TyTiger1 Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 Hello to all the people of this forum. I am opening myself up to this website because I have no other place to go or get advice on how to handle my recent breakup. I had been with my girlfriend for 2 1/2 years. The first 5 months were long distance, then I lived with her for about a year, then the last year its been long distance. At first our relationship was great, even with the distance. I did notice though she had issues that could come up later in our relationship, and sure enough they did. I moved down with her, and she would constantly hide her phone because guys would be texting and calling at weird hours of the night. Then whenever she'd go out, I wasnt allowed cause her and her girlfriends couldent get into VIP or frat houses cause they were bringing a guy. This led to me being alone alot, in a town I knew nobody. I then got heavily into drugs, painkillers, to numb the pain I was always feeling of insecurities. It got so bad I checked myself into treatment, which she visited me every chance she could, but I had to earn her trust again. So I went to live in a sober living house, but she still wanted to drink and party, but tried to support me and my situation at the same time, and it was hard on both of us. I then moved back to my hometown because I got a job i couldent refuse. Things got bad from there. I caught her talking to her ex boyfriend on myspace in innapropriate ways. Shed dissapear at nights and I wouldent hear from her till the next morning, but I always trusted her story. Then about 6 months ago, her own biological sister was at a frat party with her and caught her making out with a guy. She called and told me cause she felt so bad for me cause i gave this girl everything. I paid for flights down to see her 3 times a month. She cried and I took her back. Recently we have been having issues, but just last week I went down to visit her, and we had a great weeekend. But then, last night, it happened. I had her facebook password and she didnt know it, I had this gut feeling somethin wasnt right, so I signed on under her name and got an instant message from this guy. He called her baby and said i sent you a private message just like u wanted so your jealous boyfriend wouldent find out. He said how much he liked her and if they were still on for their date this sat. I confronted her and she said yes shes been talkin to this guy but it just started. Im like how could u do this after I was just down their!!??! Anyways, she now wants to be split up, and im left heart broken. I know the signs were there, but im a dumbass and im left a mess. I cant eat, sleep, and keep thinkin bout her with this other guy. Any advice out there would be great, I just need someone to tell me its gonna be ok. Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this.
EmperorR Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 It will be ok, cut contact from her keep yourself busy. Don't slip back into painkillers or drugs, there Is a light at the end of tunnel. Cutting of contact allows you to heal yourself, see things clearly and focus on the most important thing you. I know it's hard now, I've been there couldn't eat, sleepless nights, tear soaked pillows, feeling like why me etc., only thing that healed me was no contact it's a hard thing to do but it's the quickest way to heal.
hereandnow Posted December 18, 2008 Posted December 18, 2008 I agree with the Emperor. Don't contact her. I feel for you man. No other pain feels like heartbreak. Keep posting on here, it helps tremendously. Even if you're just getting your feelings out. Have you managed to stay sober? I'm a recovered alcoholic and addict myself. Been to treatment, halfway house, sober living, the whole shebang. Are you a friend of Bill W.?
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