audrey_1 Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 Last real email I got from him was a week ago, asking me for my address. He wanted to send me a Christmas gift. I wasn't sure why he would want to do this since he is seeing someone else, and we discussed that my feelings were stronger for him, and we needed to back away from each other, since he didn't feel the same way. The cliche casual relationship where the scales get tipped, and I'm the one on the low end. And it was LDR, and who he's seeing now is local. Specifically he said "he cared about me very much, as I had become an important part of his life, but his feelings simply didn't run as deep for me as mine for him." I told him I would just need to think about it; he sent me an email saying He understood, that he forgot about leaving me alone, and that he promised he wasn't doing it on purpose. So I began LC. Since then, we had a brief email exchange about the NFL. His team is still in the mix. I mentioned that I do have a gift for him, and that I can just leave it on his porch if he's busy. I've got a lot going on with family and friends, and I don't want to interrupt his date, if he's spending time with her. But we've known each other a long time and I thought we were trying to be friends. Since the NFL email, and his saying to text me when I'm in town, we aren't talking anymore. No texts like usual. Nothing. How do I deal with this for the holidays? Should I just save myself some pain and mail his gift after the holiday? I really want to be nice, but not if it makes me look like a loser in his eyes. I'm not sure what to do.
Adri Ana Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 Last real email I got from him was a week ago, asking me for my address. He wanted to send me a Christmas gift. I wasn't sure why he would want to do this since he is seeing someone else, and we discussed that my feelings were stronger for him, and we needed to back away from each other, since he didn't feel the same way. The cliche casual relationship where the scales get tipped, and I'm the one on the low end. And it was LDR, and who he's seeing now is local. Specifically he said "he cared about me very much, as I had become an important part of his life, but his feelings simply didn't run as deep for me as mine for him." I told him I would just need to think about it; he sent me an email saying He understood, that he forgot about leaving me alone, and that he promised he wasn't doing it on purpose. So I began LC. Since then, we had a brief email exchange about the NFL. His team is still in the mix. I mentioned that I do have a gift for him, and that I can just leave it on his porch if he's busy. I've got a lot going on with family and friends, and I don't want to interrupt his date, if he's spending time with her. But we've known each other a long time and I thought we were trying to be friends. Since the NFL email, and his saying to text me when I'm in town, we aren't talking anymore. No texts like usual. Nothing. How do I deal with this for the holidays? Should I just save myself some pain and mail his gift after the holiday? I really want to be nice, but not if it makes me look like a loser in his eyes. I'm not sure what to do. The main in your situation now is You feeling good . Sending a gift to an ex (I see him this way now as he is having a relationship with a local as you said) would be a nice human act of a friend. He himself had told you he wanted to send a gift (!) This shows he is not that narrowminded to consider you a loser once you send it to him yourself . ___________________________________________________ Pearl S. Buck: I love people. I love my family, my children . . . but inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up.
Author audrey_1 Posted December 23, 2008 Author Posted December 23, 2008 It would make me feel good to go ahead and give him the gift, but I would do it with no expectations. I have none and know nothing will come of it. Yes, he said he wanted to send me one, too. It's confusing as to why, but really I don't think we should see each other. I need to unplug. It's over. He's moved on, and I need to work on myself.
LiveandLearn Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 I say mail it to him. Don't put yourself in that situation if you're not ready to see him face-to-face. It will probably just end up making you feel worse than you already do, and you don't need that.
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