Entered a whirlwind relationship that confuses me

[roguefeather]

Hello all

 

Please bare with me while i try to explain the situation.

 

I met this girl online who is beautiful, classy and very lovable. We met in a mcdonalds parking lot after talking for about 2 weeks on the phone and net. We had coffee and decided to step out for a smoke into my car.Two hours of talking later, we were making out fiercely and continued to do so well into the wee hours of the morning. At first i was nervous meeting her as this type of girl never falls for me...or not for very long. We bid each other good night and the next night we were there in that parking lot again! This time things crossed the line a bit but i didnt mind at the time. She kissed me and she started everything that followed both nights. It was like she was a wolf hunting me, which felt good.

 

Fast Forward to a week later. We are lieing in her bed after the best sex i have ever had in my life and she tells me she loves me. We had seen each other several times during this week and sex has happened before. I replied to her "i...i think i love you too." I was taken aback and didnt know what to say to what she said. She teared up a little over that but not because i pretended to return her feelings. It was because i said "i think" before the i love you too. I do have strong feelings for her....dont get me wrong but love isnt one of them yet. I am saying it to her though....i know its wrong but i really like her and dont want to chase her off.

 

Forward to last week into last night. We both have very busy schedules. She is a mother of 3 and works full time. I live 1 hour from her and i am a postal employee. This makes it hard for us to see eachother. We have both been losing sleep almost nightly by seeing eachother and talking on the phone. It seems like we are both getting 4 hours sleep a night and its wearing on me. I have spent the night with her 6 times already in the past 2 weeks.

 

Anyway, she has some personality issues that bug me. In or converstations i am constantly getting miffed of things like, she hollers at her kids constantly which cuts into our talking time. Kids come first is understandable....but when she calls me and i actually talk to her for 2 minutes out of every 10...get old fast. She is also nit-picking over little things like improper choice of words like me saying rag instead of period. Little things like this to me are irrelivant and not even worth bringing up. Another thing she does that bothers me is her psyche major which she constantly uses on me.

 

Last night i decided to see a friend i have not seen in 15 years. I met him at the bowling ally so we could catch up. She was fine with it and i had been talking about it all day. After i get there she starts texting me and the convo quickly turns sour.

 

It went from,

"i wish you were here with me" to " i dont know if i ever had a man pick his friends over me when i have a free night, but its cool you have your own things to do."

 

I replied "are you mad at me?"

 

and she replied "you will not get mad at me if i have my night out with friends right? still stinks in a way."

 

i sent back "no i wouldnt get mad, you gotta have friends as well"

 

and she texted back "mad isnt the right word. dont know if i ever had a man choose friends over me when i have a free night. but i wouldnt say i was mad."

 

I replied "i dinna know it would upset you especially since i dont go out often......i need friends."

 

she replied " wow. i never said any of that. Feel like you are not hearing me. not upset that u r out. not upset that you r out with friends. look again at what i wrote."

 

Did i interpret her texts right? or was i not hearing her? i feel like i was right.

 

 

So she calls me and we argue about this for hours. I dont know what to make of this. I feel like she is already picking at me and tooo soon. I dont know why she got so upset at me over something so trivial in my mind. Having an hour or 2 to sit with an old friend was important to me and a well deserved break from her. I almost feel like im being smothered and have considered breaking it off with her for many reasons after last night.

 

I am confused. can anyone offer any advice?

[norajane]

I feel like she is already picking at me and tooo soon.

Yes, it is too soon for "love" and too soon for expectations that you'd drop everything in your life for her. But it's not too soon for you to pay attention to all the red flags warning you that you're getting in too deep with someone you hardly know.

 

Pay attention to your gut instincts. If this isn't feeling right, it's because it's not right. Maybe she's looking for a daddy for those kids and that's driving her need to get so close with you so quickly.

[prettybaby]

Uhm, she sounds freaking crazy Why even bother? Run!

[roguefeather]

so she calls me just now and is so sorry about all of this. it remind me of an article i stumbles across on the net talking about borderline personality disorders.

 

she has already spoke of marriage and is speaking of me moving in with her. she is low income and is struggling. perhaps you are right and she is looking for someone to take care of her or something. doesnt help that she is a psych major and uses that to try an manipulate me. i am seeing through and and just need some advice. thank you.

[D-Lish]

Any person that would guilt trip you over seeing your friends this early on in the relationship is someone to run screaming from.

 

I'd be livid if someone tried to control me in such a way after only a few weeks. Imagine what kind of controlling lunatic she would be longer term?

 

That "I love you" came way too fast!

 

She sounds really troubled and needy. Remaining involved with her will only give you grief.

 

Fighting and argueing this early on? The demands?

SO many red flags...

 

Run screaming from this woman.

[Benique]

Guess,all was so fast,indeed a whirlwind.

 

 

Red flags are seen well .

 

 

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"Husbands and wives, who sincerely loved each other during their earthy lives,live together again , albeit the mode of communication is the thought, and not the speech."