blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 my ex just sent me a text that says "happy early new year" i was so shocked and effed up. at 2 in the morning. she posted a bulliten on myspace saying new pics, and i had to see. that afternoon i looked I found out that the pics were her and 2 other friends and 3 guys. I was crushed, and deeply saddened, and confused because she told me the reason we broke up is because she didn't want a boyfriend and that was just 2 months ago. and we've talked a lot in between. But i don't know who the guy is, they were sitting close together, and anyway i was just crushed. But happily this girl i've been talking to texted me saying "good morning sunshine!" :] It's been almost a week since we last talked. i don't know if i should reply, because i just don't know whats right. Sometimes something good comes out of breaking NC other times, it's bad. I just wish i was pointed at what's right, i keep praying to be shown the light but i don't know yet :/
starzphalling Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 ok..after reading through all these posts, and dealing with my own stuff i have come to one solid conclusion. MYSPACE AND FACEBOOK ARE THE DEVIL!!! that is all for now.
Riffmeister General Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I know exactly what you mean. I want to be given a list of things I have to do and things I shouldn't, so I know it's the right path. How much of you being crushed when you saw the photos was you feeling lied to, rather than you can't stand the sight of her being with someone else? It's difficult to untangle those feelings, I know. You're right, sometimes good things do some out of breaking NC, but you never know until it's too late, so is it worth the risk? What do you want out of it? So you can get back with her? If so, then that's a BIG ask, and carries the highest penalty for failure, so bear that in mind before you make a decision.
Riffmeister General Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 ok..after reading through all these posts, and dealing with my own stuff i have come to one solid conclusion. MYSPACE AND FACEBOOK ARE THE DEVIL!!! that is all for now. Lol! Agreed! We'll banish them to the Orwellian Nightmare of Room 101... mwahahahahahahaha *cough, splutter, fall down*
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 I know exactly what you mean. I want to be given a list of things I have to do and things I shouldn't, so I know it's the right path. How much of you being crushed when you saw the photos was you feeling lied to, rather than you can't stand the sight of her being with someone else? It's difficult to untangle those feelings, I know. You're right, sometimes good things do some out of breaking NC, but you never know until it's too late, so is it worth the risk? What do you want out of it? So you can get back with her? If so, then that's a BIG ask, and carries the highest penalty for failure, so bear that in mind before you make a decision. it sucks, last time i broke it we ended up having a sweet nice convorsation with which she told me she loved me and all that. but then she said things went to far, which completely crushed me But i don't think she realizes that i'm giving her a taste of me not being in her life anymore. part of me wants to say "Are you liking me not being in your life, you seem to if your gonna go out with guys and come in at 2 AM" I think i might delete my myspace, or have someone change the password for a while, i need a break from it. and i'll be let free.
Hersheys Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 my ex just sent me a text that says "happy early new year" i was so shocked and effed up. at 2 in the morning. she posted a bulliten on myspace saying new pics, and i had to see. that afternoon i looked I found out that the pics were her and 2 other friends and 3 guys. I was crushed, and deeply saddened, and confused because she told me the reason we broke up is because she didn't want a boyfriend and that was just 2 months ago. and we've talked a lot in between. But i don't know who the guy is, they were sitting close together, and anyway i was just crushed. But happily this girl i've been talking to texted me saying "good morning sunshine!" :] It's been almost a week since we last talked. i don't know if i should reply, because i just don't know whats right. Sometimes something good comes out of breaking NC other times, it's bad. I just wish i was pointed at what's right, i keep praying to be shown the light but i don't know yet :/ She wants a reaction from you. See if the pictures will have an effect on you. Games. Keep up with the NC and it's normal to break it from time to time so don't beat yourself up about it. It's best not knowing anything about the ex so for now, forget myspace, facebook. Those things will only make you feel worse.
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 It just sucks, i thought about her a lot today after seeing the pictures. I listened to Pearl Jam's song Black, which tells basically of my situation and i got so teary eyed when i listened to Last kiss, which is prolly the saddest song ever. I just wish i never met her sometimes, I shared a lot of first things with her. And i want to forget about them, but it's **** she does that i can't. She's in my chemistry class and i end up skipping it to avoid her. I really wish God would point me in the right direction. I wish he'd read the threads on the site haha!
GoneButNotForgotten Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 "Give them nothing, but take from them: EVERYTHING!" King Leonidus- 300 Tough it up. Don't give her the satisfaction of making it easier to got over you. It will just make it harder for you.
Riffmeister General Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 part of me wants to say "Are you liking me not being in your life?" I think i might delete my myspace, or have someone change the password for a while, i need a break from it. and i'll be let free. Wow, that's a good mantra to keep up NC! See how she copes after seemingly completely devoting herself to me for so long. I know she doesn't cos she pleaded with me in her final email to still be friends with her... hmm, we'll see! I deleted her from my Facebook, but can't delete her from the Myspace cos it's the band's Myspace, so I'll always be tempted to look. I know I shouldn't...
not_a_happy_camper Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I absolutely agree with everyone saying facebook, myspace, bebo, are all evil when it comes to break ups! Best thing i've done so far is delete my ex off mine. I know he was looking at my page. i was looking at his all the time. yeah i want to know what he's up to. who he's hanging out with, etc. but is it going to make me feel good? not at all! Delete, block now! if it hurts them, let it. They'll see your actions don't count to you anymore.
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 i deleted her 3 times and she keeps flipping out on me, i just don't want to deal with the drama, i just need a break from it. I got a myspace tracker and timed out the times i'd get a view to when she was online, and when she sent a message She viewed it 77 times in the month of december, 7 times today. prolly to see if i viewed her new pictures right? I'm still on her top, and our trip to block island photo album is still there. So i have no idea whats up. I'm just really sad right now, i thank you all for replying to help me through this, God bless all of you, i look forward to helping you all out too! she just sent me a message saying "hey well you see i would text you but u dont respond.." i think i'm trapped now since it says read. What the **** gives her the right to message me, after what she did, after the ****ing album she posted, i responded saying i just want to sleep. I hope the best to her new jew fro bastard kid that prolly wants her just for sex, something i never even asked her for.
Riffmeister General Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 AAGGHH!! I just looked. Stupid, I know. You put the bloody idea in my head though! She doesn't use MySpace much anymore, and she's still got the Canadian flag as her profile pic (she was visiting me in Canada from the UK; quite a cute gesture I remember thinking) and 'excited' as her mood. And people ask why I was so shocked...?!?!?! I guess i wanted to see she'd changed her profile to 'Single' rather than 'In a Relationship' (with this other guy she told me nothing would happen with).
hereandnow Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 Thank God I'm not on myspace or facebook. They are pure evil. Don't play those games! Tracking when she's viewed is just buying into it.
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 why do you think she views it so much? why did she message me.
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 i broke contact, now we're talking, i'm such a ****. she told me she just hung out with some friends, and that she'll prolly never see the guy again that's why they cuddled right? i don't know what to do. i never get anything right, i think that breaking it will be good.
starzphalling Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 i kinda want to know how old she is, but beyond that. she's playing with you. girls do this evil thing where they start telling you everything on their mind with no regard for how you are going to interpret it, just because sometimes we can't shut up. and no girl will every turn down a chance to be wanted, unless they're really creepy. so when you talk to her and answer her, you are validating her "im so important, look everyone will talk to me" outlook. even if we dump you we still want the satisfaction of knowing you want us, yeah i know.... pure evil....but we are, sorry. imo don't tell her you want to sleep, tell her that you can't talk to her right now. not because you have lost the ability to speak, but because you shouldn't have to hurt yourself, just so that she can feel good about telling you random stories about her day while sitting on her bed doing her nails. she's prolly had the same conversation with three other people tonight. you do not have to give her the power to hurt you, you are in control of that, you don't talk to her, she can't hurt you anymore. you do talk to her, you let her take that knife out and stab you a few more times.
Riffmeister General Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 yeah i know.... pure evil....but we are, sorry. I KNEW IT!! Dude, we all have moments of weakness, it's completely natural (I did earlier). But don't beat yourself up about it. Think of it this way. When I go out for a round of golf (ok, I sound ancient don't I, but I'm only 26!) before I even hit a ball, I say to myself "Right, I'm going to allow myself 10 bad shots this round." When I hit one, it's just one off the list, I'm not allowed to get mad at myself for any reason, it's just one off the list, it was expected, get over it and grab the sand iron/rake/lake ball retriever/call the fire department. You can do that too. You can try really hard to go a month NC, but allow yourself, say, 3 lapses in that month. Don't plan them, don't actually mean to carry them out (why would you deliberately hit a terrible shot?!), just know that you have 3 lives. That way, it takes the pressure off you, you can feel proud of yourself when you reach the end of the month and you've not lapsed once, but most importantly, it stops you getting mad at yourself. This is the time to be the most positive we can be with ourselves, so getting mad isn't helping. You don't need another person on your back!
surviving you Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 I got a myspace tracker . sorry to steal attention from the topic, but how do I get one of these mythical devices? does it work ? or will it just hack my acount?
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 i kinda want to know how old she is, but beyond that. she's playing with you. girls do this evil thing where they start telling you everything on their mind with no regard for how you are going to interpret it, just because sometimes we can't shut up. and no girl will every turn down a chance to be wanted, unless they're really creepy. so when you talk to her and answer her, you are validating her "im so important, look everyone will talk to me" outlook. even if we dump you we still want the satisfaction of knowing you want us, yeah i know.... pure evil....but we are, sorry. imo don't tell her you want to sleep, tell her that you can't talk to her right now. not because you have lost the ability to speak, but because you shouldn't have to hurt yourself, just so that she can feel good about telling you random stories about her day while sitting on her bed doing her nails. she's prolly had the same conversation with three other people tonight. you do not have to give her the power to hurt you, you are in control of that, you don't talk to her, she can't hurt you anymore. you do talk to her, you let her take that knife out and stab you a few more times. Thank you so much, i never implement the contact, she does. but i have to work on not replying :/
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 sorry to steal attention from the topic, but how do I get one of these mythical devices? does it work ? or will it just hack my acount? haha, they don't really work that well, it doesn't show you who views it, only the people that have the same tracker. I don't recommend getting one because as if myspace isn't difficult enough. But she viewed it 78 times in the month of december! Sometimes that makes me feel good, other times a little stalked lol. But i had to time it out from when she was online, like everytime i got a view, i'd check and she'd be online. And whenever she sent a message, i'd check i got a view from her. I don't know, it sometimes makes me feel good to know she checks it so many times. But i told you guys that she said that she prolly won't even see the guy again. I don't know what to think about that, because they were close. and she walks in at 230AM?
xpaperxcutx Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 As a girl I apologize for our behaviour towards you men. But you're not emotionally detached yet, and she knows it. She doesn't want to be with you but she will keep you around to satisfy her own self importance. PLEASE avoid her. Just give her the cold shoulder. You'll notice that she'll keep stalking you and contacting you. Of course, then she'll feel even worse because you're not talking to her. That way you're giving her a taste of her own medicine.
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 It sucks, i don't want to believe what i'm hearing because she's such a sweet girl and that's why i fell in love with her. But it's probebly true, I really wish i didn't see those pictures because i was doing so good. I was talking to this new girl and everything. I think yesterday was the worst day i had in a while, i kept listening to sad songs and i remember saying "ahh Come onn" when i went into the closet to get a plate and tears came out of no where. That always sucks. Along with waking up in the middle of the night and your just like ughhhhhhh. Today isn't so great but i'm hanging out with my good friend and i'm gonna get my hands on some booze. And i barely drink it's for new years don't judge lol. I'm trying to make this year about me, and improving me. But our anniversery is feb 20th and that day is gonna suckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk She's 17 btw i'm 16 I know i'm young but i'd like to believe that all love hurts when it ends regardless of age, and that's why theres a community here
OneTwo Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 Dude, time to man up. Stop enabling her, and stop being a pussy. She texts you and keeps stringing you along for 2 reasons: 1. She likes the attention and likes to keep you on the back burner to use as she pleases when she needs a little ego boost. After all, you always reply to her eventually (for those of you who do not know what this is called, IT IS CALLED BEING USED). 2. Because she can -- you allow it. You need to move on and find someone else. Let the situation with her work itself out. In the mean time, focus on yourself and make sure that you are having a good time. Who cares what she does? Do you think she cares what you are doing? Stop stalking her on myspace or facebook or whatever. Use the time that you are spending online tracking her to better yourself. Workout, or read a book, or do something -- anything but worry about her. There are millions (actually, billions) or women out there. Find one that will treat you right, not one that uses you to make herself feel good. How selfish that? You deserve better.
Author blackrider27 Posted December 31, 2008 Author Posted December 31, 2008 lol i think you misinterpreted my situation I'm not sulking around the house as i once did when this first happened, I'm occupying my time a lot, but i'm saying that i have better days and worse days. And on those worse days is when i look on the site and i feel a lot better. Loveshack helped me stop feeling sorry for myself because i realized that the millions of people that go through break ups are worse then mine. But i just posted because i want to contact her and i tried to fight the urge and failed. And now i know that i have to keep trying if i want to be happy.
EmperorR Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 Whenever a women tells you she wants to be Alone it's a lie. And ya facebook/my space are re devils that's how I found out my ex was dating someone new.
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