Heartagram Posted December 17, 2008 Posted December 17, 2008 I posted in Capricossia's thread but I figured I'd repost since it does bother me: I'm finding myself in a similar situation right now...I just can't find the right words to say to someone I've been dating for 2 months, but can't see a future with. He's a few years younger than me, and while the blinders were on in the beginning and I thought that wasn't really going to be an issue, I now think ultimately it is one. Is that appropriate to come out and say to someone straight away? I don't want to make him feel that his goals of going back to school, getting his degree, etc, are wrong that it's made me want to break things off with him. Quite the contrary, I respect that and feel it's great but not something that's going to be finished within the next 4-5 years. There's also the added issue that my parents are facing a crisis at the moment and I will be out of town helping for most of the next few weekends (indeterminable really, until things are better) and that's just not fair to a burgeoning relationship. But I DO want to be friends with this person, and yes that might be selfish but it's something I really want. So do I just tell him this like I've said here??
TG84 Posted December 17, 2008 Posted December 17, 2008 From someone who has just been dumped, I would tell him: - The truth in no uncertain terms, but be understanding about it. - You think highly of him and his endeavors, but it's just that you and him are not meant to be as a couple in the long run. And he will see this in time. - You are doing this at this particular moment because of the situation with your parents. And most importantly, do it in person if at all possible. If he contacts you after that, make sure you just repeat all the stuff above to him Y'all went out for two months, so he'll get over it soon as long as you let him know why you need to move on.Most the people here are here because of the hanging uncertainty surrounding the breakup -- make sure there is none of that.
Author Heartagram Posted December 17, 2008 Author Posted December 17, 2008 From someone who has just been dumped, I would tell him: - The truth in no uncertain terms, but be understanding about it. - You think highly of him and his endeavors, but it's just that you and him are not meant to be as a couple in the long run. And he will see this in time. - You are doing this at this particular moment because of the situation with your parents. And most importantly, do it in person if at all possible. If he contacts you after that, make sure you just repeat all the stuff above to him Y'all went out for two months, so he'll get over it soon as long as you let him know why you need to move on.Most the people here are here because of the hanging uncertainty surrounding the breakup -- make sure there is none of that. Yeah that is logical. But I wonder, with the holidays and all, if the timing is even appropriate.... I guess that's been one of my major concerns as well.
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