lilah_k Posted December 12, 2008 Posted December 12, 2008 I guess it's a very popular case, girls asking why a guy who seems to like them, ignores them some times. My problem is that I don't know whether a certain behavior can be considered ignoring or not. There's a guy who "might" like me. At the moment he's in a different city but we talk almost everyday. He does things that can be considered signs of affection, but I'm not sure, because it seems as if sometimes he ignores me. When we're talking, very often he may be doing something else at the same time or talking to other people, so not fully paying attention to what I'm saying. Or sometimes he forgets about things we talk about. Also he seems to want to talk to me only when he has the time to call or chat. If I initiate a conversation, he may leave pretty quick, start doing something else or talking to someone else. I have to mention this guy is very busy and only has a few hours per day to do things other than his work so I do appreciate it that makes the time to talk, and he pretty much tells me everything about his life. But I'm very busy too, and I still manage to pay attention to him when he's talking. So I think I need somebody to explain to me what can be considered ignoring by a guy, and what not!
carhill Posted December 12, 2008 Posted December 12, 2008 To me, either one of two things is at work, or possibly a combination, though I doubt it 1. He's too busy and focused to have a relationship 2. He's not sufficiently interested in you If a man is interested in a woman, his time expands to include her. He may not be obvious about it, but he does listen and remembers conversations and items of interest in her life. This allows him to become more intimate with her. That's kinda the goal of a relationship, I presume Oh, forgot...3. He could be "unhealthy".... that one's too hard to explain here
GoneButNotForgotten Posted December 12, 2008 Posted December 12, 2008 He could also be not realizing that it is happening. Ask him about it. A simple question of are you busy because you seem distracted may snap him out of it. I know my ex used to love trying to talk to me while I was writing a program for class and I can't multitask worth a damn. After she asked me a few times I realized that I could stop what I was doing and pick it back up in a few minutes.
Author lilah_k Posted December 12, 2008 Author Posted December 12, 2008 Thanks for your responses, yes I think I'm going to ask about it from him. That probably makes the most sense. Cause the rest of his behavior makes it difficult for me to think that he's uninterested or unhealthy.
carhill Posted December 13, 2008 Posted December 13, 2008 So, if you called him right now and had this really cool thing to tell him about, what would happen? Hey, why don't you do that and get back to us? All I'm going to say is, IME, when a man is attracted to and interested in a woman in a romantic way, hearing her voice is right at the top of things that make his day. I'm speaking from a potential LTR perspective, not casual socio-sexual interest. Best wishes!
Recommended Posts