Tinkerbelll Posted December 27, 2008 Posted December 27, 2008 Ok then guys..you were with me when he dumped me. He disappeared from my life, he didn't even took the time to answer my texts or calls. I spent more than 45 days doing NC, asking God to bring him back, and to make me feel better. I struggled every single fu*** day from that day. I suffered when I was told he was spotted with another girl. I felt so bad knowing he's hanging out with a friend of mine I intruduced him to. I felt unbearable pain..but I never cried, never loose hope that I would find a way. I focused always on the positive, even when I felt I was loosing control on everything: to become stronger became my ultimate goal. When I run into him on Xmas Eve, at a bar where I was with some friends, I felt I was going to fall in the ground. I made my way to the toilette, in order to get control again. I looked at myself in the mirror, and I saw me, more beautiful then ever..and I remembered what I promised myself when he dumped me"I'll be elegant in my sorrow, and I will be prettier because I'll take care better of myself in order to face this challenge properly". I got back to my friends, he saw me and smiled at me: I got closer to him and talk BS for a minute, then I said hallo and went away. From that moment, I could feel his eyes on me all the evening.. He eventually got closer to me saying how beautiful I was, to call him etc.. I was fine, I just didn't get intimate with him and kept the conversation very light..I run away as soon as I could. Today, I run again into him. He offered to drive me at a friend' s place and I finally got my closure. I told him I am fine now, and that I knew that if we really wanted to stay together, things would have gone in a different way. I AGREED WE WEREN'T MEANT TO BE TOGETHER. I thanked him for driving me there and went out from the car. I smiled all the time. Ten minutes later he texted me:" Good to see you again and talk to you..Wish you a special NYE.Kiss." I didn't replay. The ball is in my court now. Thank you everybody, you don't know how much you helped me through this difficult journey. Stay strong: you can't imagine how much we are gaining in terms of self improvement when sh** happens. Lov u
sultry33 Posted December 27, 2008 Posted December 27, 2008 good for you tinkerbell:D must have been really tough seeing him but you did great taking care of yourself is the way to go and keep that ball in your court i always look back on my life and see that everything happens for a reason even if you dont see it at the time happy holidays to you x
Author Tinkerbelll Posted December 27, 2008 Author Posted December 27, 2008 Somehow, things are going exactly as I wanted to be.. Of course, it would be even better if he just asked me to get back together bit it's ok: I can wait. And in the mean time, having fun the best I can Cheers!
4by4 Posted December 27, 2008 Posted December 27, 2008 You should be real proud of yourself Tinkerbell. Going NC is difficult and it must have been so hard putting on a straight face in front of him. Be independent, be yourself, love yourself and keep the positivity. Remember you are a catch and should never be taken granted for. Even if your ex never sees it, someone else will! Good luck.
Author Tinkerbelll Posted December 28, 2008 Author Posted December 28, 2008 You should be real proud of yourself Tinkerbell. Going NC is difficult and it must have been so hard putting on a straight face in front of him. Be independent, be yourself, love yourself and keep the positivity. Remember you are a catch and should never be taken granted for. Even if your ex never sees it, someone else will! Good luck. It has been difficult, I was with him and I just wanted to ask him to give another try..but I didn't. I said me he didn't miss me, since he's the kind of person that doesn't have feelings. I said him that I miss him like hell, but that I discovered inside me a strenght I would never imagine I had. I also had the feeling that everything he did to me, not answering my calls,hang out with another girl, date my friend etc.. was made intentionally, with the aim of hurting me the deepest he could. And you know what? I promised myself that I would no longer stand this kind of attitude. I wrote on my journal:"I came home under the sun, it's over".
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