Too fast?

[froggyD.]

This is very long, but any personal advice is much appreciated. My first post, thank you.

 

 

So me and this lady friend had added each other on myspace a long while back, and we talked a little just because we went to the same school. Then I started talking to her in school a little, just small talk on myspace, texting, and at school. Just little conversations here and there since August.

I think we both kinda knew our personalities meshed together pretty well; so we inquired one another about hanging out. She insisted that we hang out THAT DAY (only 2 weeks ago), which I was happy about. I'm an introverted person, so when I hang out with someone when I am not comfortable; it tends to be awkward. I was happy to see that she was very talkative and after she picked me up from my house I felt like we had known each other for a long while just because she was very easy to talk to; I admire that a lot. So we went to her house and watched a movie and I found that we ended up pausing the movie every ten minutes just to talk, which as you could probably already guess is strange for me. Though I didn't admit it to myself, I believe I had a small 'baby crush' on her; Moreso just because I thought she was attractive, and I knew she thought the same.

She was talking to me about the Christmas presents she bought which is when I had found out that she had a boyfriend, I strangely found myself disappointed. After the movie we went to a highly elevated spot to look at the city, which was her idea. We had not been 'vibin' each other or anything the whole day, I had no intention of flirting. But when we got there she had kept changing the subject to my past relationships, her past relationships and such. Nothing happend, no flirting or anything. But I got a few very subtle hints; enough to keep me thinking about it all night.

 

We texted a few times, where she would flirt with me, then I would flirt back, then she would push me away. Now that I look back on it I think her though process was to flirt because we both had the 'feeling' about each other, then realize she has a boyfriend when I flirt back, then push away.

 

 

We hung out about a week later, when I had finally admitted to myself that I had this.. I guess you could say I had a feeling about her, that I liked her? I don't know, just a feeling. But I was very unsure whether it was mutual or not; but I wan't stressing, I didn't see it as a big deal. We got french fries and went to her house for awhile, but it was different than the last time we had hung out; there was a growing discomfort between the two of us. I now think that it may have been because we had both decided that we had both liked one another, and it somehow brought awkwardness to our situation? I don't know.

So it was awkward while we ate and were at her house, until we went to a park, where we proceeded to flirt a lot. But I noticed the same 'pushing away' thing I talked about earlier. I didn't sweat it, I just didn't flirt back until she stopped pushing me away. We went to another park and it was dark by then, we were flirting a lot and she let me flirt and all. I started getting the vibes that she wanted me to kiss her, for about an hour it steadily got more intense. I had no intention of kissing her, I felt that would put unfair pressure on her since she had a boyfriend and all. But it got incredibly intense, we were in her car because it was too cold outside, and she I would find her getting very close to my face, so close that our noses were touching, she would stare at my eyes, and look at my lips, bite hers. VERY OBVIOUS HINTS.

 

Once again, I had no intention of kissing her (though I had fully decided I liked her), I almost decided to speak up, but I held back. We went into her backseat to draw on the steam in her back window and she got a blanket from her trunk and she got under it and laid in my lap. I continued to ignore her hints to have me make a move. She would occasionly raise up to draw something on the window, so she would be straddling me and staring at my lips. I wanted to speak up very badly.

She was in her straddling position and I was drawing something on the window, She said something really quiet and I turned around to ask what she said only to have her kiss me. She sat back and we just looked at each other for awhile, I guess I was giving her a strange look because she said "Just throwing that out there, but I guess not". I started to make out with her, my immediate reaction was obviously hapiness.

I stopped after a little while and said, "don't you have a boyfriend" and she said "yes, but I like you".

I said "are you planning on telling him?" and she said she was not sure yet.

I accepted her decision and we kissed some more, cuddled a lot, and that same comfort between us had started again. We laid there with each other for over two hours, just talking, kissing and such. She said to not judge her for what she was doing, I said I understand, and that she would not be judged. Then she put her head in her hand and said, "AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH", I asked what was wrong and she said I'm making out with a boy I barely know in the backseat of my car, and I have a boyfriend.

 

I'm hanging out with her again tomorrow.. And I want advice on whether I should act like I had in the later portions of that night or what? Just personal opions would be fine.

Do you think this went too fast?

Any advice on the situation would be very much appreciated, thank you.

[GoneButNotForgotten]

Well I personally only see three situations.

 

A) Her relationship was already failing before you came along and she jumped to you as a life saver. At this point though you still need a final decision. Time to **** or get off the pot.

 

B) The grass is greener on the other side. Some people get antsy when they get into a committed relationship and start looking at life with another person as automatically being better. Some people also only really enjoy the new relationship feeling. New relationships have a nice new feeling and some people get really attached to that feeling of something new and exploring the new relationship. I have no real advise on how to hand a woman like that.

 

C) She is the type of girl that can cheat. Some people are cheaters and it is just a way with them. If this is her type getting into a relationship with her will not be good for you in the long run.