heuver Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 So heres the story... I recently turned 21. Woohoo...I can finally go to bars. Heres my situation. I travel often. Its very common that I'm in another state or country at a hotel for 2-3 days at a time. I'm almost always alone while I'm away. Anyhow, being new to the bar scene, I was looking for easy ways to meet girls, break the ice, and yes, I'm looking to have a one night stand or two while away. Any suggestions? I'm new to bar etiquette and customs, and I don't really feel that my "game" is top notch. I know, I may sound immature looking for a one night stand, but give me a break...I'm 21 years old, and you only live once. Being alone may be the hardest thing to overcome, as well as my biggest advantage. Nobody else to get in the way, however its pretty hard to approach someone while alone, as I feel kind of geeky. Please, someone fill my head with your vast knowledge of hooking up! Thanks!
carhill Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 IME, same as everywhere else except the ladies are a bit more touchy-feely. Bars are where my bald head is most likely to be fondled Seriously, just go and have a good time. I usually would hang out and listen to the live music. Women like music and musicians so there ya go...
Charles1978 Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 Easy... you aren't from there, know nothing about the place, in town for just a few days... pick out a girl and ask her questions about the city you're in... where to eat, what to do, blah blah blah. It's an advantage! No need for stupid pickup lines.
Lauriebell82 Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 So heres the story... I recently turned 21. Woohoo...I can finally go to bars. Heres my situation. I travel often. Its very common that I'm in another state or country at a hotel for 2-3 days at a time. I'm almost always alone while I'm away. Anyhow, being new to the bar scene, I was looking for easy ways to meet girls, break the ice, and yes, I'm looking to have a one night stand or two while away. Any suggestions? I'm new to bar etiquette and customs, and I don't really feel that my "game" is top notch. I know, I may sound immature looking for a one night stand, but give me a break...I'm 21 years old, and you only live once. Being alone may be the hardest thing to overcome, as well as my biggest advantage. Nobody else to get in the way, however its pretty hard to approach someone while alone, as I feel kind of geeky. Please, someone fill my head with your vast knowledge of hooking up! Thanks! Okay I'm a female: I'd hit the club scene if you want one-night stands. Ask someone at your hotel where a cool club is, they would def. know. Lots of "loose" girls looking to hook up. I've been hit on tons of times at clubs (even when my boyfriend is there!) and I think it's lame when a guy comes up to me with some stupid line he made off. Huge turn off. I think a good line would be to approach a woman (or a few woman) and just start talking to them. It's a nice touch to ask how the girl's night is going or comment on the music. If she starts talking ask her if you can buy her a drink. If she turns you down, then she probably isn't into it so basically just say, okay maybe I'll see ya later." And leave it at that. It's always good to just go out on the dance floor to scope out chicks. Find some girl you like and ask her if she wants to dance. Guys used to just randomly come up to me and I wouldn't care, but you can tell a guy who is more respectful if you ask first. And they can always say no, therefore that would save you the trouble of having her randomly just pull away and ditch you. As you can see, I have a ton of experience at clubs (I went to "under 21 clubs since I was 16). and I know what I like guys to do and what I don't. Oh another technique: You could always go up to the bar (and this works if you are alone) and pretend to look around. Then ask the girl if you have seen a guy come through here (your imaginary friend, describe what he looks like) and that you thought he was going to meet you there. Then suggest that while you wait you can buy her a drink. Now this technique works, however in some cases it would just be easier to go up to the girl and ask her how she is doing and ask to buy her a drink. Okay so thats all I can think of at the moment, but respond and I'll give you more.
runner Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 i'll never buy a girl a drink if i just met her and was just chatting up. i'd feel like i was grovelling for her attention.
Lauriebell82 Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 i'll never buy a girl a drink if i just met her and was just chatting up. i'd feel like i was grovelling for her attention. If she is drunk, thinks you are hot, and is looking to do some dancing, I doubt a girl (a one night stand kind of girl) would pass that up and feel like a guy is groveling. Getting a free drink and an offer to "chat up" and then go dance at a club is awesome! (if you are drunk and lookin for a hookup or someone to hang with for the night) As far as the drink thing goes though: it's best for the guy to start chatting until his drink and hers are empty. Then he should order himself one and turn to the girl and ask if she wants another. That's smooth and casual.
Kamille Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 The best thing to do is go in with a good sense of humor: you are going to get turned down. Women like getting approached - but you have to remember that most women out in bars probably already have a 'prospect' scoped out. And no, women don't always reject men gracefully (because often when you try to be graceful about it, the man pretends to not notice you are turning him down). The second: don't let 'landing a girl in bed' be your focus. There is no bigger turn off then a guy who makes you feel like his ego is riding on whether or not he 'scores' with you. Go out, get to know a few girls, establish a connection with them, and if something more happens good for you. If not, ask for her number so you two can meet up next time you are in town. Try to approach girls when they are standing alone (for instance when they go to the bar or to the bathroom). If you approach a group of girls, salute all of them and then introduce yourself more specifically to the girl you like. I was discussing the topic of approaches with my girlfriends after a rather unfortunate encounter at a bar and we all agreed: the trick, especially when approaching a girl in a group, is to approach her, speak for two three minutes and then leave. Then, later on in the night, approach her with something cute. And of course: don't fall into the "I need to impress her with my life" trap. Don't spend the few minutes chatting her up summing up your life's work. BORING. Ask her questions (again about her town, etc) and show her that you are paying attention to what she says. Last night, after asking me where I was from, a guy spent five minutes telling me about all his travels. He then asked me again where I was from. I don't care how many countries he's visited, if he can't remember the one thing I said, he's disqualified. Letting a guy come home with you is all about the quality of the connection you feel with him. So just be yourself and be easy-going. And again, have a sense of humor about it. Smile a lot.
Author heuver Posted January 6, 2009 Author Posted January 6, 2009 Thanks for the advice and feel free to keep in coming. I'd say I'm pretty good looking. Definitely have a sense of style and a sense of humor, so I got that going for me. I feel if I hang out at the hotel bar, I have a huge advantage for bringing a girl to my room...after all, we both have rooms upstairs. I'm just so lame when it comes to my approach. I'll have to practice.
Lauriebell82 Posted January 6, 2009 Posted January 6, 2009 Thanks for the advice and feel free to keep in coming. I'd say I'm pretty good looking. Definitely have a sense of style and a sense of humor, so I got that going for me. I feel if I hang out at the hotel bar, I have a huge advantage for bringing a girl to my room...after all, we both have rooms upstairs. I'm just so lame when it comes to my approach. I'll have to practice. True, but if you meet a girl at a hotel bar then I strongly suggest buying dinner or suggesting going out for a walk or something. If you just give her some drinks and want some sex she'll probably be turned off and think your using her. (unless she's a slut or a hooker)
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