SarahT111 Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 Im so dam angry right now I have been crying all day but now im just filled with anger. I want to break NC and just go nuts at hiM!!!! I NEVER got my chance and its eating away at me Should I do it?? Just a very quick recap. My ex treated me like crap and broke my heart. The whole time I acted the bigger person. I felt I was the perfect gf to him and the instant he dumped me I wished him well and started NC. Since going NC he has spread untrue lies about our breakup to friends which hurt like hell. I think he wanted a reaction or just to make him self look better but I stayed strong and didnt react. That stopped and then I found out he had an affair with another male the same time he was chasing after me. Finally I got over that (Still doing nc here) when I found out he is dating one of our bestfriends and it had been going on behind my back for quite sometime. He lied to my face many times during the relationship. I also found out they have planned a holiday together to Europe early next year. The ENTIRE time I remained NC. I am an absolute mess, cant eat or sleep and cry all day long. I just want to die. He doesn't know that I know any of this. I just want to break NC and yell and scream at him for doing all of this!!! I cant believe the amount of stuff I have found out after we split and the enormous hurt it has brung me IT IS NOT FAIR. Im tired of trying to be the bigger person and act like im happy and I dont care. I want him to suffer. I want to tell everyone about his male affair and scream at him for lying to me about everything. I regret being nice to him when we broke up. Now I wished I had told him what I really think of the way he was treating me and others. Its a bad idea to do this right? It just SEEMS SO UNFAIR that he can treat me this way and lie to my face etc then get the girl of his dreams. He will be happy for xmas, he will be going on holiday with his new gf to europe while my heart is smashed to pieces and I hate life. How is this fair???? I can assure I never set a foot wrong in this relationship. He treated me like crap (as there was someone else on the scene) and he let me carry on treating him like a prince. Im sick and tired of trying to be the bigger person and im sick and tired of trying to be nice. All its done is allowed him to move on and me feel like a useless doormat. Well im absolutly sick of it Time to get some revenge do you think?
saams Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 revenge wont do you any good, it's not gonna make you feel less hurt or make things right again i dont think you should contact him at all, dont tell people stuff they dont need to know about him either, think of this as a bad experience and learn from it, so it wont happen again... i been through the exact same thing and i did actually call and yelled at her on the phone and all that stuff and believe me it wasnt worth it.. you should talk to someone about it and let it out but not to him, talk to some family instead or other people who been in a simular situation.
EmperorR Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 revenge wont do you any good, it's not gonna make you feel less hurt or make things right again i dont think you should contact him at all, dont tell people stuff they dont need to know about him either, think of this as a bad experience and learn from it, so it wont happen again... i been through the exact same thing and i did actually call and yelled at her on the phone and all that stuff and believe me it wasnt worth it.. you should talk to someone about it and let it out but not to him, talk to some family instead or other people who been in a simular situation. Agree, My Ex cheated on me dumped me said hurtful things I never said anything, it ate away at me for a long time to, I just wanted to get all my anger out at her etc., but then I realized she doesn't care, it's only going to show them that you still care etc. I mean vent I agree get it out, but do it here or write a letter or a draft and don't send it, continue on your NC and don't look back.
D-Lish Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 That stopped and then I found out he had an affair with another male the same time he was chasing after me. That's the end right there... it's not you at all honey- he's GAY. I don't give a crap about what people say about bi-sexuality.... guys that dabble in other guys are GAY.
Author SarahT111 Posted December 20, 2008 Author Posted December 20, 2008 Thanks sam and emperor & d-lish Sam & emperor Your both right in saying that I shouldnt break NC and go pshyco but it just all seems so unfair right now!! I know it probably wont make me feel any better and i'll probably get hit with bad Karma or it backfiring. How do I cope tho? So much information has come to me after we broke up. So many lies have surfaced and so much hurt and pain has come my way. While he gets off scott free, planning a holiday in europe with his new gf! This firstly devastated me but now im so angry. I let myself get treated like a doormat and I want revenge! I have so much I could destroy him with but I havent and cant! Wish I was more of a bitch in situations like so! And D-Lish Thats what I thought to!! It was actually easier that way. Then he started dating some hot blonde girl and all my theories got thrown out the window!! This dam girl is impossible to fault and I hate it She made me feel like crap when I was dating my ex. She ALWAYS did one better than me!!!!!!!! Quick example, im a uni student and lived 4 hours away from him. I spent the money to fly down for his birthday but didnt have a lot left for a present. She on the other hand gave him about 4 presents all perfect and thoughtful. I orgainised to take him out but turns out when I got there she had already orgainised a surprise party for him. He loved her for it! She did sooooooooooooooo much for him. She got one up on me everytime no matter how hard I tried to please him she would always do one better It just really sucks! I feel like a loser
inulg Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 dont do it. my ex left me for someone else, i did bitch him out, and try to be the bigger person at the same time ( i KNOW that sounds conflicting, but i assure you, it was a civil bitching out... lol ... mostly) anyhow it just makes them laugh at you and think you're pathetic for even getting angry. they get a power trip out of it. its sad. we don't deserve this. somehow, we've just gotten very unlucky in love this time around. at least we know what NOT to look for in the next relationship, eh?
Author SarahT111 Posted December 20, 2008 Author Posted December 20, 2008 Thanks inulg You are right of course! I couldnt stand the thought of those two laughing in my face!! I guess the best thing is to just disappear (which I have been doing) I just wish I could do more!! Its SOOOO unfair!! And karma never seems to help me out in situations like this either! This guy has broken so many hearts and yet he just keeps climbing up and up. gosh it sucks!!! Why even bother trying to be a nice caring person! Theres really no point! It seems the nastier you are and the more people you crush the more happiness you get in return!! And here I am pretty much unable to hurt anyone and all I get is heartache and crushed dreams!! its unfair!
justdoe Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 Revenge takes too much energy. Just let it go. You may never know when and what happened when Karma kicked in his door and beat him down. We all want revenge. It is just pointless. It shows that you care. DON'T do anything! Learn from this. Then put that badge of restraint and tolerance on your "vest". YOU EARNED IT
Crazy.S Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 This is a BAD idea! If he failed to appreciate you for what you did, then he does not deserve you. I know it is hard, but things will get better. Revenge is fine, but the best revenge is NC. I am not saying NC is for revenge, but it is from his perspective.
openbook08 Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 Hiya SarahT111 your ex sounds a lot like mine during our rship & you sound a lot like me after the break up. we can hold our heads high girl we've got our dignity and grace. revenge is a dish best served cold and we will have the last laugh, he who laughs last laughs best. so come on dont ruin all the hard work & sit and bide your time with me! :D
smiiiley Posted December 20, 2008 Posted December 20, 2008 don't kill the karma...lol let it be, he will get his someday...believe me..it always happens. You cursing at him will only give him satisfaction, if you really dont intend on being his friend or having nothing to do with him then i suggest you just dont break NC...If you hate him and want him to feel bad for what he did, indifference is what hurts the other person most..
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