zell805 Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 Where do i start? How about Im 28yo, I have a 5yo son, Ive been with a older man for 3 almost 4 years we've been living together. I was a nanny for my friends 2 children during school hours until her husband lost his job, other than that I really haven't worked since I had my child, my bf takes care of us finantialy and I do everything elce. Ive been through alot of **** with him in the past 3 years, he's a alcholic (and not a good one) he has a heart condition we found out about 2 yrs ago and has tryed to quit drinking, he gets very verbaly abusive when intoxicated and at times physcialy abusive also, he has treated me like **** and everyones seen it, I was the one always picking him up from the bars trashed n what not, anyways theres ALOT to it, a little over a year ago, we got into a major fight and he kicked me out, so I stayed with my friends that I watch theyre kids, after two weeks I ended up sleeping with a friend of theyrs (my age) who I bascialy fell for and wanted to prusue, well of course my ex hit bottom and realized what he lost and wanted me back...I did not run back to him but he ended up doing alot of convincing and then he had a light heart attack and I freaked out, felt bad and gave him another chance. He did very good for a while, didnt drink or anything, but time has a way with us all and after about a year he ended up getting back to where he was drinking again, I was to the point where i started looking for a FT job so I can get on my feet and leave him, we even slept in seprate rooms for a while, then 3 months ago he started working out of town all week, only comming home on the weekends. I had only seen the OM twice at my friends house in the last year, just saying hi and leaving, no conversation or what not, but then two months ago we ran into eachother and started talking, we once again felt that instant connection and within a couple weeks started seeing eachother again, Ive very actively been looking for a good enough job for me to leave my bf, but with the economy and the holidays I have had no luck, I feel stuck, Im living a double life bascily, and starting to feel really guilty for my bf who has no idea about the OM, I want to leave my bf, I want to be able to support myself and child without him and OMG Im going CRAZY! Im sure something will come thru after the new year, but till then Im stressed out and very guilty, I feel stuck, I feel like **** and it sucks......
Untouchable_Fire Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 Even though your BF is a prick... he deserves some form of honesty. My suggestion is to leave him. Find somewhere else to stay until you can get back on your feet. The fairer you treat him the less dangerous the situation will be.
Author zell805 Posted December 18, 2008 Author Posted December 18, 2008 Thats what I want to do, but dont have the $$ to and I have a house full of stuff, animals and my child....but I agree he deserves honesty even though hes treated me like crap.... It kills me...even though he's hurt me till Ive shattered, I still don't want to hurt him like that even though I know I am..... “You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel.”
Athena Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 So you want to leave your boyfriend for the OM? Can you move in with OM? What about the child's father -- does he help financially with your child? Do you still work part time as a nanny? Perhaps you can advertise to look after pets while people go away for the holidays? Sometimes people need someone trustworthy to house-sit. The post office would be needing help at this time of the year...
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