she would just say "oooh mum just text me...."

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