shesmiles Posted December 13, 2008 Posted December 13, 2008 Okay so I wrote a letter to my ex in the thread: [COLOR=#660000]Post here instead of contacting your ex![/COLOR] and then I showed some of my girls what I wrote and they encouraged me to write to my ex ... So this is what I said to him: I don't know why I'm hurting so much ... But I am, And Everyones telling me I should just send you how I'm feeling... So here I go ... Having me dump you, then start dating someone right away really ****ing hurts... and I know that, Three months isn't the longest time - But three months is long enough to get your dignity back, look at the relationship more objectively, and realize that HEY maybe you don't need this person in your life anymore. If I was in your shoes, and realized you missed me and wanted me back? Honestly, I would not get back together with you,... there are other fish in the sea, ones that won't break up with you and hurt you. And you know, if you and I did get back together things could improve but most likely wouldn't improve. Eventually, we'd go back to our sad state of affairs. The fact that I started dating someone else - and it took three months - to realize I missed you? That really did me in... So here I go anyways ... J ... I miss you almost everyday of my life - I know you don't believe me. Always thinking about you and it drives me crazy that almost everything in my life reminds me of you. Do you miss me? Don't you think about me? I was in your life for three years. I miss you so much I regret every break up I've caused, I wish things could be how they used to be... You were my bestfriend and boyfriend for three years, and it's hard living my life day by day knowing your no longer a call away and that were actually done. For good? No idea, I hope oneday you can contact me and ask me How I'm doing. I'm hoping you will never forget me - because I will never forget you, Remember our song? Difference - genuwine ... I remember the name but I don't have the guts to listen to the actual song. I listen to my ipod everynight because it seems to be the only thing that helps me sleep, and I listen to songs that remind me of you.. and I dream, Of us .. of our past, I dream of waking up from a nap next to you and kissing your cheeks until you open your beautiful green eyes with a smile and then you kiss me back. I miss your family and eating your italian dinners day after day. I miss being held by you, and having you tell me that you love me ever so much and that I complete you... going for walks late at night upnorth at my dads, both afraid to walk into something hungry and wild. The morning after the night I told you never to talk to me, You came from behind me on the mattress I was sleeping on and wrapped your arms around me and told me you never wanted to loose me... you laid there and kissed my hair and held me. I remember our one year: You cooked and made your upstairs dining table so beautiful with candles, I was very impressed. I miss you beyond words can explain and I know I took advantage of everything.. of you, So I know I deserve this ... and it hurts me so much, I never ment to hurt you when I found someone so soon, You know nobody will ever be able to replace my ' bubbaganoush ' ever ... you mean the world to me and as much as I want to be over you, I know I'll never be. I'll always have you in my heart, You were my highschool sweet heart and if I never see you again, and if there really is no future for us. you will be the story I tell my kids and my grand kids. You truly made me happy even if we fought over the stupidest things, I want you to know I'll never forget the first day we kissed. The first time we made love - I lost my virginity to you ... that was so special to me, You truly are something amazing even if you did me wrong. I forgave you because everyone makes mistakes and because I know you were truly sorry. I can't shake this feeling that you will come back to me when I'm partly healed. Come to me now if anything ... I miss your touch, Your voice, Your Family and your love. I love you J , You know that. Love, S Was this the right thing to do? I'm so nervous for a response. At this point I'd rather him just read what I said and take it in, then reply because I don't know how well I will be able to handle a harsh response.
alwayssme Posted December 13, 2008 Posted December 13, 2008 Keep us posted on how it goes! Good luck!
EmperorR Posted December 13, 2008 Posted December 13, 2008 It would be better to not send the letter, but only you can make the decision. Letter is nice btw.
Geishawhelk Posted December 13, 2008 Posted December 13, 2008 Was this the right thing to do? I'm so nervous for a response. At this point I'd rather him just read what I said and take it in, then reply because I don't know how well I will be able to handle a harsh response. No it wasn't the right thing to do. basically, as you're the one who broke up with him, you are now messing with his head. He's trying to move on. Do him - and you - the biggest favour possible and LEAVE HIM ALONE! Go complete no contact, don't write to him don't phone him don't IM him, don't e-mail - Nothing. Your life is NOT over. You will love again, and believe me, your kids and grandkids will never hear about him, because first of all it would be a terrible insult to your husband and father-of-your-kids, for you to tell his children about THIS 'love' and secondly - hopefully, you will have moved on enough to know this is not the be all and end all of your relationships. You've gained a great deal of sympathy from many on this forum. I feel for you too, but I suspect you're very young. I also suspect you need a bit of a kick-in-the-pants, because the more you wallow, the more morose you are, the more sympathy you seek, and the more you ask us to support you in your misery - the less you'll get over it and heal. You Broke Up with Him. Really, you need to be a bit more mature about this.
Author shesmiles Posted December 13, 2008 Author Posted December 13, 2008 By sending that - I feel a little of stress has lifted off of me . Just knowing that he may not respond but he did read it and did take it in, helps me a great deal. I want him to know how I'm feeling - I'm very open like that I can't put on a fake smile and pretend my life is wonderful because it's not . My life sucks, it's horrible I cry myself to sleep almost every night and this morning was In tears " just because " they decided to fall from my eyes.
spupwc Posted December 13, 2008 Posted December 13, 2008 nice letter, as a dumpee, the first thought that came to my mind was, DA**! I wish my ex wud send me a letter like this! I was hurt so bad from the breakup and have come along way, m still grieving some but doesn't hurt like it use too, m not sure where he's at from this point but if he's like me, he will be shocked at first, then prob. think with his head and not his heart and run away from u. hard to undo the damage that was done especially wen u dumped him and ran instantly into another mans arms...exactly wat my ex did, we did get bak 2mths later and she ended up cheating on me again with same guy.. wev'e been split for over two mths now and it is a dead horse... just leave him alone, enough hurt has been done...
Author shesmiles Posted December 13, 2008 Author Posted December 13, 2008 I think your right - I feel like I need to delete facebook for awhile . Stay off the computer - that's where all the temptations come from . I know I messed up and hurt him like crazy which also means I know we couldn't go anywhere any time soon. Everything is still to fresh and it hurts alot. I miss him more then anything but I'm trying to suck it up .
Author shesmiles Posted December 13, 2008 Author Posted December 13, 2008 the one I was recently dating? We broke up I told him the truth and What I was feeling and he said he understood and he wanted to stick around and be there for me because he wants a future with me and I told him there is no garantee and he said he'll take his chance.
Rafa Posted December 16, 2008 Posted December 16, 2008 If you feel like that about him, then why aren't you still with him? Why did you leave him? Why aren't you trying to patch things up?
Author shesmiles Posted December 16, 2008 Author Posted December 16, 2008 I left him because everything happened to soon, we happened to soon and he knows that and right now it's like I can't be in a relationship.
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