nowhereman82 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 So won't bore you with the details but basically.... anyone want to chime in on dating neighbors, good, bad, the ugly? Any personal stories? Things to think on? I've thought of a lot on my own and read some stuff online so I know what I have to consider. She lives in the same apartment complex as me and is basically like 30 seconds away
Ruby Slippers Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 A good friend of mine started seeing the guy who lived in the house next door a few years ago. They had been friends for years, but they had both always been in other relationships. He proposed to her this summer, and they now live together.
Adamagnet Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 It probably wouldn't be the brightest idea if you own your house and so does she, but since you are renters there's no real issue because if things go sour you can always move.
Kamille Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 I'm hoping the neighbor I met this morning is 1) single and 2) has no qualms about dating neighbors cause he's hot and he plays piano and he has a dog. But to be more to the point, I once dated a roomate. We were together for a year. When it ended, we still maintained a good friendship. It was very sitcom-ish of us. Every situation is different. Make your own happen.
Author nowhereman82 Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 I been thinking if we should lay out any ground rules before things get involved or physical in regards to privacy and such. Way too convenient for both of us to walk across the hall and just knock on the door any time of day
D-Jam Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Meh...I say go for it. If we keep thinking in terms of "who we can date" as people who can be easily "gotten rid of" if things don't work out, then we'll be single for life. I can imagine her coming over to borrow a cup of sugar....wearing nothing but a short robe.
prettybaby Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 It's funny, I thought about this a while ago. And honestly, if we're talking about considering a neighbor for dates: I doubt I would (although never say never lol), but, it seems like it would be such a bad situation. You'd have way less privacy than in a "regular" situation, and if things turned sour, you'd be stuck living right next to each other. So no.
IrishCarBomb Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 It's certainly do-able, but requires a lot more responsibility and discipline on both your parts. The communication channels must always be open; you must not hesitate to talk about your expectations and anxieties no matter how much you think it will offend, give the wrong idea, or disappoint the other person. Further, you have to make it known that she can talk to you about anything no matter what. Do not judge or withdraw when she just communicates her perspective to you. The problem is that these requirements exist on both ends. If you are being perfectly open and honest, she must be also. Otherwise the whole thing comes crashing down, and can have some bad fallout.
Kamille Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Damn! You're not my hot new neighbor thinking of asking me out on a date. While I was dating my roomate, I think we just managed privacy issues as they came along. There wasn't any need to have a talk. I remember once showing up at his door and he telling me he needed some time alone that night. It wasn't a big deal - it was obvious this would happen at one point, and the fact I understood and didn't take it personally only made our relationship stronger. ICB is right. The one thing that happens when dating roomates/neighbors is that you need to start with good honest communication.
Trialbyfire Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 I've dated three neighbors in the past two years with zero problems. As long as you're adult about it when it ends, no big deal.
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