LostNLonely Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 Because emotions are irrational. Wanting what you can't have is human nature, but this need is especially strong in two types of people: those with low self esteem and those with an over-inflated ego. In both cases, the individual sees their object of desire as a reflection of what they want to be. So if they "win over" that object, it inflates their own sense of self worth. They don't have a stable inner sense of confidence so they need outside things (other people, status symbols, material goods....whatever) to make them feel good about themselves. You belong to the low self esteem category, imo. You're confident in some ways, but I think deep down there's a sense of inadequacy or "differentness" ingrained in your soul. Growing up you were an outsider and you still feel like an outsider in many ways. Winning over the Mr. Popular that you idealized in high school feels like it would be the ultimate acceptance, righting all the wrongs and amending all the feelings of rejection you've accumulated over the years. You've created a paradox for yourself. What you ultimately want you can never attain because the minute somebody completely accepts you and becomes vulnerable, you will devalue them in some way. Why? Because you are so convinced of your own "craziness" or whatever you want to call it that somebody who appreciates you must be flawed in some way. You won't be a part of any club that will have you as a member. The only way out of this conundrum is recognizing the difference between what you want and what you need. Basically to break the cycle you have to find some other source of confidence that isn't the affection of another person. Once you feel good about yourself, you'll appreciate somebody who treats you well. You ought to turn pro with this type of dead-on analysis...
Author spookie Posted December 28, 2008 Author Posted December 28, 2008 I wasn't really necessarily talking "looks" leagues, though. Maybe he doesn't want to date an exstripper, exalcie, pothead, etc. This doesn't make him bad...just in a different league. WTF is an exalcie? Did you mean recovering alcoholic?
Star Gazer Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 I've seen both of their pictures and Spookie is objectively more attractive, so that's a non-issue. Assuming "leagues" even exist, I find it sad that you define them by appearances alone. It actually explains a lot.
Nemo Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 Assuming "leagues" even exist, I find it sad that you define them by appearances alone. It actually explains a lot. Helloooo!! Plastic surgeons shape our world. A nip here, and a tuck there. That's where it's at. One has to search far and wide before they can find a human being comfortable with what God gave them. Time takes everything away eventually, except perhaps our souls. And all souls were created equal. There are no soul leagues. Except maybe good and bad ones.
shadowplay Posted December 28, 2008 Posted December 28, 2008 Assuming "leagues" even exist, I find it sad that you define them by appearances alone. It actually explains a lot. I personally don't believe in leagues, but when people refer to them it's usually in reference to attractiveness.
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