Lucky555 Posted December 15, 2008 Posted December 15, 2008 we have a date set up for this week. He has been texting me for 3 weeks and we have been getting to know each other. Now he said this last night, "i like you a lot. Do you like me?" I replied "yes i do like you a lot :)" I mean i like the guy, hes been very sweet to me through texting BUT i have not been on a date with him yet. I'm still on the fence. why would he ask me this?
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 Are you in the 5th grade? Seriously, I'm not trying to be mean, but that is kind of lame on his part. And why are you guys texting all the time and nothing else? How well can you get to know a person via text? You can't. You need some face to face time.
PrincessPeach Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 ...because he likes you a lot. Guys tend to fall for girls much faster than we fall for them. This isn't a rule, but I find a majority of the time this seems to be the case. I think it just has to do with how men and women are built differently on emotional levels. We think differently than men do and those differences are at the heart of plenty of attraction. I think he is just falling for you fast like some guys are prone to do and incorrectly hoping that you're falling for him just as or almost as quickly.
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 So you haven't been on a date because you are on the fence? Don't you think going on a date will tell which side of the fence you want to be on?
PrincessPeach Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 Since I couldn't go back and edit... Generally I think this happens more with younger guys (20's and below) and they tend to eventually grow out of it as they figure things out more.
edinsvet Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 Some people are nuts with SMS. and yeah it is a little creepy. I had one do this to me. We never met, and yet she sent a barrage of 30 text messages a day for about 3 days She was hot at least her photos looked good but eventually I got so sick of responding I just told her to please stop writing and that I was scared because I don't know you and you already sent 100 text messages how will it be after we ****? She stopped writing
Author Lucky555 Posted December 16, 2008 Author Posted December 16, 2008 I have not been on a date with him because we live a couple hours apart and I have been in college doing course work and getting ready for finals/taking them. Hes 26 Hes been texting for about 3 weeks, and getting to know him as in his interests and such. I do need to know him in person!! This is why i am asking why he says this when we have not been out on one date and he does not really know me! im glad he likes me most certainly and that he does want to meet up but it just seems "heavy" We met once and that was it. I'm kind of on the fence of if i want to date him at all. I'm still going to date another guy who I think is nice been on one date but i dont know him either.
BlueHarvest Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 From what I've seen... GUYS: They fall fast into the casual stage of a relationship but when they get serious it takes them alot longer to invest emotionally in long term relationiships. GALS: They take awhile to invest emotional in the short term but once they hit long term the invest more into the relationship then guys. The VERDICT: Girls and Guys are at mutual relationship investment when they take the transition from Casual--->Serious. After that girls tend to invest more emotionally at which point it's all dependent on the guy to either step up emotionally and become a long term partner or the girl needs to find a new guy.
MN randomguy Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 He just sounds really "green" meaning rookie not anything to do with driving a Prius he's intimidated and looking for affirmation. I wouldn't think he's bad BF potential because of this. But, he will be awkward and strange for the first couple of dates. BTW, you should ask him to stop texting and actually call you. People are different in Texting. It makes for a weird transition to real life.
carhill Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 why would he ask me this? Because he can? IDK....It's all just electrons... Go out on a date and get back to us on the "like" part....
Diamonds&Rust Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 It seems fit to mention that today's youth communicate via texting en masse, and research seems to disprove the conventional wisdom that it's terrible for them. Communication is communication. It has changed, for sure, no doubt a culture of instant gratification is producing young men who need 'do you like me?' spelled out. It would be much cuter if he'd done the traditional folded up piece of binder paper with two check-boxes for yes/no. Because he can? IDK....It's all just electrons... how frightening it would be if even 'real life' communications and our impressions thereof were the sum of electrical impulses...
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 From what I've seen... GUYS: They fall fast into the casual stage of a relationship but when they get serious it takes them alot longer to invest emotionally in long term relationiships. GALS: They take awhile to invest emotional in the short term but once they hit long term the invest more into the relationship then guys. The VERDICT: Girls and Guys are at mutual relationship investment when they take the transition from Casual--->Serious. After that girls tend to invest more emotionally at which point it's all dependent on the guy to either step up emotionally and become a long term partner or the girl needs to find a new guy. Ooo, very smart. I agree with this.
carhill Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 how frightening it would be if even 'real life' communications and our impressions thereof were the sum of electrical impulses... They are, but are coming from and are received by a biological machine rather than a plastic and silicon one. Having fought this battle myself in the decades prior to such communication mediums, when I read on LS about members being more comfortable with texting than talking to or being with another human, I start to worry about such delineations. Regarding the OP, is it really healthy to tell someone you "like them" for the first time by pounding on a keyboard or pushing buttons on a cell phone. Is it, really?
Diamonds&Rust Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 Regarding the OP, is it really healthy to tell someone you "like them" for the first time by pounding on a keyboard or pushing buttons on a cell phone. Is it, really? i think the message is more disturbing than the media "i like you" should not be a form of pressure, but it often is
MadBambi Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 Regarding the OP, is it really healthy to tell someone you "like them" for the first time by pounding on a keyboard or pushing buttons on a cell phone. Is it, really? Yeah, although we're all "hi-tech" these days 3 weeks worth of texting only is....weird? I don't know by day 3 i would've called him and let him know that you prefer to talk on the phone....well, i mean if you prefer to talk on the phone. Anyhow isn't that kinda like back in the day when no one talked on the phone but instead just IM'd each other and supposedly felt a connection? I say next time he texts you just call him back instead that way you can segue into a real life interaction and get a feel for each others personality and such.
LovieDove24 Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 To me, this shows insecurity. Harsh I know, but theres no way he can tell that he "likes" you just yet. He is only saying it to get the response "I like you too." It seems to me he is trying to cling. And since you've only had a texting relationship so far, I think thats kinda weird. On a side note, I've found from experience that starting off a relationship texting rather than (at least) phone conversations makes for a bumpy road ahead. Personalities are so much differant than small typed up quips.
Author Lucky555 Posted December 17, 2008 Author Posted December 17, 2008 AlainasMama: To me, this shows insecurity. Harsh I know, but theres no way he can tell that he "likes" you just yet. He is only saying it to get the response "I like you too." It seems to me he is trying to cling. And since you've only had a texting relationship so far, I think thats kinda weird. This is what if feels like to me that hes "clinging" on to me. He has already invited me to his game that he plays hes a carpenter right now he plays sports hes from another country This is really all i know about the guy. I personally would like a guy who is stable in his life. As far as i know he doesn't have health insurance, lives of his weekly paycheck, doesn't own a car, rents an apartment. . I just told him yesterday night that i may not be able to make it to our date because my car is broken and i have to wait for the shop to fix it.He then called me to ask me about my car and to see when i am going down this week. (This is by the way the only time he has called me)about 2.5 weeks of texts so far.He is insisting that i be there this Friday when i have told him its out of my controlIts actually really irritating me that he is insisting that i be there when i can't help it if my car is BROKEN!He offered to fix it for me. I'm currently also dating a guy who has his own house, car, good job, and i know he comes from a good family. He however started off aloof with me and he took forever to call me. He is now in more contact with me and I'm watching out because he was out of a relationship about 2 months ago. He seems like hes fine but we have a date planned. I'm taking it one date at a time to really get to know the person and see if its something i want.
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