mswonderful Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 I was cruising dating articles when I found this: http://searchwarp.com/swa388088.htm, the 7 Signs of an Interested Long-Term Man. If you get a few mins, check it out. As a female, of course I want to know. I especially want to know about the first hint: apparently men who are interested in a woman for the long term may not be very aggressive contacters in the beginning for various reasons. Do you males agree with this article?
Gremio Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 "Woman almost always have the support of their friends in romantic situations which allows them to feel confidant and happy about expressing their emotions; men often do have this luxury and for this reason might not express their true feelings right away." I may read this article at a future time but can't now seeing the obvious mistakes in the first paragraph alone. I can agree with the first idea. The last woman was seriously interested texted me everyday and called every other most often. I would always respond, but sometimes I took my time to reply if I was busy so as to not appear too eager or clingy.
carhill Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Do you males agree with this article? Can't speak for other men, but IME those signs described my interest in a LTR and a woman perfectly. I've never been interested in woman for anything other than that so have no clue about the alternative psychology (STR's/dating/FWB). I'd rather live alone. If you have any specific questions about aspects of the article, I can share my perspective on those.... I especially want to know about the first hint: apparently men who are interested in a woman for the long term may not be very aggressive contacters in the beginning for various reasons.IME, contact was not aggressive but the messages apparently are clear. The signals of interest are there and received.
OpenBook Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 IME, contact was not aggressive but the messages apparently are clear. The signals of interest are there and received. Clear to whom exactly?? How do we know you guys are interested in us if you DON'T approach us? What exactly IS "non-aggressive contact" anyway? I'm completely confused.
carhill Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Perhaps it might help if you explain what you consider "approaching".... I can't recall ever approaching a woman I don't know sexually and/or physically (meaning getting into her space). Rather, I engage her topically and intellectually and let my body language, facial expressions and eye contact indicate interest. If I feel the interest, I'm transparent to a woman who is like-minded in her perception. I just did this Saturday on my mileage run with a FA working the first class cabin while I was waiting for the lav. We just shared small talk, but I found her demeanor and aura attractive so engaged her on that level. I stepped up close to her, then looked beyond her to the galley table and noted the label of the wine they were serving (it was an Aussie shiraz) and talked briefly about my most recent trip there. I didn't make any comments about her appearance or anything of a flirtatious nature. Rather, very low key but indicated interest by my expressions and actions. She later remembered my name and that I wanted the shiraz and, interestingly, I didn't give her my name nor asked for hers. She looked it up on the manifest. Upon landing, the FA's dismissed the F pax first and, upon passing her, I touched her arm lightly, looked in her eyes, and quietly said "welcome home" (she's based at LAX) and "happy holidays". She smiled, waved and said "bye" as I exited to the jetway. You have to understand that I'm married and the foregoing is provided strictly for educational purposes. Had I been single, the dynamic would've been similar but I might have sought out more personal information from her or given her my travel card (I travel for fun and have a card I hand out to people who are interested in what I do). As it was, it was just a pleasant near-end to a long day of flying
MN randomguy Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Yeah, mostly common sense type stuff. The one about remembering little things is good insight too. If you're trying to start a relationship you're conscious of things that you can build new conversations off of. Hopefully some common experiences. The payoff to knowing whether she's Mac or PC or what breed her childhood dog was usually aren't sexual or very immediate.
BlueHarvest Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 All 7 of those signs are exactly what I would expect a woman to look for in a man. The "meeting the friends" part is a bit on the vague side and honestly, sometimes your friends can be crass, it isn't THAT important to meet your friends. Personally I think friends and lovers should be kept seperate for the most part. It helps make a healthier relationship if you have people that don't know your SO and that you can hang out with.
carhill Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 Personally I think friends and lovers should be kept seperate for the most part. It helps make a healthier relationship if you have people that don't know your SO and that you can hang out with. I'm curious as to why. We have concentric circles of friends who sometimes don't know each other, but they all know both of us. I'm sure many of my wife's girlfriends have heard shyte about me and still look me in the eye when we're together. It's called being adults. No one is perfect As a gentleman, I don't talk to my male friends about personal issues with my wife. That I think is crass. I talk to her
Jims555 Posted December 9, 2008 Posted December 9, 2008 read it, i thought the beginning stuff was just fluff until i got to meet family and personal space parts. no one meets my family till i know they are sticking around for a while because i don't want to listen to my sister and mother asking me "where the hell did you find her?" if i put up a couple pictures of us around the house, thats about equal to meeting the family. if i give you a drawer though, i plan on you being around for quite a while. the rest of the stuff listed, i thought, was just normal stuff you do in any relationship. not just long term ones.
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