Kikster Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 So, obviously I have had boyfriends before and have dated and whatnot, buuuuuut this guy I have been seeing is a little different and I'm not sure what to think.. A little help please: BACKGROUND: We were introduced through his uncle, who's a Lieutenant and a friend of my mom. He's 26, Sheriff for LAPD, and lives about 40 min-an hour from me. I live in Rancho, he in Irvine. We have gone out three times, kissed once, I mean, like a serious kiss, uhm, he's Cop "cocky", if that makes sense, but I'm just confident, so we are kind of a lot alike, and we are the same sign. Conversation: We probably talk via text about 3, maybe 4 times a week and go out like every other week I guess. Talked on the phone a few times, but we prefer face-to-face. We always have a great time together and he's told me that I am "Sexy and Fun" and that's something a lot of girls don't have. Attitude towards me: Always super sweet, and a gentleman. He does a lot of "inconspicuous" touching... i.e. my hand, my arm, and in the movies, he brushes his hand against mine, but he seems like he's afraid to just take my hand. Recent: Christmas he was at his aunts and he and his uncle came down briefly... We hugged and we all stood around talking, but he was too nervous to kiss me, which I found out later was because our family was RIGHT there... and he felt awkward even attempting as we walked away. He later texted how great it was to see me and how good it felt to hug me. Problem/Concern: The amount of time we see each other isn't weird is it? I don't want to seem totally aggressive, because I think it's adorable IF he's kind of shy when it comes to holding my hand and so forth, but do I just wait. How often should we talk in a week... I mean it's been a month and will TOO much talking and texting bore us... I know it's kind of at that stage for me... Lastly, when we text, sometimes he'll answer the next day, which is fine, buuuuuuuut, it's weird to me.
xpaperxcutx Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 The pace is steady and progressive. You're just impatient and want some hot passionate sex. You could always initiate and " cop" a few touches of your own.
bozwa Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I agree. I think in the beginning of a "relationship" so to speak, or dating, a slow pace can be good, and it's not abnormal. If you want to step it up a little, maybe call a litte more (not like blow up his phone or anything) or call when he least expects it. When you see him, take his hand instead of waiting for him to take your's. He may be relieved when you do this if he is shy about it. It's obvious he's into you. So you should have no fear of rejection. Keep the pace slow, as it seems he may need that, but it's okay to step it up a touch.
WendE Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I completely agree with what the two people said, above. People work at different dating speeds. Consider being proactive and proposing some ideas that might lead to your relationship taking that next step. Maybe you too can go away on a day trip to a romantic spot one weekend? That said, you used the word "weird" several times in your description. The worst relationships makes I made all involved ignoring that inner voice. If you sense something is wrong, maybe that's because it is.
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