Jdancer21 Posted December 26, 2008 Posted December 26, 2008 Hello. First of all I want to wish everyone a MERRY XMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR. I've gotten to the point in my life where I tend to shy away from asking people how I should live my life, but I need some advice or just maybe some insight. At some point in my life, I want to be settled with someone, or at least I think I do (Now that I think about this, I kinda wonder if I really want someone or if I just want someone just so I can feel i'm ok.) Either way it's been bothering me that I'm single to the point where i'm always thinking about it *How can I change? * What did I do wrong? *Was it something I said. and for the most part everyone that i've talked about this has always said You need to do this, you need to do this you need to do this and basically the vibe that I always got from this is " Just being yourself isn't good enough". This year I've been doing alot of thinking, thinking about how I wasted my time trying to figure out "Why this person dump me?" or planning what I need to wear and getting rehearsing how I would sit in front of the mirror oh maybe 5 days BEFORE the first date. I think about how much of that energy I could've spent on the things I do well such as my singing and dancing. Forgive me If saying this very conceited but I have way too much potential as a singer and dancer to be wasting opportunities b/c i'm too busy trying to figure out yet ANOTHER diet plan to make myself look more presentable. So i've decided to put dating on hold for a good while until i have a good grasp on who I am and until I have some sort of career in what I do. I've told this to people and they thought I was absolutely CRAZY!! Am I? The way I see it is this: The best gift that I can give to the world is a healthy me, Mentally, spiritually, physically, and definitely emotionally and lord knows there have been many a day where my mood shift DRAMATICALLY if date #1 doesn't call and 2 days after he calls back. I'm tired than that. I would like to think i'm more than what 1 guy thinks. I will be auditioning for schools and i'm in the point in my life where i'm building my future, I don't have time to try to mold into somebody else, then again.. I am the only one putting that pressure on me come to think of it. See, this is the type of stuff I need to be figuring out. Yes, I would LOVE a partner I would love to have someone to take to Xmas dinner. It's not like I'm saying I don't want to date and to look for that person but at this stage of my life THAT'S NOT THE MAIN CONCERN OF MY LIFE RIGHT NOW!. Though I know that, it doesn't change that sometimes I feel lonely. I'm starting to grasp the idea that *GASP* there is the possibility of being happy as single. I'm thinking about doing new hobbies and going back in to dance next year. Going back to ballet and ballroom and then REALLY getting cracking on my singing. Really just diving into things I enjoy and taking care of me. I'm only 23, I've got my whole life ahead of me to find someone and if I'm as attractive as everyone seems to think I am, Then I won't have a hard time finding someone, whether be online or someone in the audience. It works for me... What do you think?
kizik Posted December 26, 2008 Posted December 26, 2008 I think that you've got a great attitude and some excellent insight into yourself as well as others. If you like yourself - don't change. No matter what anyone tells you. Anyway, you're a 23 year old woman, you should have no problem finding one of the many men who hits on you, as someone who is compatible. In the meantime, you are doing great.
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