hurtnconfused2 Posted December 26, 2008 Posted December 26, 2008 Hi all, here is my story. First of let me begin by explaining that two years ago at Christmas my now ex-husband left me for his ex. God that was a hard time. Fast forward to yesterday, I met a man two months ago who broke all those "proverbial walls" down. He made me feel emotions that I thought had long died. Christmas Eve I noticed a change in him, he told me his ex-girlfriend who had cheated on him with another woman (I know sounding like a bad script from a soap) had approached him at work and told him she was miserable without him, professed her undying love for him and basically turned his world upside down. He's confused upset etc. I'm thinking oh hell not again and not on Christmas. Christmas morning we exchange gifts, he gives me a laptop, diamond necklace, clothes etc. We then break up. I know he has to follow his heart, and would never want anyone to not do that. But I told him the reason she is now back feeling sorry for her actions is because he is no longer single which changes things. Some want what they can't have. I've been down this road before, if it didn't work for them back then and they had broken up and gotten back together several times what is going to change? Nothing, oh things will be wonderful for the first little bit. So I've gone from having a man tell me people have said this is the happiest time they have ever seen him since he's been with me. A man who not only 5 days ago told me I was everything he could ever have hoped for and asking me to have faith in him, to this. "sorry I hurt you, but I have to see where it goes with her" Help folks because this is the second Christmas I've spent alone because of an ex and to be honest I don't have the courage to try again.
MWH Posted December 26, 2008 Posted December 26, 2008 Wow. I'm feeling your pain and despair here. *hug* Not to really stick up for a wishy-washy chump like him but at least he verbalized his stupidity to you and did not leave you guessing. I'm that brings you little to no comfort whatsoever though... You sond like a very sound-minded person and you sound like a very hurt nd depressed person as well. Having the rug pulled out from under you like he did, especially at this time of year, is devestating indeed. It is, however, better to discover his weak ness of character now rather than later when you would be even more deeply committed. Hard to see the good in that right now but count your blessings... Probably best that you cut your losses now and move forward through your grief and leave him in the dust. As I said you sound really solid and understanding. That makes you a "catch" in any GOOD man's eyes. You wrote off last Christmas and now you have write this one off too. so be it. I've had to do the exact same thing. Know this: The problem does NOT lie with you- it lies with him and his weak, selfish, and cowardly character. I would think twice about getting involved with this fool again in the future. don't make the mistakes I've made and go back with someone who is alwlays looking for greener grass on the other side of the fence. YOU are worth much more than that. Peace, MWH
stillafool Posted December 26, 2008 Posted December 26, 2008 Hi all, here is my story. First of let me begin by explaining that two years ago at Christmas my now ex-husband left me for his ex. God that was a hard time. Fast forward to yesterday, I met a man two months ago who broke all those "proverbial walls" down. He made me feel emotions that I thought had long died. Christmas Eve I noticed a change in him, he told me his ex-girlfriend who had cheated on him with another woman (I know sounding like a bad script from a soap) had approached him at work and told him she was miserable without him, professed her undying love for him and basically turned his world upside down. He's confused upset etc. I'm thinking oh hell not again and not on Christmas. Christmas morning we exchange gifts, he gives me a laptop, diamond necklace, clothes etc. We then break up. He probably gave you all of this out of guilt. I know he has to follow his heart, and would never want anyone to not do that. But I told him the reason she is now back feeling sorry for her actions is because he is no longer single which changes things. Some want what they can't have. I've been down this road before, if it didn't work for them back then and they had broken up and gotten back together several times what is going to change? Nothing, oh things will be wonderful for the first little bit. You're right. Him having someone new brought out the feelings she still had for him. He must still love her or he wouldn't take her back. Don't be angry with her (and I know this is hard). Wouldn't you rather know now that he isn't over her than later. Also at least he didn't cheat on you with her he told you the truth. Don't worry because the person you are meant to be with is still out there. So I've gone from having a man tell me people have said this is the happiest time they have ever seen him since he's been with me. A man who not only 5 days ago told me I was everything he could ever have hoped for and asking me to have faith in him, to this. "sorry I hurt you, but I have to see where it goes with her" Help folks because this is the second Christmas I've spent alone because of an ex and to be honest I don't have the courage to try again. Is your ex h and his ex still together or did they break up?
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