Festive Season plans...

[noforgiveness]

Yep, I think it's sad that the kids used that (their previous christmas experiences) as the benchmark, but at least this one was better.

 

yep and the man who abused or chose to let his children remain in abuse is who you are choosing to spend your life with. Good luck with the spineless weasel.

[OWoman]

yep and the man who abused or chose to let his children remain in abuse is who you are choosing to spend your life with. Good luck with the spineless weasel.

 

He would NEVER abuse his kids! He used to intervene and would land up getting abused himself when preventing his W from going at the kids.

 

I won't even comment on the "spineless weasel" nonsense

[noforgiveness]

He would NEVER abuse his kids! He used to intervene and would land up getting abused himself when preventing his W from going at the kids.

 

I won't even comment on the "spineless weasel" nonsense

 

He allowed his children to be abused and to live in an abusive household and yes if he did not leave someone who was abusing him spineless. Allowing your children to be abused is abusive. If this woman is abusive why does he allow his children to see her at all?

[Reggie]

You never fail to include derogatory characterizations of your dishonest MM's spouse. Why is that? You are preoccupied with justifying your affair.

It was an affair, nothing special. Just a couple of pathetic cheaters who lacked the courage to do things in the open.

You lack credibility with these constant allusions to the BW's shortcomings. You two losers should celebrate having found each other, as you deserve each other.

[Reggie]

Yeah, the kids must have just a ton of respect foe a woman that has led such a dishonest life.

You protest too much, never missing a chance to interject some weird comment about the BW's failings and you wonderful life.

You've led a life that no one would be proud of and now you have a spinelss cheater as a partner. Your deluding yourself if you think his kids are enthralled with you.

The smarmy way you describe your "best Christmas ever" crap is sickening.

[Die Hard]

He allowed his children to be abused and to live in an abusive household and yes if he did not leave someone who was abusing him spineless. Allowing your children to be abused is abusive. If this woman is abusive why does he allow his children to see her at all?

Okay I thought some were being harsh with the spineless talk but now I agree. Any man that would stay with a woman for even one night after she abused his kids is by definition spineless. Heck, his wife abusing the kids wasn't enough for him to leave but falling in love with another woman was???? By DEFINITION this guy is spineless AND selfish. Why you are on here complaining that the wife didn't take them is beyond me if she's been abusive to them in the past. You must not care for them any more than he does.:(

 

There is nothing I respect less in this world than a man who stays while his wife abuses his kids. He's sick. Women sometimes can't leave but there was obviously nothing stopping this guy since he did eventually leave for a piece of ass(which we all know is more important than your kids being abused). He's just a weak, sick human being.

[Reggie]

I highly doubt that XW was abusive. Just more of the same garbage to justify her wussy OM's cheating. Now, OW finds herself sort of trapped by the allegation that the BW was abusive but her OM stood by and let it happen.

Wonder what convoluted explanation we'll see next justifying his inaction re the alleged abuse. Got herself in a box here, now.

Yeah, sure , the abuse was horrible but he never did a thing to stop it and now they are aghast that the BW does not want the kids on Holidays. I'd have a field day on cross with this story.

[OWoman]

He allowed his children to be abused and to live in an abusive household and yes if he did not leave someone who was abusing him spineless. Allowing your children to be abused is abusive. If this woman is abusive why does he allow his children to see her at all?

 

this is so o/t that I'm not going to engage with it beyond referring you to the oitrature on 'why battered women (or men) stay'. If you want lessons, enrol in a course. My charity work doesn't extend that far.

[OWoman]

It was an affair, nothing special. Just a couple of pathetic cheaters who lacked the courage to do things in the open.

 

OTC, we did things in the open.

 

And yes, it was special, and remains so. Even if you don't see that, those who know us IRL do.

[OWoman]

Women sometimes can't leave but there was obviously nothing stopping this guy since he did eventually leave for a piece of ass.

 

he didn't leave "for a piece of ass" - he left after seeing that love and abuse were different things, thanks to the A and lots of IC, which also showed him that he had rights and needs too, and warranted respect. And that her behaviour was not "his fault", nor his responsibility to fix.

 

Her abuse of him was emotional, psychological and physical. Her abuse of the kids was "merely" verbal - he intervened when he was there, and the kids avoided it in the main by escaping to their rooms. They've also learned through counselling to counter it, and stand up to it - they're teens - and don't feel traumatised by it and are willing to see her and spend short amounts of time with her - this is their choice, one we respect and support and facilitate, on the recommendation of the family counsellor who is monitoring the situation.

[smarterthanbefore]

Well said reggie. I have went back and read alot of Owoman's threads, and she do bash BS a lot. That is to funny to me considering she had an affair with that woman's husband. It didn't matter what kind of wife or mother she was, does not justify affairs. She is still trying to convince us she is the better woman. Why is that? You already won the prize of a cheater for a boyfriend, what more do you want? Leave that woman alone and let her live her life and you and your MM live yours. The children are the business of MM and BS. Just be the girlfriend and stop bashing the BS. It's sickening.

[NoIDidn't]

I doubt very seriously that the BW ever abused her kids. She may have yelled at them in frustration and the MM and his friends overstated what actually happened and Owoman latched onto it for dear life.

 

As a child that was forced around my dad's OWs, having us smile and be polite and even embellish things a little (the *best* Christmas ever, lol) is normal. Shows that *Mom* taught us well. Now what me and my aunts said after the OWs were gone is something entirely different. Admittedly most was about the triffling man in the middle, but enough was about the OWs.

 

I think this man drove his BW crazy and she is well rid of him. The constant need to insult this woman, though, is more of a reflection on the person doing the insulting.

[Reggie]

Yes, her threads are just so chock full of gratuitous shots at the BW, as well as these bizzare proclamations that everyone sides with her and are overjoyed with this incredible union. It is just not credible and is obviously an attempt to convince herself and others of her female version of the "knight in shining armour" thing.

If OW is so happy nad things are working out so well, why the need to broadcast it ? Why the need to constantly go out of her way to convince others of how bad a person the BW is? This is a classic case of someone whistling in the dark. It's all BS.

[pelicanpreacher]

OWoman I'm curious ... Do you still harbor unresolved issues of resentment about your mother?

[moonshadow]

I've read this thread and I've had to laugh. Generally people who are truly happy and fulfilled in life, well...they don't have to go around bragging about it and sticking their newfound happiness in peoples' faces. Instead, that is someone who's desperately insecure and, beneath the arrogant and phony front they put on, they're scared sh*tless. An OW should be. If the MM did it to his W, he's clearly proven that he has the propensity to do it to the OW. What a laugh LOL.

 

I also love, and am slightly amused, at how mistresses profess to know alllllllllllllllll the horrid details about their MM's marriage and what a horrible person his W is/was. It shows how daft and naive they are; they believe only what the cheating *****er has told them and aren't strong or empowered enough to consider that it's all a lie. Of course a MM is going to paint the picture that his W is crazy, neurotic, a drunk, unstable, flakey, a rotten mother, abusive, miserable, bla bla bla. OW just aren't the sharpest tacks in the box, poor things.

[Reggie]

That's why they are relegated to OW status. Candlepower ain't their strongpoint.

[OWoman]

I also love, and am slightly amused, at how mistresses profess to know alllllllllllllllll the horrid details about their MM's marriage and what a horrible person his W is/was. It shows how daft and naive they are; they believe only what the cheating *****er has told them and aren't strong or empowered enough to consider that it's all a lie. Of course a MM is going to paint the picture that his W is crazy, neurotic, a drunk, unstable, flakey, a rotten mother, abusive, miserable, bla bla bla. OW just aren't the sharpest tacks in the box, poor things.

 

Then again, some of us haveheard almost nothing from the MM about his M, and a great deal from the others who've witnessed it over the years - friends, family and colleagues - who're not bound by any misguided ties of loyalty and feel free to speak. Some of us believe nothing until we corroborate it from multiple sources, and from direct observation. And some of us have even had sight of the medical , legal and HR records which substantiate some of the claims made by friends, family or colleagues. But of course some bitter BSs are going to believe what they want to believe, regardless of the evidence...

[herenow]

I find this so interesting. Most of the time the BW is accused of using the kids as a way to keep a MM trapped. The story goes like this: "If MM divorces BW she will take his kids away."

 

So, this BW decides not to fight, to back off and live her life and she is a bad person for it. Would it make the OP feel better if the kids had the choice and choose to be with their dad? Would it stroke her ego if the kids were put into the position of having to choose between their parents and not choosing their evil mother? Maybe the BW doesn't want to put her kids in that situation so she has just let things be.

 

Also, why isn't the OP just happy that she and MM are now together? Why is the BW such a big part of her dialogue? Let it go, the BW has.

[moonshadow]

I find this so interesting. Most of the time the BW is accused of using the kids as a way to keep a MM trapped. The story goes like this: "If MM divorces BW she will take his kids away."

 

So, this BW decides not to fight, to back off and live her life and she is a bad person for it. Would it make the OP feel better of the kids had the choice and choose to be with their dad? Would it stroke her ego if the kids were put into the position of having to choose between their parents and not choosing their evil mother? Maybe the BW doesn't want to put her kids in that situation so she has just let things be.

 

Also, why isn't the OP just happy that she and MM are now together? Why is the BW such a big part of her dialogue? Let it go, the BW has.

 

Because the OP, deep down, is very insecure and still feels threatened by the W. Also, she took great pleasure, while the A took place, to devote countless hours of energy in bashing the W to somehow "justify" being nothing more than a mistress who has to resort to stealing someone else's man......and it's just become a lasting habit to have such hatred and animosity. I've read a lot of her posts and she's very arrogant, even to fellow mistresses. She thinks she's the proverbial cat's a$$ and is smug in her belief that she has the world by the tail. People whose moral compass is long pass broken often behave/think this way. It's sad and pathetic, all rolled into one.

[moonshadow]

Then again, some of us haveheard almost nothing from the MM about his M, and a great deal from the others who've witnessed it over the years - friends, family and colleagues - who're not bound by any misguided ties of loyalty and feel free to speak. Some of us believe nothing until we corroborate it from multiple sources, and from direct observation. And some of us have even had sight of the medical , legal and HR records which substantiate some of the claims made by friends, family or colleagues. But of course some bitter BSs are going to believe what they want to believe, regardless of the evidence...

 

 

Aww, that's a heartwrenching tale. But really, if things were so abusive in the home such that evvvvvvvvvvvvvvverybody knew about it, you have to ask yourself why a man allow his children to remain in such a toxic environment. Sounds like a real man. Does he even have balls or are they just for decoration? It speaks volumes about you, my dear, that you would chase a man who allegedly was too weak and ball-less to remove his very children from a home of such utter chaos, dysfunction and abuse. Seems like you and he are a perfect pair!

[herenow]

If you think only normal, well-balanced and mentally healthy people manage to find BFs or GFs, you're very mistaken! :lmao:

 

Yeah I'm :lmao: too!:lmao:

[Reggie]

You identified the corner she painted herself into, Moon. She just was not bright enough to see it coming, too invested in justifying and demonizing. Now, watch for further contortions. She already backed off on the "abuse" allegation somewhat, "clarifying" that it was merely verbal so as not to make her affair partner look to balless.

How absurd: the abuse was so bad but the guy did nothing. The BW is pure evil but we need to hear how it so terrible that the kids are choosing to avoid her. Makes no sense, except to OW.

[moonshadow]

You identified the corner she painted herself into, Moon. She just was not bright enough to see it coming, too invested in justifying and demonizing. Now, watch for further contortions. She already backed off on the "abuse" allegation somewhat, "clarifying" that it was merely verbal so as not to make her affair partner look to balless.

How absurd: the abuse was so bad but the guy did nothing. The BW is pure evil but we need to hear how it so terrible that the kids are choosing to avoid her. Makes no sense, except to OW.

 

Hey Reggie, I guess some people just thrive on putting themselves on a pedestal and then constantly looking down and proclaiming how everyone is so inferior to them, and how they're so superior and evolved.

 

You gotta wonder what kind of person someone is, who believes they got such a prize when really all they got was someone's cheating husband. LMAO.

[herenow]

Hey Reggie, I guess some people just thrive on putting themselves on a pedestal and then constantly looking down and proclaiming how everyone is so inferior to them, and how they're so superior and evolved.

 

You gotta wonder what kind of person someone is, who believes they got such a prize when really all they got was someone's cheating husband. LMAO.

 

I get the feeling that the OP is a bit pissed that the BW isn't fighting anymore. There is nothing left in the competition. The BW isn't even putting herself in the position of having her kids not choose to be with her.

 

Maybe the BW got some good advice to fix herself and her life so she has moved on to do just that. Sounds like the OP likes to be in competition with the BW and "win". BW isn't playing that game.

[Reggie]

OW 's case is certainly an interesting study in the need for delusional thinking when dealing with the cognitive dissonance issue. You see it in cheaters all the time, but seldom this extreme.

Eh, yeah, there were court papers, medical records etc. corrobarating " some" of this abuse. Is that Oceanfront Property in Arizona still available? Perhaps you can inquire of your myriad cheerleading supporters if they want to buy some land, as well.