DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 I dealt with a lot of pain from losing my ex. I dealt with a lot of trust issues when she broke up with me So I wondered how I could fix this all. I decided to get two new Gf's and date them at the same time. This worked.
pushforward Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Just a forewarning. I know your story and know who you are. Be careful, I hope you took time to heal and aren't jumping into rebounds. You will come out with more headaches in the long run if you don't properly heal. If you are ready. NICE! Hope it goes well and have fun.
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 pushforward ma friend, how do you know my true identity? And i was only messing around. I couldn't lie to two girls like that. even though ive been lied to by girls.
EmperorR Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 lol , and yeah I know exactly what you meant since I';ve been hurt by my ex, I'll never hurt a girl like the way she hurt and lied to me.
pushforward Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 pushforward ma friend, how do you know my true identity? And i was only messing around. I couldn't lie to two girls like that. even though ive been lied to by girls. It's only obvious, when I lurk here and you give clues. Your name for one. You mentioning your other accounts getting banned. Now your picture is up. Oh, and your writing style. Elementary, my dear Watson. I have too much time on my hands. How are you holding up?
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 Lol I'm holding up okay. To be honest, if you have ever seen the VH1 show "The Pickup Artist", it really works. Like really. I went up to some girl today being really cheesy and using lines and techniques from the show, and it worked. Ended up getting her number >_> Lol It helps a lot to talk to new girls and stuff... but the pain cannot be masked like that. At least not to someone whos eyes are wide open. It's remembering intimate moments and stuff that makes it all hurt bad. I had a dream last night where I was with my ex, and she was the girl I "thought" she was.. which she clearly wasnt in reality... damn, though, its all painful. I really am thinking of openly dating 2 women at once, making sure they know about eachother. lol. My best friend andy has 3 girlfriends right now.
pushforward Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Lol I'm holding up okay. To be honest, if you have ever seen the VH1 show "The Pickup Artist", it really works. Like really. I went up to some girl today being really cheesy and using lines and techniques from the show, and it worked. Ended up getting her number >_> Lol It helps a lot to talk to new girls and stuff... but the pain cannot be masked like that. At least not to someone whos eyes are wide open. It's remembering intimate moments and stuff that makes it all hurt bad. I had a dream last night where I was with my ex, and she was the girl I "thought" she was.. which she clearly wasnt in reality... damn, though, its all painful. I really am thinking of openly dating 2 women at once, making sure they know about eachother. lol. My best friend andy has 3 girlfriends right now. Ah, I see. All in all there is no technique for healing. Just time and time alone. I'm taking a break from dating period. After this whole fiasco, I rather heal and just go out and have fun. Not really looking for the opposite sex to temporarily fill the void. In my case I know it would be a rebound and I just can't do that to another person. I may be too nice for my own good. Maybe I need to get my heart stomped on to turn on man whore mode. Haha.
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 Dude you need to come to Pittsburgh, PA. We will chill and there is no shortage of women. Just don't be picking up females in clubs. That, in my honest opinion, is a terrible place to pick up potential relationships rofl. I'd target starbux and libraries, personally. We need to hit up some starbux and libraries brother.
pushforward Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Dude you need to come to Pittsburgh, PA. We will chill and there is no shortage of women. Just don't be picking up females in clubs. That, in my honest opinion, is a terrible place to pick up potential relationships rofl. I'd target starbux and libraries, personally. We need to hit up some starbux and libraries brother. WHAT! Fly over to CALI. You need to come here any ways to start your career. With your good looks, you can get all the girls and I can be the wing man. Haha, actually I just turned 21 and went to a club in Hollywood. Pretty good experience. I never ever want to go to an 18 and over club again. LOL. Age and alcohol make such the difference.
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 Lol man you are far too kind, seriously. You don't need to be anyones wingman, man, you can be the star. I'll definitely be in CALI before long man and we will take the place by storm. I don't know about clubs though... at least not ones with booming music you can't talk over... because I rely a lot on what I say, and if a girl can't hear what I say, man, I feel powerless. Not being able to speak, is like kryptonite to superman. I am powerless without my personality. We should hit up some CALI libraries and starbux rofl
openbook08 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 never come to Ireland then guys cos thats the ONLY place they all meet pubs n clubs. its sickening and dating?? dont make me laugh think im gonna cross the ocean ps there are some really nice irish men&woman just no dating scene whatsoever. so i remain heartbroken & he has moved on no probs. pps i remember you too dsm-iv tom!!
pushforward Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Lol man you are far too kind, seriously. You don't need to be anyones wingman, man, you can be the star. I'll definitely be in CALI before long man and we will take the place by storm. I don't know about clubs though... at least not ones with booming music you can't talk over... because I rely a lot on what I say, and if a girl can't hear what I say, man, I feel powerless. Not being able to speak, is like kryptonite to superman. I am powerless without my personality. We should hit up some CALI libraries and starbux rofl Haha, yeah, I don't need to be anyone's wingman. I'm actually pretty decent looking kid. Haha. Well, there are dive bars and lounges. Only interest women have out here are: Money, power, fame, height, looks, personality. Good luck with what you were born with. I only got the personality! Sad, but true. That's why you be the front man. You got the looks and personality, I'll just leech and be part of the entourage. XD
Anastasia0309 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Why do people say not to rush into a rebound cause you will be hurting more? Why would you hurt more in a rebound?? Can anyone explain that? Or is it something people just say just to say it???
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 openbook come to the USA and we'll take you out on a date lol and pushforward man don't be so modest. i bet you ANY money you're a good looking kid, straight up. you will be right by my side man not just part of the entourage lol. hell, for all i know, youre better looking than me. you have no pic up! but in any case bro those qualities you mentioned are all ANY woman is interested in rofl. I can only check 2 things off on that list so far Unless the type of power they like is strength... because I do lift weights haha... but alas, im not very strong... yet anyways. But ya. Open book you come to USA, then you and me will fly to cali, and the three of us will take cali by storm like a hurricane in florida.
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 Anastasia, they say that because they know you haven't healed, and you could be leading on the person by talking to them/flirting/etc. And in the end, it will bite you and their pain will become your pain and it will be nasty. That's just one possible scenario. You just basically haven't healed, and therefor you have no heart to give to someone else. If by rebound you mean sex, then well, if that's how easy you are (no offense of course), then the least of your problems is worrying about a quote. My dad saw girls flirting with me and he strongly told me not to dare jump into another relationship so soon. (Been 5 weeks since my ex left me). I told him I won't jump into one. I'll jump into two. He laughed
openbook08 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 oh stop! im actually lookin into moving. im a teacher and i love my job, i love my kids & itd be very sad for me to leave them (such a softy with them!) but i feel i need to break free (run away ?!) . my life wouldve been very diff. if i was still with the other problem so im tryin to turn it around now & take advantage of all the possibilties the world has to offer! openbook!!!! i guess ill be the sensible one while you two guys live the lifestyles of the rich and famous!! stuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuupid exes. and as for rebounds?? ya its cos my heart isnt healed & im not gonna be selfish enough to use someones elses to heal mine. but thats just me. im not the "to get over one guy get under another" kinda girl!!!
Anastasia0309 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Does it still make it a rebound if you did get over your ex with the rebound but then fall in love with them? Then it didn't work with the rebound but now your hurting over them? Is that still a rebound?
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 Openbook you sound like a great person. Definitely sounding like its your ex's loss here. Seriously, you sound like an honest and loving person. Shame on ya ex But anastasia, wtf? You have relations with a new person quickly after losing someone, then that's a rebound. The advanced details are irrelevant.
openbook08 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 i had to read that a few times!! oh gosh ive no clue sweetheart, ive never been in that situation. i find it hard to imagine i would be. but suppose it depends if youre the dumper or dumpee does it?? im the dumpee. i just dont wanna hurt anyone or lead anyone on. but then again you never know when youll fall in love again i really dont know. hope youre ok? or is it just hypothetical.
Anastasia0309 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 What and who defines quickly? Is starting a relationship 8 months after ending a 3 year relationship to soon?
openbook08 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 many thanks for the kind words dsm-iv tom! im guessin 99% of us here are our exes loss which means we really should be excited about the day we meet someone who does deserve us!! with all these amazing people on here! im hopin itll be one of the 99% ha ha but go raibh maith agat! (irish for thanks)
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 No anastasia not necessarily. 8 months is certainly within the possible realm of a true healing. If you would've said 8 days or 8 weeks, though, I'd have said otherwise. But it depends. How long were you single after the breakup? As in, how long did you spend time by yourself? How long did you let yourself heal alone? Or did you just start hooking up with people soon after, but not date anyone officially til 8 months later? When I lost my first love, I was kissing girls 2 or 3 months later. But I wasn't over her til 8 months later. Then I started a new relationship like you. And I lost my second love November 4th after about a year of commitment. Worst feeling on Earth.
Anastasia0309 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Well, I never stopped talking to my first ex. He was my first serious relationship. First person I lived with. He was just sayin he was gonna move to another state so I started dating this guy without tellin him but I was going through other things and I don't know if I was over my first ex or just trying to feel a void with the new guy because I needed the first. I don't know if I will never know but I do know I love the "Rebound" and am now hurting over him but I also hurt over the first one as well. It's a mess.
Author DSM-IV Tom Posted December 9, 2008 Author Posted December 9, 2008 Classic example of why you don't do what you did. That sounds like you rebounded definitely. Used someone for your benefit and it fell through and now you have to face 2x the problem, because you never dealt with the first one properly. You must learn to sort out things differently.
Anastasia0309 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Yeah, I guess so. Thanks so much! Rebounds suck.
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