4givrnt4gtr Posted December 11, 2008 Posted December 11, 2008 I am getting in trouble and I really dont know what to do about this! Ive been hanging out with this guy, that by all standards is a sweetheart. He is a little on the cocky side, at the most random times, for the most random reasons. Makes me wonder if deep inside he thinks he is all that and a side of fries....turn off.. In any case he told me he wanted to go out with me a while back. I had just broken up with my bf so I told him i just wanted to be friends, hang out etc. ANyway we talked a few more times and I kept thinking I really dont want to date him. So i told him this, told him I just wanted to be friends and I wasnt looking for a boyfriend. I told him i liked hanging out with him but if he felt i was misleading him I totally understood. WEll after that we continued hanging out, totally friendly in my mind. Last weekend we went out for dinner, we had a good time, it was fun. Last night i gave him a call to ask him if he wanted to join me for a few drinks as celebration for ending school. (I should mention i dont know many people where I live, he is one out of three, and the other two live about 30 minutes away. He literally lives a few blocks from me). He didnt pick up but then this morning he called to apologized for not answering and asked me if i wanted to have dinner and the drink he owed me from last night. I accepted, and as we continued talking I noticed we were getting a bit flirtatious. Yet...i still dont want to date him. And im afraid i may be giving him the wrong idea....THe worst part is that while im flirting its so fun...but then i consider the idea of dating him, it just seem appealing to me at all. ANd then i really dont want to stop hanging out with him....he's really nice...im just not physically attracted to him (he is cute though, i just dont feel it...im weird). Please help me figure it out??? pleaseee? what should I do???
Geishawhelk Posted December 11, 2008 Posted December 11, 2008 It's a platonic friendship. Like "When Harry met Sally" but without the orgasm. Good platonic friends flirt, because they know it's not going anywhere. You've told him this. He knows this. You've made it clear. Now what's happening, is that as your sub-conscious has anchored onto the idea that this is going nowhere - you've relaxed your grip, let go of your inhibitions, and you feel safe. Because there's no obligation or commitment. But you need to tell him that you feel very relaxed and happy in his company, because he's not making demands on you..... See where that takes you.
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