mel21 Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 Hi all, I was looking for some second opinions about my situation. I dated someone for 2 years, then for a few reasons, we became off and on after that for about 2 years. We started as best friends and it always felt like something special was there - you know, that sort of 'connection' between two people. Anyway, we split in August this year, and he is now with someone else. Recently he told me out of no where (because we have not talked since then) that he loves me, he thinks about me every day, he can't believe he is living a life without the one he loves, that he's sorry and wishes things weren't this way. I'm wondering if this is just a selfish act, because he does have a gf, or if it's him reaching out trying to explain his love? And also, how do you respond to this type of thing? let it go and move on, or should we talk?
saturnfell Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 Hi, In my opinion, it takes time for people to realize what they had and how they truly feel. Since your split, this may have been the time he needed to realize what he wanted from the relationship the two of you had. Regardless of his current situation, his feelings are what you need to take a look at. People date other people all the time and realize they aren't meant to be. Happens everyday! What would you like? Do you still care for this man? Is the bond the two of you shared strong enough to enter back in and take things slow (you would be best taking things slow) Have you seen him since the split? Oh, and FYI... he needs to end his current situation if you were going to decide to enter back in. There is no "trial and error" period for him. That's completely unacceptable.
LikeCharlotte Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 You can talk to him but you need to make it clear that he should not be saying those things while he has a gf. I would not consider someone who would treat someone they are with in that way. I understand that he may have learned and believes he loves you. That comes with an honest belief that you are right for him above other people he has been with. If that is the case then why does he have a gf that does not measure up in his mind?
lofi_tokyo Posted December 29, 2008 Posted December 29, 2008 You can talk to him but you need to make it clear that he should not be saying those things while he has a gf. I would not consider someone who would treat someone they are with in that way. I understand that he may have learned and believes he loves you. That comes with an honest belief that you are right for him above other people he has been with. If that is the case then why does he have a gf that does not measure up in his mind? I completely agree with this post. Its very possible for one to realize they met the "right one" a while ago, after dating other people and honestly feeling what they once had was special. However, I think if he was really devoted to that feeling, he would not be dating another girl, he'd end things and be working on getting you back!! So to answer your question: Does he mean it? Believe it when hes back with you. Actions speak louder than words.
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