Posco_Proudfoot Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Drunk people at a party, lots of flirtin, everybody went to bed, guy and girl start up that was flirting all night, girl stops him, and then he doesn't call back. A classic story that everyone has seen and heard.
Tomcat33 Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 She might be able to get over this, but it will take a lot of times of not hopping into bed getting it on with coworkers in beds at parties to rebuild her reputation and to get a decent guy to want to really date her, for real. Trust me, I know. Listen it's great that you are working through your own skeletons in the closet but the OP didn't ask if what she did was wrong or not she is asking why the guy won't call her, if you want to comment on that great but all the other judgemental crap you keep harping about is unecessary. She doen't need you to make her feel 1inch tall for her choices, right OR wrong, she did what she did and I don't think this was an open call for a public lynching unless you misunderstood what she was asking in the OP.
You'reasian Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 A bunch of co-workers get together, get drunk, party and sleep over. Sounds like a bunch of teachers. jk
Perry Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Good posts, Oregon Beaver. Taintedlove, excuse me if I missed it, but how much time passed between that night and now? If it has only been a couple of days....
torranceshipman Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Oregon Beaver, you clearly delight in pointing the finger and trying to make this poster feel really small and ashamed. You didnt even read her post properly-she said she was a virgin. Clearly she hasnt been around the block quite as much as you might have, to realise how guys can be, but she did the right thing and has NOTHING to feel ashamed of. Honey, two things to learn here. One - Men can be pretty forward when it comes to wanting one thing!-so you stick firm to your principles and NEVER try to compromise them to make a man like you. Two - there are lots of people like Oregon Beaver in the world who'll enjoy making you feel small and ashamed of yourself simply because they're not very nice. Ignore people like this.
Perry Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 lol the posters here are funny. Drama-filled, but funny. Maybe the title of this thread should be changed to the "Oregon Beaver Hour," since they are sooooooo fixated on her, instead of the original post. Take a bow, Miss Beaver.
D-Lish Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Take a bow, Miss Beaver. Wait, whoa...hold on! If she takes a bow, she could very well be sending the wrong message by showcasing her butt in public. Don't take a bow and bend over- it could very well take a long time for you to get your reputation back by walking rigidly uptight, er I mean, upright until it's time for the senior citizens home. I can't believe anyone would slag a virgin for kissing a guy at an x-mas party...Not even removing a piece of clothing. She probably had her parka on for crying out loud. Good for you, you got a little x-mas action... if he doesn't call you- he's not worth a second thought from you.
Perry Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 How did that ever be called a "beaver," anyway? Time to do a Google search.... *types in "beaver"*
You'reasian Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 No skeletons in the closet, judgments, or "lynching" here. If she wants to be loose and be the type of girl who guys don't want to get serious with but is just seen as an easy lay, nothing wrong with that! Guys will appreciate a girl with that reputation! . Will they ever respect her? As a colleague that is? I can understand if there were some relationship intentions. One way to get their sexual urges met with minimal effort and zip emotional investment. But they will respect the girl without that reputation, the kind they can be proud to take home to Mom and fall in love with. I have the feeling that this poster is looking to be that type of girl, but she has some ground to make up, and that involves letting go of this guy ever respecting her and moving on and starting over. Could a relationship start from a one night stand that turns into something else?
D-Lish Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 No skeletons in the closet, judgments, or "lynching" here. If she wants to be loose and be the type of girl who guys don't want to get serious with but is just seen as an easy lay, nothing wrong with that! Guys will appreciate a girl with that reputation! One way to get their sexual urges met with minimal effort and zip emotional investment. But they will respect the girl without that reputation, the kind they can be proud to take home to Mom and fall in love with. I have the feeling that this poster is looking to be that type of girl, but she has some ground to make up, and that involves letting go of this guy ever respecting her and moving on and starting over. I don't understand how you are coming to these conclusions. She's a virgin that made out with a guy at a party. In order to be loose and get a bad reputation- one has to actually engage in copius amounts of penetration with different men. Um... she's never had a penis inside her. That's hardly loose, or horrible. "That type of reputation"...?? How can a girl that refused sex be an easy lay? No logic in your condemnation whatsoever. Are you just trolling to be deliberately antagonistic?
Posco_Proudfoot Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Tongues will be wagging at work. Companies I worked for had stuff like this happen and no one said a word the next day. Nobody really cared, except talking bad about him for not calling her when he knows she likes him. Times have changed.
Tomcat33 Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Leave it to Beaver, hehe. :lmao: Beaver likes its fair share of wood, you don't see anyone making a point of that. Well until now that is...
Perry Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Beaver's mom was purdy. I bet in real life Eddie would try to hit on her in the kitchen.
D-Lish Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Just because you disagree with me, doesn't mean I'm antagonistic. She was in bed getting it on with a guy she wasn't dating, making out when coworkers, etc. were all there, possibly in the same room. Tongues will be wagging at work. That is just life. But you can avoid it by not putting yourself in that situation, and you can still be the fun person everyone likes without putting yourself in that situation. I can deal with disagreement when facts support it- that's all. It's actually full-throttle judgement I disagree with. When you use words like "loose, easy lay"... It doesn't reconcile with the OP being a virgin, nor does it support the facts the OP has offered us. I can read your thoughts about it perhaps being unprofessional- and you made a good case out of that. I don't look at it the same way- but you made your point. Also, you don't have to do stuff like that at a party to get a guy to be interested in you, actually the opposite will happen, like what happened with the guy in question. He's dropped her like a hot potato. I think this is more about him being an ass for being mad she didn't "put out". That doesn't make her the office gossip... it will make him the office jerk. If that happened where I worked or have previously worked- most people would think the guy was a tool. How does a virgin lose her reputation for making out with someone and saying no to sex? If he has dropped her, it's because HE IS A TOOL who planned on using her... and a pouter for not getting what he wanted.
OpenBook Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 I think he will become the office jerk ONLY if he spreads rumors about her. If he is a gentleman and refuses to discuss it with anyone (which is the way it should be), then everything's cool.
D-Lish Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Where is the OP? I hope she didn't get discouraged:mad:
Posco_Proudfoot Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Where is the OP? I hope she didn't get discouraged:mad: I would've.
Tomcat33 Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Sorry, D-Lish but she did jump into bed with him at the party, and he wanted to have sex with her. That's pretty loose and easy behavior. He didn't have to even take her on a date to get her into bed (whether they had sex or not.) She is young and impressionable, if she follows my advice, she will be all the better for it and have a much more satisfying life relationshipwise. . Oh knock it off, it was a bunch of dunken kids who also happened to be coworkers that ended up sharing a bed because they all crashed at the same house and those two ended up fooling around a bit but the OP said she didn't want to go any further. What's the big deal here? And for the record I am sure she is not super proud of what she did she doesn't need people honing in on that to "help" her. Why are you on this vendetta against this girl, she is prob young and learning things about herself and men. If you really have that much more experience and maturity then lay off and act like an adult, stop with the hyper criticisms and truly offer something of value to this discussion other than gratuitous put-downs.
You'reasian Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 She needs to be reflective on herself and on what she really wants, and how she wants to be viewed by other people. Chances are she probably knows what she wants but instead chooses to play because she thinks its fun. Lots of women like to play games.
BubblyPopcorn Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 I'm not putting anyone down at all. I have been where she is right now a while back! I hope I am giving her confidence and hope because nothing lost here if she follows my advice. But you are putting her down because her behavior is a reflection of your own (or your "past" behavior) and your not comfortable with it and your projecting that onto the OP as a result.
carhill Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t156438/ No comment...
D-Lish Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 She might be playing games, and she is learning the consequences of that. I am not putting her down. I have just lived and learned. Now she can benefit from my experience. If she wants to be viewed as an easy, free girl who guys don't want to take home to introduce to mom but want to take home to their apartment and f**k and ch*ck, then nothing wrong with that! I have no judgments if that is what she wants. However, she is not happy with that or she wouldn't be posting. She put herself in the position to be viewed like that by this guy at the party, I'm not going to put 100% of the blame on him. But she isn't unhappy with what she DID... she is upset he didn't call. I fail to see how NOT sleeping with someone makes them free and easy. Since when is making out but not screwing them being free and easy? She is wondering why he hasn't called... the answer is probably that he only wanted sex, and not a relationship. She didn't even take her clothes off.... She's never had a penis inside her in her life! Bringing a virgin home to mom and dad probably isn't the worst thing a guy can do. It's clear why he didn't call... he only wanted to have sex and he is mad he didn't get any. As far as I am concerned- that makes him unworthy of HER, not the other way around.
carhill Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 I know he's married and I shouldn't care but I'm really attracted to him. If he made a move on me, I would definitely not reject his advances. This young "virgin" is definitely no prude. I think our LS ladies should sit down and have a mother/daughter talk with her. Read her past threads...
carhill Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 TBH, when reading here, my fatherly nature was kicking in. Alcohol, boys and beds don't mix well at that age. Best way to avoid a potentially bad situation is to avoid those situations altogether. As I often heard from my parents, "I don't care what they do down the street; you live here, not down the street, and we don't do those things here." Translation: Just because everyone's "doing it", doesn't make it healthy or right That little saying kept me away from drugs during the height of the drug culture in my otherwise wealthy and drug-filled private high school. Thanks mom and dad Hope the OP still has a mom and dad to look to for advice and support. Oops...forgot the topic....OP, he's ignoring you because you're irrelevant to him. Just something to do at a party. That's how some boys (and men) are.
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