Ross PK Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I'b be happy to be with a girl like that, although I'm not sure if most guys would.
Yamaha Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 She is smart, hot, pretty funny, and, though quiet, could hold up an end of the conversation pretty interestingly, with lots of surprises. Being hot only lasts so long so she better have a interesting personality. Having few friends wouldn't be a big thing as long as we connected but being stoned alot would be a deal breaker.
kashmir Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I'd prefer a girl who's a loner to a girl who has a ton of friends. If she's pretty and smart, that makes her even better. I just get the feelings not many of these girls exist. I'm a bit of a loner myself. I have friends and all, but I'm much more solitary than others are. If I found a girl who had that essence of a loner, that would instantly be something we had in common. I know this is a weird movie to reference in the context of relationships and happiness, but I've always felt so good about the relationship in Donnie Darko. Cute new girl and a cute but off beat guy who's mind is always racing. Both are loners and both have problems, but they find love together.
shadowplay Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 Wow, I'm pleasantly surprised by the responses to this thread. I remember posting a question awhile ago about whether men prefer super extroverted, bubbly women and getting basically flamed for singing the virtues of shyer/less social girls. My ex boyfriend was constantly criticizing me for not being naturally social and outgoing enough (even though I made an effort to be friendly to his friends and family), and it really got on my nerves. Ugh. Good to know there are men who appreciate women like us.
Author spookie Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 I'm surprised as well. I've always thought guys were drawn to the outgoing, bubbly types.
Posco_Proudfoot Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 From my personality, which is more introverted, I'm usually attracted to someone more extroverted. My last gf was this same way. She gave me a lot of energy. She was also somewhat of a loner ie didn't like going out and doing things. She was definitely a homebody. I would much rather perfer this type of person over an outgoing bubbly on the go all the time type of girl.
kashmir Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I remember one time at this halloween party, two girls in particular caught my eye. One was a really hot blond. She was really partying it up...dressed in her slutty cat costume and laughing and giggling with all her friends. The second one was this really cute girl who was standing with one or two other people the entire time and wasn't saying much. She looked really shy. I only ended up approaching one, and guess which one it was? It was the outgoing girl, but not because I was more attracted to her. She was easy to talk to. It was the other one that I really wanted to say something to, but she looked so unapproachable. I admit, I lacked a bit of balls, and I regret it now!
RichGuy Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 I admit, I lacked a bit of balls Wow, that's a shocker!!... ...NOT!!!!!
kashmir Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Wow, that's a shocker!!... ...NOT!!!!! Wow, you really have no freakin life, do you?
El Scorpio Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 She is smart, hot, pretty funny, and, though quiet, could hold up an end of the conversation pretty interestingly, with lots of surprises. She just chooses not to have friends. But you're special, and she wants to be with you. She's not too clingy. Less clingy than average. I know I'd be ok with the male version of the above. But do most guys expect girls to be social? Does it count against you if you're not? Definitely. I'm the male version ("hot" is subjective ) but I found a female version of this too, we dated last year until recently, but had nothing to do with topic of this post.. as far as the "loner" aspects it was simply too good. It's like going through life with 4 arms and one day meeting another person with 4 arms. It's beautiful. It was.. almost.. surreal. To have someone actually want all those traits that for years I feel I have to hide, or fake.. it's a breath of fresh air and liberating. Total freedom to be who you are. I'd totally date u ;P There's different kinds of loners.. you're obviously the good kind.. just watch out for the bad kinds.. but that's easy to tell. Find an artsy guy.. take art classes, you'll find tons of them. Move to LA and become an artsy cool weird loner chick, and maybe we'll run into each other one day
kizik Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 From my personality, which is more introverted, I'm usually attracted to someone more extroverted. My last gf was this same way. She gave me a lot of energy. She was also somewhat of a loner ie didn't like going out and doing things. She was definitely a homebody. I would much rather perfer this type of person over an outgoing bubbly on the go all the time type of girl. I just want to point out that I am a loner and outgoing. How can this be, you ask? I dunno, maybe nobody likes me. Think of me as Michael Scott from "The Office". My point is that loner-ness and extroversion are not mutually exclusive. As far as a loner girl (BTW loner is a reaaally negative term), she'd need to be a loner out of circumstance or choice, not b/c everyone hates her (much like they hate me).
kizik Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 She just chooses not to have friends. Why would you "choose" not to have friends? Friends are great, they give you rides in cars, you can borrow money from them... seriously, how can one live without friends?!?! and don't pretend this thread is not about you.
zenith Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Wow, you really have no freakin life, do you? but he is rich, bro
Posco_Proudfoot Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 I just want to point out that I am a loner and outgoing. How can this be, you ask? I dunno, maybe nobody likes me. Think of me as Michael Scott from "The Office". My point is that loner-ness and extroversion are not mutually exclusive. As far as a loner girl (BTW loner is a reaaally negative term), she'd need to be a loner out of circumstance or choice, not b/c everyone hates her (much like they hate me). All very true. She actually wasn't what I consider a loner. She just preferred to not be around a lot of people, liked reading, didn't liked talking on the phone. As oppossed to me, an introvert that prefers being around people but somehow currently doesn't. Not many friends. A very bad mix.
Author spookie Posted January 1, 2009 Author Posted January 1, 2009 Why would you "choose" not to have friends? Friends are great, they give you rides in cars, you can borrow money from them... seriously, how can one live without friends?!?! and don't pretend this thread is not about you. It's about me. I'm "choosing" because I feel stretched thin, like I need to look for my center for awhile; and also becuase I prefer nerdy, solitary activities over ones involving other people. But I feel like that'd be a turnoff. For example, it's New Year's Eve, and in lieu of attending a party like a normal person, I followed my heart and went rock climbing and came back at 12:30 to clean.
BlueEyedGirl Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Why would you "choose" not to have friends? Friends are great, they give you rides in cars, you can borrow money from them... seriously, how can one live without friends?!?! and don't pretend this thread is not about you. Why is it so hard to beleive that someone can choose not to have friends? I am a loner by choice. I ended up going to NYE party because I felt that's what a "normal" person would do even though I longed to stay home. I had a sh$t time and got home at 1am - I found everyone there annoying and draining. I prefer my own company to most other people's. Even when I try to have a friend, I start finding him/her too clingy in no time. They call too much, want me to do things too often and I start running out of excuses quickly enough.
rod_in_gtown Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 I'd be fine with a loner as long as she understands that I'm not. I have friends, very good friends and I make it a point to help them if they ask, doing things for other people is actually a good thing in my book so if you're not competing for attention with them then it's all groovy. I'm a really noble and honest guy so when I'm with someone I don't go out and try to be with someone else. I don't need/want a jealous person in my life.
Walk Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Why would you "choose" not to have friends? Friends are great, they give you rides in cars, you can borrow money from them... seriously, how can one live without friends?!?! and don't pretend this thread is not about you. My experience with friends is they bum rides from you, borrow my money and "forget" to repay, conviently call 2 weeks before their bday party (Gifts!) to invite you then disappear when it's your bday. etc. etc. etc.
JoeNewbie Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 I personally can't stand girls who cram up their schedule with so many activities that they're always stressed out and busy. I'm a calm guy who likes the company of calm women. Between the party animal and the introvert, I'd definitely go with the introvert. That being said, there are several degrees of being a loner. Some people won't get attached to anyone for some reason. That is as much of a problem (if not more) as someone who is too clingy. I like a girl who takes the time to enjoy life, who has a good balance of "alone time" versus "time spent with friends" and enjoys a quiet evening at home from time to time.
2sunny Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 i agree that the term loner can be negative in its' use. a similar concept which i resemble more is that i tend to be solitary when given the choice. in my own solitude i am productive when alone. just because i'm alone doesn't mean i'm lonely or unmotivated or unproductive. also, when i do socialize - it tends to be in large groups of people i know well. i enjoy it while i'm there - but the chaos tends to get to me after a while and i retreat back to my own happy, safe solitude. so, i am a combination of social (limited by healthy boundaries) and solitude (my productive time).
monkey00 Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 I would be. although she may not have friends, I wouldn't want her to be clingy or at least have her own activities/interests outside the relationship. She has to keep in mind I too have my own life, and I'd happily include her in it - but I won't give it up for her.
johan Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 I would be. although she may not have friends, I wouldn't want her to be clingy or at least have her own activities/interests outside the relationship. She has to keep in mind I too have my own life, and I'd happily include her in it - but I won't give it up for her. Depends how hot she is though, doesn't it?
monkey00 Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Depends how hot she is though, doesn't it? I think it might. Who knows what's going to happen if I do wind up in a LTR. I have friends who gave up their friends and their lives just to be with their SO. In some ways it's sad, but it's a part of life.
Recommended Posts