SarahT111 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 Argh having a massive vent here!! I havent slept in weeks and EVERY dam night I lay awake simply unable to get him and his stupid perfect new gf off my mind!!! Tonight I just feel like I have been used by him!! You know before you offically get together with someone, where you both confess you like each other and spend a ton of dates together etc etc, well while my ex was buttering me up he was also going after another MALE. So at the same time he is taking me out and telling me he really likes me and wants to ask me out etc, he was telling this other guy he really liked him and inviting him to stay with him. Even went to the extreme of sending him undewear shots of himself!! In all fairness it stopped when he asked me out (I Had NO idea about any of this untill after btw) Things went fine for the first few months but he had a female bestfriend who was OBSESSED with him. She had her own boyfriend but she hardly let me near my bf!! Everything sweet or nice I tried to do for him she ALWAYS did one better. He idolised her and would do ANYTHING for her. It came to the stage where I was finding txts they sent each other saying how much they loved each other and coulnt handle going the whole day without seeing each other. At the same time I was absolutly working my ass off to impress this guy. I would ask about her but she said there was nothing going on and he never felt that way about her and she was like a sister to him, He then said not to ask again because if I was insecure over it he would dump me! Anyway im sure you aware where this is heading.. She breaks up with her bf. He gets very distant, starts treating me like absolute crap, Makes me cry almost every night for a month. Laughed at me when I broke my wrist, then dumped me the night before my final exam. Two days later he is with her!!!!! I feel SOOO stupid!! I feel like I was used the whole time!!!! First off he was chasing after some guy when he was also chasing me then starts dating his bestfriend and im SURE it must have eventuated behind my back! I have gone NC the whole time, but he doesn't care anyway. He has his new gf and hes perfect new life and im the one who got stomped on. I just cant get it out of my head. It hurts SO bad and I feel SO stupid that I allowed myself to be such a doormat and not stand up to his behaviour. Im really angry at myself for that. He is away with his new gf laughing down at the pathetic weak girl who would have done anything for him. How do I take some of the power back? I feel NC isn't getting me anywhere! Also how do I move past this and trust again? Ahhhhh so frustrated here!!!!
Geishawhelk Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 You've been more or less posting the same question since June. You might as well just keep posting the same thread, because you have received so many replies to the 'same question', that it's abundantly clear that either we're not giving you a reply you can understand, or you ARE JUST NOT LISTENING!!!!! The only one who can get into your head, and stop you going stir-crazy - is you. The only one who can move you on, is you. You need counselling. You're over him. You're just not over being over him. You're addicted to talking about it, and getting off on being needy. I think you need help to get over the fact that you need help. So get help.
Author SarahT111 Posted December 22, 2008 Author Posted December 22, 2008 Geisha Actually we broke up in November so I dont see how I have ben posting the same since June. Im sorry if you felt it was the same thing over again but I felt SO much better after venting and getting that all off my chest. Please dont feel like you need to reply if you think its the same mindless jumble (as it probably is) But it did make me feel a bit better. Yes I know I need councilling and you will be glad to know im in the process of sorting that out as we speak.
Geishawhelk Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 Geisha Actually we broke up in November so I dont see how I have ben posting the same since June. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t153912/ Not the same guy necessarily. The same PROBLEM. Im sorry if you felt it was the same thing over again but I felt SO much better after venting and getting that all off my chest. Please dont feel like you need to reply if you think its the same mindless jumble (as it probably is) But it did make me feel a bit better. It might be temporary relief, but you seem to play and re-play the same scenario over and over again. So it can't be much fun for you. Yes I know I need councilling and you will be glad to know im in the process of sorting that out as we speak. You're right. I am glad. And my suggestion would be to stop dating all together, until you manage to sort out for yourself why you seem to home in on men who do nothing for you but leave you in tatters.
dns502475 Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 Do you have an email address? I'm actually very experienced in helping people who chronically experience the kinds of thoughts and emotions that you're currently dealing with. If it's okay with you, I'd like to help you figure this out and regain that control and power that is within you to get past this not only now, but in the future. I'm not trying to put you on the spot or anything, but I think you're situation is one that is unnecessarily painful, and absolutely holding you back from having an enjoyable and fulfilling life and that you would respond quite well to some help. Of course, it's completely up to you. Thanks, dns
Author SarahT111 Posted December 23, 2008 Author Posted December 23, 2008 Hi DNS I actually tried to private message you yesterday witht this story as you seem like someone who could really help so im thrilled to get this message! If you could PM me that would be awsome and I def need help sorting my head out!!
dns502475 Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 Unfortunately I can't send or receive PMs yet.
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