Gunny376 Posted January 16, 2009 Posted January 16, 2009 Pete is in the drivers seat here. All he needs to do is turn the key, and begin driving. He's not the one who has abandoned the marriage. File, File, File, File, File, File, File, Start breaking up this train wreck. Don't wait for her to get knocked up by her boyfriend so she can muddy the waters for another 9 months. Don't wait for her to steal everything in sight. Don't wait for anything. Who cares about the damn car. Don't pay the bills on it. Don't make the payments. Who cares if it's repo'd? This is your life buddy, not an auto loan. Ditto the apartment. File! In the seperation agreement you can negotiate who gets the apartment. Then go to the apartment office and change the lease. If she wants it, she can sign a new lease. Ditto if you do. It's not like the apartment managment company has never delt with this situation before. I'd be suprised if they don't deal with it weekly. Stop making excuses, start taking control of your own life. There is always a price to pay for our mistakes. Your problems are tiny. An apartment lease and a car loan. Gawd, if they were all that simple. You are getting off easy. Damn'it LT I keep telling you these Pvt's. PFC's. and LCpls haven't been "In-country" like you and I have been! ! Lt's never listen to Gunny's! SemperFi Bro!
Author peteyj Posted January 17, 2009 Author Posted January 17, 2009 Bailing on $2K per month rent, getting an eviction and then bailing on a $40K car loan would probably screw me for the next ten years....Yeah it might just be money but the reality is she'd get off scott free, probably improve her life while the next ten years I'd be struggling just to get back where I started.... I've had bad credit in the past....In this day and age bad credit like that would be nothing but a nightmare... I wouldn't be able to buy a house, get a credit card or get another house.... In a sense she'd win and laugh all the way to some other guys misfortune.. No thanks... I'd rather deal with this crap for the next six months and then keep my car and don't have an eviction and bad credit on my name. And in my career now.. which I've built over the past ten years... a lot has to do with reputations and who you know and not having horrible credit....Moving to the next level with bad credit just won't happen.....I was turned down for a job in the past because of bad credit... I sure don't want to spend all of my thirties paying for something my soon to be ex-wife screwed me over on... So nice advice, but bad credit would screw me over far more than just sucking it up and dealing with her for the next six months or so.
mark982 Posted January 17, 2009 Posted January 17, 2009 i can see your point. BUT pelican has some damn good ideas. just give her electric and hot water, that's it.no need to provide other things, hell put the frig in your bedroom and lock the door.if you made it rough on her she'll disappear, hell that's what you want anyways.
Author peteyj Posted January 18, 2009 Author Posted January 18, 2009 I don't buy food anymore... I try to go out most of the time, but that gets expensive...The hardest part is that it's a 600 square foot apartment with nice views and one bedroom.... So she sleeps on the couch when she's here, which is hardly ever, and I sleep in the bedroom. But the bedroom has half of it blocked off now cause they had to fix the windows and walls... So that's where it's at... I'm not looking to shove anybody out. Even as much as I hate her at this point, I'm not looking to just throw her on the street. I'm not that kind of person... Yeah at times I do wish I'd do that, but then I'd feel bad about it....I'm not gonna do anything for her and the less we talk the better and as far as being friends in the future, I doubt it, but who knows... I'm not somebody who tries to burn bridges.. You never know who you meet or who somebody becomes down the line.... So I'll be as civil as possible and try to be as friendly as I possibly can considering the circumstances... Cause in the long run it's better to try and be civil for the next six months instead of trying to kill one another..... Doing martial arts and everything else settles me down some...Finding inner peace is what it's all about....Accepting that I'll be better off and finding this out now after 3+ years of marriage is far better than finding out 10 years from now that she's been doing it for years.
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