epicdude Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 Well this is complicated so bear with me. I went into a restaurant last wed, the server made it clear she was doing more than just serving me, she even said I should come back in again and see her. I asked her for her number and she said "a girl's gotta be careful, so come see me and we'll talk more" fair enough. I go in a week later, meeting friends for dinner I show up 15 min early. She comes over and seems pretty happy I'm there. We talk and I tell her I've been in this restaurant a hundred times before and have never flirted with a server before, and there must be something about her, and that I'd really like to get to know her. So after talking a bit more I smile and say..."here's the plan, have coffee with me this week, and let me take you to dinner next week because we're both going away for christmas and I'd really like to see you. She smiles and says..."okay but slow down, coffee for sure I'd love too, and we'll worry about dinner after that" I counter with..."well it's a good thing you stopped me at coffee cause I was going to suggest coffee, dinner and getting married and having a beautiful life together (laughing) Hope she realizes I was joking. Then she asks me about the house warming party I had as I just moved. And we chat a bit more. when I go to pay my bill she says "get your friends to wait up front so we can have a little chat and set coffee up" * * * HERE'S the WEIRD part!! *** When I go to pay the bill and set coffee up, she says "I really wanna have a coffee with you but I have to work split shifts here for the next six days" And I need to work to save money cause Im going away for 3 wks in January. Im just about to ask her for her number one last time when she tells me to give her mine. As a guy, I recognize this as the kiss of death, but I have asked her for her number and she's not giving me the digits...so I think for a second and realize I don't know my new number, and my cell phn crapped out a wks ago, so I tell her I can't remember my new number and she laughs, but I say..."I'll give you my e-mail address, you drop me an e-mail and we'll set up coffee" Im pretty much feeling at this point that it's all over, as I have come to know if a woman wants to call you instead of the other way around....it's gotta be a brush off. I tell her that she seems pretty busy,and that if she doesn't wanna have coffee with me it's cool I understand. She tells me she is being truthful and is just stupid busy right now....I say okay, cool, e-mail me and I leave SO HERE'S THE BIG QUESTION... Was it the brushoff? Do I go back in AGAIN in a few days ?? Do I actually wait for her to e-mail me...don't think it's gonna happen.
AM1 Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 wait for the e-mail. she wouldn't of gone that far into it if it wasn't serious. there could of been plenty of ways to end it. i personally wouldn't show up again. she knows how to get to you, and you should wait... my senses tell me it will pay off good luck
prettybaby Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 Only time will tell lol I'm thinking she'd either e-mail within a week, or not at all, but stranger things have happened Plus, it is Holiday season after all, people get very busy. So don't lose hope just yet. I wouldn't automatically assume that her not wanting to give out her number is a bad thing. I've done it before when I wasn't 100% sure about the guy/situation, so I could take my time to think about it and then call myself when it feels right. Sometimes I didn't call; so, it really depends. In any case, don't take it too personally. Fact is she hardly knows you at all. At this point, you've done the maximum, so sit back and wait
Viking Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 Usually it is the kiss of death. I've had it happen and BAM, nothing. But she seems to be interested enough to tell you WHY she couldn't do it easily, just to let you know that she's not completely blowing you off.
Capricciosa Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 She's a waitress, lots of guys ask her for her number. She's wise to not give it out. At the beginning of your story I thought she was just trying to get a good tip, but by the end I thought she was interested. You went a little overboard with the dinner invitation, which gave her a moment of pause perhaps. But email might work. She should at least say hello soon, given her work schedule and the holidays. I wouldn't go back for a while and see how it plays out.
runner Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 ball's in her court, but i wouldn't wait. if she happens to contact you, then great; if not, life's still grand and who cares Q1: not a total brush-off. still some possibilities there. Q2: i would only go back in again cos i wanted to, and not for the sake of checking up on her
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