Tomcat33 Posted December 21, 2008 Posted December 21, 2008 "analysis paralisis" must be the word of the day http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=1963127&postcount=4 I heard thunder when you said that
Phateless Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 "analysis paralisis" must be the word of the day http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=1963127&postcount=4 I heard thunder when you said that I would honestly say that I think that term is the primary reason most of us joined LS in the first place.
Tomcat33 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 I would honestly say that I think that term is the primary reason most of us joined LS in the first place. you mean "indecision"?
Phateless Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 you mean "indecision"? It's a little more complicated than that, but yes.
Tomcat33 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 It's a little more complicated than that, but yes. Actually no it's not. Indecision can be applied to the lightest of situations just as it can be applied to the more complex of one. Waste management technitians are still the garbage people that come by to pick up our trash. At any rate, the question was do you agree that the woman should initiate physical contact, I strongly disagree. That's my final answer. No I don't need to call a friend or ask the audience.
Phateless Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 Actually no it's not. Indecision can be applied to the lightest of situations just as it can be applied to the more complex of one. Waste management technitians are still the garbage people that come by to pick up our trash. At any rate, the question was do you agree that the woman should initiate physical contact, I strongly disagree. That's my final answer. No I don't need to call a friend or ask the audience. lol I was referring to the OP who's having trouble deciding if she should make a move when she's in the moment. I don't think either person "should" make the move. I think BOTH people should make the move.
monkey00 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 Wow, so if I'm on a date and he's got his arm around me, and I lean in and give him a little kiss, now I'm the town skank? And aggressive? Really? Please. Oh, let's not forget desperate, too. And what I meant about thinking too much about this issue should be pretty self explanatory. My point, as some have seen here, is that when you are with someone and there's chemistry, you don't over analyze your every move. I did NOT mean that women shouldn't stop and think before jumping into bed with every Tom, Dick, and Harry. Isn't that obvious? And no, I don't do this every time. Many times the guy will kiss me first. I'm just saying that I have done it on multiple occasions and it's always been well received. I wholeheartedly agree. If there is mutual chemistry there is absolutely nothing wrong with a girl taking some initiative if not all. Personally I love a woman who knows what she wants and shows it rather than beat around the bush and expect the guy to know what's going on. Trust me guys are not nearly as good as reading body language as women are. About the whole hand holding thing. I think some individuals assume too much. If I'm hanging out with a girl and grab her hand or she'll grab mine, I don't really question it too much..things flow naturally if you're enjoying the other's company. I don't freak out that she's looking for commitment and I hope the girl does not either. If a girl grabs my hand among many other countless acts that scream she's desperate, then it's pretty obvious there's a red flag. Back to the OP - I like it when when I'm in the presence of a woman or talking to her and she'll pat me lightly on my arm. It shows she's listening and she's not afraid of physical contact by getting into my personal space. I like a woman that's well balanced, not too touchy but not too awkward about physicality either. Her patting me on my arm or being physical with me isn't going to make it or break it. It only helps a lot though if I'm already attracted to her. Of course it is a good indicator that she's receptive to my advances such as my pats/touches. I think what really works well is when a woman leaves a guy with small openings and lets him know his advances are appreciated.
BlueEyedGirl Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 I rarely make the first move, but if I am certain that the attraction is mutual, I don't hesitate. For example, few times some guy would walk me to my apartment building and then kind of hang around and say "well bye..." and kind of look at me in the way that I knew he wanted to kiss me but couldn't make the move. In those situations, I would step closer to the guy and kiss him first (gently on the lips) and they took it from there I have never had a negative response to that. It's all about being able to read people.
zenith Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 it's starting to sound like a chess game, bro
Tomcat33 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 it's starting to sound like a chess game, bro :lmao: nice! "bro" :lmao:
gummybear Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 This is my personal experience as to who should initiate what: I'm a girl: Ask out on date - guy touch arm - guy or girl arm over shoulder or waist - guy kiss - girl (though ok for guys to initiate too if guy gets hint from girl that it is ok) hand holding - guy exclusivity - guy sex - should come after exclusivity, which usually means both guy n girl know this is ok Hope this helps
zenith Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 :lmao: nice! "bro" :lmao: what's wrong, bro?
Tomcat33 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 what's wrong, bro? nothing your posts are funny :lmao:
zenith Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 nothing your posts are funny :lmao: thanks...why you crying then, bro?
kashmir Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 Tomcat, you're saying that a woman who makes even a few initial moves will be regarded as a skank. That may be true, but don't you think when a man makes initial moves on a woman that isn't interested in him, she'll regard him as a creep? I'm trying to say that it goes both ways. Men aren't completly free to go around and make moves with no negative consequences. The thing is, though, they have to not care about those negative consequences. If women would realize that looking like a skank to one guy isn't a big deal, then maybe they'd be just as confident as guys to make moves. I agree with the first post in that a woman who goes in for a touch or a kiss will be forgiven easier and will usually succeed. A man will more often be rejected and unforgiven for making a move when the woman doesn't want it. The point is though the man shouldn't give a crap.
carhill Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 thanks...why you crying then, bro? Not Tomcat, but that's a tears of laughter emoticon. Ever laugh so hard you cry? Also, pretty sure TC's a "chick", but I'm feeling pretty hermaphrodite today....
Tomcat33 Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 Tomcat, you're saying that a woman who makes even a few initial moves will be regarded as a skank. . No I am saying that a woman who is too forward and makes all the moves ie initates contact, has her tounge down his ear during dinner or movie, then kisses him first and askes him up to her place is considered sexually agressive, and that is perceived as being trampy or easy. You know, too forward? Not Tomcat, but that's a tears of laughter emoticon. Ever laugh so hard you cry? Also, pretty sure TC's a "chick", but I'm feeling pretty hermaphrodite today.... He knows on both counts, that's his schtick. I think it's really funny... But thank you CH, always such a gentleman
Ariadne Posted December 22, 2008 Posted December 22, 2008 I rarely make the first move, but if I am certain that the attraction is mutual, I don't hesitate. For example, few times some guy would walk me to my apartment building and then kind of hang around and say "well bye..." and kind of look at me in the way that I knew he wanted to kiss me but couldn't make the move. In those situations, I would step closer to the guy and kiss him first (gently on the lips) and they took it from there I have never had a negative response to that. It's all about being able to read people. Hehe Yeah, most guys that really liked me I´ve kissed them all first. They were just too nervous and taking too long.
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