Teenage Behavior I Don't Understand

[magiadam]

Hey everyone,

 

I'm currently, 18 years old, in my last year of College, then University next year.

 

A little background. I was in a crazy, abusive relationship for about two and a half years, broke up (in June 08), and life was great.

 

Since then, I've been looking for new love. But it's a bit complicated. The signs women give sometimes, it's so...absurd.

I have a very very hard time trying to tell whether a girl is interested in me, or that everything they do is for friendly purposes.

 

Case 1. Just in September, the beginning of the semester, I started getting close to one of my classmates. We had breaks together, kept each other company, it was great. I wasn't on planning on making any moves, incase I'd ruin the friendship. The friendship went on for 5-6 weeks, I was happy. She started telling me about how she had a crush on this new guy and everything. I gave her advice and still remained her friend (was a bit jealous and disappointed but that's minor). After they were together, our closeness started to distant out (since she has a SO), and well. It was a good experience, we are simply aquaintances now, as oppose to close hang out friends, this made me quite sad.

 

Case 2. After the girl from the Case 1 was mostly out of my interest (only as a friend), I started to get to know another young lady. Now that it's in December, it's exam period. I offered a proposal to study together (with the new girl), and her voice was delighted to say yes, we exchanged numbers pretty quickly. Living in Canada, the weather is terrible. The day we were suppose to meet up at school to study together, the weather was terrible. She called me, and offered, to study at HER place, instead of school. Being surprised that she invited me over even though she didn't really know me, I accepted her offer.

 

So I was at her house the other day, just the two of us. I didn't make any moves nothing, stuck it as friends (though I wanted to go further...I just didn't want to lose the friendship). I was at her house for about 8 hours. She offered food, she served me, took away my plates and such, serve my drinks, so sweet and nice.

To be honest, I was quite sure she liked me. We studied, and talked about each other; we didn't really know each other so we properly introduced ourselves.

It was late, and when came the goodbye. She was leaning on the door and I on the side of the door-lock? (not sure). We stared into each other's eyes, and yada yada. Anyways, we hugged after, and it was great. Later on in the night, she texted me to see if I got home safe and if the ride home wasn't too bad. This really made my night.

Although it was only our first time together really, I wanted to make a move so badly, you have no idea.

As friends though, I kept my distance to show my respect.

 

Today at school, we talked and such. Wasn't really the same vibe as it was at her house but w/e. Anyways, out of nowhere, one of our classmates starts joins our conversation and kinda takes the attention away from me to him. He starts flirting with her and then all of a sudden, picks her up (like baby) and started running away. Her voice was screaming all in delight and laughter, and I was just standing there like, WTF do I do now? Do I follow, do I go?

And it kinda hurt in a way, I think the jealousy got the best of me.

 

Do you guys see where I'm getting at?

Is there something that I'm not doing that I'm supposed to? Should I be more physical with my female friends?

I do not know any physical contact that wouldn't affend or make a girl think twice...

Am I too, keep-my-distant because we're friends?

I don't understand...

This is very frustrating and affects my self-esteem when I know it shouldn't.

 

I planned on going skating next week with a group of friends, and I planned to invite her (Case 2 Girl) so I could spend more alone time with her. Should I or should I not?

 

Thanks all

[PrincessPeach]

If you like a girl... make a move! Otherwise we won't think you like us and any interest we might of had or the potential to have will quikcly fade. These girls become your friends because you treat them like your friends. Don't worry about losing the friendship. Many of the great things in life involve a little risk (relationships are one of them!).

 

There is definately playful touching that can be appropriate and non-sexual, yet still gets the point accross. Not everything is a bad as you think of in your mind. Once you get past that thought-block and are comfortable with the idea of doing what you want to do, girls will be okay with it too. It takes confidence and most girls like that quite a bit But if you aren't willing to do or go after what you want, girls will notice that and see it as an unattractive trait.

[magiadam]

I had an exam and we said Hi before the exam started.

I managed to finish early and I attempted to wait for her but there so many people and I wasn't able to "surpringly bump" into her and start a conversation.

We have one more exam on Monday, and it's our last exam.

I asked her out to Tuesday but she's leaving on Wednesday.

 

I'm gonna for sure stay the whole time during my exam so we can leave the room together and I can talk to her.

But she's leaving soon and I only have one more day to talk to her.

What do I do?...

 

Tell her to pack me up in her suitcase and take me with her? Ahaha.

 

No but in all honesty, I don't know what to do...

[Eve]

I say find a way to keep in touch with her. If anything it is good that you have found traits in someone which you like... especially after what you have been through. I am at the other end of the scale and I am now happily married. Looking back, some of the traits I liked in people I fancied or dated are very strong in my husband.. Maybe this is the first of many 'keys' which will guide you towards a future love? Maybe it will be this girl, maybe it wont but at least you are being treated as well as you aim to treat others, so the experiences so far I would say are good.I think you sound really sensitive and sweet and wish you well.Regards,Eve xx