annie77 Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 Should I assume he is? Only went out with him twice. Monday night was the last time we saw each other and things went really good, had great conversation, laughed, it was just a fun time. After we parted ways that night, he texted me asking if I got home safe. I told him yes & thank you for the great time. He then replied saying that he had a great time and can't wait to see me again and that he would text me the following day, which was yesterday. Didn't hear from him so I just shot him a quick text last night. It took him over 5 hours to respond and this was what he said, "Sorry just got your message. I've been so busy!" I knew he was leaving out of state tomorrow night for a big sports event he's been training really hard for. So I replied telling him not to worry if I don't see or hear from him by then, that I wish him luck on the event. Never did hear back from him. I know he comes back Sunday. Think I could possibly hear from him again or should I assume that last message of his is a hint that he's not interested anymore?
xpaperxcutx Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 I think he acknowledged your texts, but he hasn't the time or that big of an interest to actually go through with the pursuing. You should give him time until he comes back to see what happens next. In the meantime, I would advise you to take your time away from your cell and work on yourself. You'll find that doing others automatically takes your mind off of him.
Rebellious Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 He told you that he's "busy", so I don't think you should "assume" anything more or try to read his mind.
Author annie77 Posted December 19, 2008 Author Posted December 19, 2008 I'm trying hard not to "assume"... I just think it was odd that he seemed so interested, even after the date, but then then next day he's not. To me, a text like that is like a hint, trying to be nice and at the same time, hoping I would take that hint and leave him alone.
EYECANDY000 Posted December 19, 2008 Posted December 19, 2008 Relax... he's not blowing you off. You said yourself he's training for an event... you will get to see him sunday...
Author annie77 Posted December 20, 2008 Author Posted December 20, 2008 Need some thoughts on this... since he will be back tomorrow morning, would it be ok for me to just send him a casual text tomorrow night asking how his event went? That wouldn't sound too desperate, right?
DunnoWhat Posted December 21, 2008 Posted December 21, 2008 If he was interested he would have texted back. I don't think he is that interested. No loss. Find somebody who has more interest.
EYECANDY000 Posted December 21, 2008 Posted December 21, 2008 Need some thoughts on this... since he will be back tomorrow morning, would it be ok for me to just send him a casual text tomorrow night asking how his event went? That wouldn't sound too desperate, right? I would probaly wait until Monday to call or text only because his event sounds like it may have been strenuous. And if it was im sure the only thing thats on his mind is relaxing and taking it really easy.
D-Lish Posted December 21, 2008 Posted December 21, 2008 Need some thoughts on this... since he will be back tomorrow morning, would it be ok for me to just send him a casual text tomorrow night asking how his event went? That wouldn't sound too desperate, right? Wait for him to text you!!!! DO NOT text him again. He's probably got his mind on the event right now- that is his focus. If he is interested, he will get in touch. If he's not- no amount of you texting him will change his mind.
Author annie77 Posted December 23, 2008 Author Posted December 23, 2008 Just have an update on my situation. I caved in last night and sent a quick casual text just basically telling him I hope he had a safe flight back and asked how the event went.... So it took him a few hours to text me back last night and it was short and sweet. He said it went well and they did great on the event. I decided to initiate and "feel him out" a bit so I asked him if he was up for sushi sometime this week, because we did discuss going to this particular restaurant upon his return. He responded with an enthusiastic "Yeah sure!!! Plus I'll be partying all this week to unwind." I replied, "Great, then we can celebrate, I'll treat you to a couple of them drinks we talked about." Then he texts "I want you!" I said the same thing back... all these texts kinda pointed in the direction that he was still at least semi-interested, right? Well, another new day today, and I will be visiting friends who actually live near him, so I shot him a text letting him know that I will be in town and asked if he was up for sushi tonight. That was 4 hours ago... Why in the world would he say those things in a text, which to me, sound like he's at least a little interested, then do this again? Is he just not interested at all, and just enjoy playing some sort of game? What should be my next move, just realize that I've exhausted all my options and I've done all I can and take it as a loss???
2sunny Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 seems like maybe he has a wife or steady girlfriend... hence the delayed response time and a willingness to immediately jump to "i want you." also easier for him to get away with this if you don't live close by... how far away do you two live? my gut says he's spoken for but playing you as the OW. come right out and ask him...
SDSJ Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 Annie 77 , I can totally relate to your post becuase I had someone who has sweet-talking me and then puff it all came down to nothing in les sthan hours. My situation is different though ( you can read my post tittled" I cut him off did I overreact " ) although they are different situations it reminds me that sometimes people go great lenghts with words , but after this situation I understood that ACTIONS count more than words . In my opnion , you already did your part trust me , if he is interested he will try everything EVERYTHING to see you .I wouldnt judge in terms of how many hours have passed befoe the last text because soemtimes people can be busy . Just step back and look at the picture as a whole ..let it be , dont contact him again because you texted last and see where it goes . if he does replies with a good excuse and maybe a date and time to meet and if he keeps beign loyal to his word then great, but if he keeps on bailing like this ( like he can call you to ask you out on the weekend but he can dissapear the week after) .. then you have a big red flag and it will be better to get out of this sooner than later ! You dont want to invest your feelings for too long only to be really hurt at the end . Lesson of my story . Good luck !
Author annie77 Posted December 23, 2008 Author Posted December 23, 2008 Thank you so much! Well, we don't live too far apart, it's about a 25 minute drive. My family also lives there, it's where I grew up so I'm there quite often to visit them as well. I do think I've pretty much exhausted all my options and I've done all I can. But you're absolutely right... I've made it abundantly clear that I AM interested and I did extend the invitation so if he really wanted to see me, then he would put in more effort. It's starting to make more sense too, that he could possibly be seeing someone else. I think it's time I realize he's done with me and I probably will never hear from him again. Because I think he's only texting to respond to my texts. So I'll just stop and give up on the guy. A part of me thinks though... that after a couple weeks of no contact, when I've forgotten about it, that he'll just contact me out of the blue. That happens a lot with dating doesn't it??? I hate games! I really appreciate the feedback. Good luck to you!!!
SDSJ Posted December 23, 2008 Posted December 23, 2008 Yeah and if he is playing games and if he texts a couple of weeks later is not becuase he is interested is mainly ego , people that do this are very selfish and like to have all the attention to themselves , so obviously if you stop talking to him and making him special he will come back for more attention when he needs it ONLY , its called using people as fillers , and you of course are not going to reply . Unless he genuily cares , but if he does he wont text in two weeks.
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