LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 While out last night, a man that I considered "kind of" cute started talking to me and saying how pretty I am, etc. I asked how old he is and he said "I'm 34 how about you?"...I said I'm 31. He replied, "Oh, why aren't we married?"...and it isn't like he followed it with a chuckle or anything...is that supposed to be some kind of memorable pick-up line, or something you should think of as charming? I was actually to meet up with another guy, who turned out to be so drunk that he wasn't worthy of much attention. So I hung out on my own and while this other man is firing on me, drunkie doesn't even try to come and interrupt...I kept looking at him for a chance to throw a signal that I'd like him to save me but he was in his own little, drunken world...so this guy hitting on me could see that I was doing this, but he kept on and it was kind of annoying. But I was flattered by how "pretty" he seemed to think I was...I did collect his phone # before leaving, but I don't know if I'll call him...I can't decide if that brief encounter with him screamed desperate, or just romantic in a weird way?
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 If a guys asks me why I'm not married, I run in the other direction. If that didn't bother you, and you got his number, you could call. You wouldn't be losing much if he wasn't interested.
refurb Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 I don't know what to say.... Let me give a recap: 1. "kind of" cute guy says something in an attempt to be funny or cute and you take offense by reading to much into it. 2. You were supposed to hang out with "drunk guy", then get upset when he doesn't rescue you from "kind of" cute guy. 3. "kind of" cute guy doesn't really interest you, but you like it when he calls you pretty. What the f%^k? RF
Author LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Author Posted December 8, 2008 If a guys asks me why I'm not married, I run in the other direction. He didn't ask why I'M not married, he asked why aren't HE and I married! As in married to each other!
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 Ahhhhh...that's different. I think it's kind of cute. Depends on the delivery.
Author LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Author Posted December 8, 2008 I don't know what to say.... Let me give a recap: 1. "kind of" cute guy says something in an attempt to be funny or cute and you take offense by reading to much into it. 2. You were supposed to hang out with "drunk guy", then get upset when he doesn't rescue you from "kind of" cute guy. 3. "kind of" cute guy doesn't really interest you, but you like it when he calls you pretty. What the f%^k? RF 1. He didn't say anything to "offend" me. I just wanted to be left alone. But he was too nice of a guy to say "shove off!". And excuse me but I'm trying to be a little cautious about getting involved with the desperate type...It's just too early to judge if that's what he is... 2. As for drunk guy, who called me up and invited me there, was not only drunk but surrounded by women when I got there so why would I try to "hang out" with him? I sat down and a had drink and figured he would come talk to me if he wanted to. But since it was HIM that invited me there, he at least should have been cool enough to bother seeing if I was doing ok. So THAT guy offended me, and I'll never talk to him again! 3. I haven't said that he didn't interest me, I'm just not sure if I'm interested. I believe that's allowed.
sb129 Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 I think that he sounds infinitely better than "drunk guy". At least he made an effort and tried to be funny. Its just as hard for guys to think of the right thing to say off the bat as it is for girls. I think it took some guts for him to even talk to you when you were clearly there to meet someone else. I say go with it. You never know- outside of the club scenario he might be a really cool guy.
BubblyPopcorn Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 I haven't said that he didn't interest me, I'm just not sure if I'm interested. I believe that's allowed. LOL, that is one heck of a contradiction missy!
Author LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Author Posted December 8, 2008 Ahhhhh...that's different. I think it's kind of cute. Depends on the delivery. Yea I guess it's hard to explain that part...at 1st my reaction is "WHAT!"...or, "you have to be kidding me!"....but I guess it's kind of sweet, almost like saying "where have you been all my life", love-at-1st-sight kind of manner...
Author LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Author Posted December 8, 2008 LOL, that is one heck of a contradiction missy! The 1st meeting is not always enough to be 100% sure if your interested. Enough to think about it, though.
sb129 Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 As to your original question "Cheesy or charming?" I say it falls somewhere between the two, but erring on the side of charming.
sb129 Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 The 1st meeting is not always enough to be 100% sure if your interested. Enough to think about it, though. Enough to get a second meeting?
BubblyPopcorn Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 The 1st meeting is not always enough to be 100% sure if your interested. Enough to think about it, though. I know it was just funny how you phrased it.
Author LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Author Posted December 8, 2008 As to your original question "Cheesy or charming?" I say it falls somewhere between the two, but erring on the side of charming. Like that analogy . I just might call him...why not...
sb129 Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 Like that analogy . I just might call him...why not... You have nothing to lose....
xpaperxcutx Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 wouldn't you say that he was trying too hard?
kashmir Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 wouldn't you say that he was trying too hard? Give the guy a break. He saw a woman he found attractive and he went for her. Now you're going to try to discourage the OP from contacting him because he didn't use the right balance of effort that you find satisfactory. Let her decide whether she found him attractive enough to call him. No need to analyze his every move and word. It's hard enough already.
D-Jam Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 My feelings: 1) Don't ever mess with drunk guy again. He blew it and doesn't deserve a 2nd chance. 2) "Kind-of" cute guy was trying to be charming, but wasn't too skilled at it. I'd give him a C+ or B- for trying at least. Lord knows I hear enough female friends complain that their choices in men never will pass them a compliment or be romantic. 3) The "married" comment was the right idea, but badly played. How I would have done it were to keep in conversation, little flirtation and flattery, then if the question of the girl being single came up, I would NOT have mentioned "married", but more "wow...some lucky guy hasn't snatched up a beautiful girl like you yet?" It could go good or bad...but that's the risk one takes. She could be offended or put off or on the defense...and thus I failed. BUT...she could toss back a little flirtation and laugh it off, and then I know I am a possibility. That's when I make a suggestion about calling her and going out sometime. Like I said...his heart is in the right place, but his game needs to be tweaked. If you think he's cute in some way, charming, and respectful to you as a lady...then see where this goes. Worse case scenario you go on one date, not feel anything, and move on. Even if he becomes a weirdo you can just not answer the phone or bluntly tell him it's not going to happen. Better that than wonder what could have been, or go out on a bunch of dates with more "drunkies".
Geishawhelk Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 Like that analogy . I just might call him...why not... That would be cheer-ming....?
sunshinegirl Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 While out last night, a man that I considered "kind of" cute started talking to me and saying how pretty I am, etc. I asked how old he is and he said "I'm 34 how about you?"...I said I'm 31. He replied, "Oh, why aren't we married?"...and it isn't like he followed it with a chuckle or anything...is that supposed to be some kind of memorable pick-up line, or something you should think of as charming? Depends completely on delivery. From what you've written here, I would consider it extremely lame. I appreciate a genuine, open, friendly "Hi, I'm Joe..." to any kind of pick-up line.
xpaperxcutx Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 Give the guy a break. He saw a woman he found attractive and he went for her. Now you're going to try to discourage the OP from contacting him because he didn't use the right balance of effort that you find satisfactory. Let her decide whether she found him attractive enough to call him. No need to analyze his every move and word. It's hard enough already. The OP said she was very put off by his attention. And she had wanted drunken guy to save her from him. So what is there to analyze except she didn't really find him very attractive or charming in the slightest.
Author LoveLace Posted December 8, 2008 Author Posted December 8, 2008 Depends completely on delivery. From what you've written here, I would consider it extremely lame. I appreciate a genuine, open, friendly "Hi, I'm Joe..." to any kind of pick-up line. He seemed genuine enough, otherwise. But "trying too hard" might actually be a good description. I remember that I kept looking over at drunk guy so it was clear that I was in some kind of other situation (even though a crappy one)...once he said "tell me about yourself" but I must have beat around the bush and still kept looking over at drunkie...then he says, "are you going to tell me about yourself or not?"....he didn't say it in a mean way, he was always smiling, but still at that point I sord of thought most guys would have taken a hint by now that maybe I wasn't interested, instead of persisting like that. He just seemed very confident and not the least bit nervous, yet maybe a little desperate at the same time. But compliment-wise he did say a lot of the right things, so I guess there isn't enough to go on to completely rule out calling...However, if I already got a "pushy" feeling from him, that's not a good predictor of what it could be like dating him...I dont' think he's undeserving of a phone call but I'm not in a hurry to call either.
RecordProducer Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 I think the joke was charming. It was definitely a joke. I don't think it was a marriage proposal. Desperate or romantic? In any case, he's attracted to you. How much, you won't know unless you give him a chance. I just don't understand why you wanted to get rid of a guy whom you found kind of cute. If you so wanted to get rid of him, then forget about him; why bother thinking/talking about someone you don't even like?
amaysngrace Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 I think it's cheesy. He's preying on the fact that you're older than 30 and not married. He also makes himself seem as though he's the marrying type. Player.
kashmir Posted December 8, 2008 Posted December 8, 2008 The OP said she was very put off by his attention. And she had wanted drunken guy to save her from him. So what is there to analyze except she didn't really find him very attractive or charming in the slightest. Well she did refer to him as "kinda cute guy," and she's questioning whether to call him or not. I'd guess that if she wasn't attracted to him at all she wouldn't have made this thread in the first place. Hell, she probably wouldn't have even remembered the comment he made. It seems to me like she's coming on here to ask US if she's attracted to him, based on whether that comment was towards the charming or cheesy end, though she's the only one that can decide that. I was just saying not to be so hard on the guy by painting him as desperate for making that comment. He obviously needs to work on his charisma a bit, and he's doing that by going out to clubs and approaching women like the OP. DOesn't mean he's desperate or trying too hard...
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